


Easy Prey

by BlueOrbit



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Anal Sex, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Basketball, Bets, Bottom Im Changkyun | I.M, Boys Being Boys, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Jealousy, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Possessive Behavior, Possessive kihyun, Sex, Sleeping Together, Top Yoo Kihyun, and also assholes, changki, changki rise, my baby chang, pinning kihyun, poor baby changkyun, protect changkyun, sorry for all the sin I'm doing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-03
Updated: 2019-10-01
Packaged: 2020-01-04 11:31:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 51,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18342812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlueOrbit/pseuds/BlueOrbit
Summary: [MX Fic Request]Changki high school au where Kihyun is straight but sleep with Changkyun because a bet. After that night Kihyun bullies him trying to cover how much he wants to do it with Changkyun again.





	1. 3

**Author's Note:**

> Hello my dear changkinators!! This is a fic request from tumblr so I decided to give it a shot. I really enjoyed writing this. I hope you like reading it as well. I don't plan to keep it longer than 3 chapters so have fun and tell me what do you think!!

Everybody in the area is standing. It’s the last thirty second of the game and Kihyun’s team is losing with just one point. Kihyun knows what he must do but their rival is so good so he can’t do anything despite that he can catch his teammate Hyungwon’s struggle to pass the ball to Hoseok who is at the other side of the court.

Shit, Kihyun curses. He must do something quickly because if they can’t, MonHigh will say bye to the nationals and as the team’s captain Kihyun can’t allow that. He worked so hard for this. Everybody said he is too short to be in a basketball team but he trained himself, dedicating everything he has and proved every single person who laughed at his place by claiming the captain title in a short time. And to be honest he has no intention of letting it go soon.

He looks at Hyunwoo and signals him to go to the left, behind his back. Hyunwoo sneakily moves to his side but his opponent Kai mimics his movements as well, leaving no room for Hyunwoo to move. So Kihyun looks at his own opponent KyungSoo, he is almost at the same height as Kihyun, just slightly short. He tries to hold back Kihyun from his back and Kihyun sees an opportunity to escape his grasps. He mouths at Jooheon who is nearest to him and Jooheon understand what he is trying to say so he nods, bolting next to him and the rival who covers him- Baekhyun moves as well but doesn’t see Kyungsoo behind him so he trips and falls on him. Seeing this as a chance Kihyun moves away, blocking Hyungwon’s opponent and give him a chance to throw the ball to the Jooheon who is next to the basket and Hyungwon throws the ball slightly left but Jooheon catches and makes a slum dunk, a millisecond before the whistle blow out.

Every one jumps in theire place cheering, yelling with happiness. Kihyun’s teammates run to their captain with huge smilies on their face. Kihyun feels his heart beats crazy in his chest. He yells and hugs his teammates and they all go crazy.

They are going nationals.

 

 

*******

 

 

Kihyun zips his bag and throws it over his back. He fixes his red jacket- their school’s jacket and goes out from the locker room to meet with his teammates to celebrate their win. Just outside of the locker room somebody is leaning to the wall.

“Kihyun sunbae…” He hears that someone softly says and turns to look at the person who talks to him. It’s Im Changkyun from second grade. Kihyun sometimes sees him around the school- mostly with Hoseok because they are friends for some reason Kihyun never bothered to ask- with his big glasses and oversized shirts. The boy either sleeps or read books wherever he is. Kihyun doesn’t remember how they met-probably Hoseok introduced them- but the kid sometimes brings lunch to Hoseok and sometimes he gives to Kihyun as well. He brings energy drinks to Hoseok after excercise and offers to Kihyun too. Kihyun doesn’t know why he does that but he never questions nor returns his favors because why should he?

“Are you waiting for Hoseok hyung?” Kihyun holds the straps of his bag, rearranging it on his shoulder. He can see his friends are by the outdoor and they are looking at him.

“Yes.” Changkyun nods, rearranging his glasses on his nose. He looks funny.

“He was dressing up when I left. He’ll be out soon.” Kihyun shifts from one leg to the other.

“I guess.” The younger shows his hands in his pockets. “Congratulations by the way. It was a great move, I mean the one you did at the end.” Changkyun scratches his ash-blonde hairs which Kihyun just realized they are ash blond. Well his hair is dark purple, a result of him trying to be rebellious against his parents but Kihyun guesses that’s not why Changkyun dyed his hair. From what Kihyun knows, Changkyun’s parents are open-minded, not spider-web-brained like Kihyun’s.

“Thanks.” Kihyun nods.

“Yes.” Kid replies. It’s weird that he doesn’t look into Kihyun’s eyes. “And also… um… I baked this at my shift so, here you go.” Changkyun holds a small package on his hand and Kihyun looks at it with a confused look but since his parents taught him how to behave-very strictly if Kihyun can say- he takes the package.

“Thanks Changkyun.”

It’s dark but Kihyun thinks he sees a soft pink color splashed on the younger’s cheeks.

“It’s okay sunbae. Eat well.” Changkyun slightly bows and Kihyun throws him a smile, walking away to his friends.

“Awww what did lover boy give to you this time?” Hyungwon laughs at him of course. He always teases Kihyun by saying Changkyun has a crush on him but Kihyun never bothers to reply him because he is not into guys. You can ask his previous girlfriends.

“Shut up idiot.” He throws an annoying look to the tall one and leaves him there laughing to go to the restaurant.

 

 

*******

 

 

“To our clever leader!”

“Our captain!”

“The boy who is the smartest of all!”

Kihyun laughs at his teammates’ words as they clash their beers. He throws a piece of chicken in his mouth and eats it with a great pleasure because victory never taste so good.

“I want to eat something sweet.” Hyunwoo sighs, looking at all the salty foods on the table.

“Hey Kihyun!” Hyungwon calls him from the end of the table.

“What?” Kihyun takes a sip from his beer and it slowly goes down.

“Hyunwoo wants something sweet.”

“What the fuck should I do?”

“Give him the lover boy’s cookies.” Hyungwon shows Kihyun’s backpack with his chin.

Kihyun blinks a few times processing what his friend said because beer made him go a little bit dizzy. He remembers Changkyun giving him something- he checked it later and saw they were cookies. Kihyun takes the package from his bag and throws it to Hyunwoo who waits open armed.

“Who is that lover boy?” He opens the bag.

Hyungwon giggles and shows Kihyun. “A sophmore who is whipped for Kihyun. He is always like ‘Oh Kihyun sunbae you are amazing’ or ‘Oh I love how you throw the balls!’ I bet he wants you to throw him the balls.” He smirks as Kihyun almost chokes on his drink. He spills his drink on his face.

“Shut the fuck up asshole.” He wipes his chin with a tissue and contemplates if he should throw the knife he is holding to Hyungwon.

“Oh my god…” Hyunwoo hums in pleasure. He throws another cookie in his mouth. “Oh my god these are amazing.”

“You know he always go crazy when I talk with him like this.” Hyungwon nudges Hyunwoo who already eats the last cookie. Kihyun feels bitter about not tasting it because he wonders about them now.

“What?” Hyunwoo asks the tall one next to him.

“I’m saying our Kihyunnie over there goes crazy when I talk about lover boy.”

Hyunwoo takes a sip from his beer. “Well Kihyun if you are not interested in him, I can take him because this cookies are heaven.”

“No no.” Hyungwon chuckles, hitting Hyunwoo’s biceps. “He doesn’t even care about the boy. He always ignores him.

“I guess he is afraid of him.” Yoongi comments from the other side and laughs as well.

Kihyun’s blood boil inside his veins and if he could, he would harvest a fireball and throw it to that idiots across him.

“Kihyun afraids someone huh? Our fearless leader?” Hyunwoo joins the giggling duo.

Kihyun throws them a lettuce, Hyunwoo catches and eats that too before it lands on Jooheon’s sleeping face. That boy can’t handle the alcohol well.

“Shut up. I’m not afraid of him.”

“Yes you are. Do you know why? Because you know he likes you. And sinc you are a homophobic little shit you always ignore him. I bet you’d throw up even if he touches you.”

Kihyun clenches his chin. “I’m not. Stop talking crap you midget.”

“We are at the same height you moron.” Yoongi snorts.

“Well if you are not than prove it.” Hyungwon shrugs his shoulders.

“What?” Kihyun blinks. He may have drink too much. His friends definitely drank too much.

“Yeah prove it.” Hyunwoo takes a bite from his chicken.

“How?” Kihyun asks confused.

“Sleep with him.”

“What?”

“I dare you to sleep with him Kihyun. Prove that you are not what I just said. You always teased me for liking boys so this is my revenge. Prove that you are not an asshole.” Yoongi tilts his head but Kihyun can see the dare in his eyes.

Kihyun’s mind go hazy. He can’t think straight and being drunk definitely affects him. Sleeping with a boy? Hell no. He was raised up in a conservative family and community. In his neighborhood everybody shamed homosexual relationships and his family drilled in his brain that it’s not normal, he should never even consider this as an option. So when Kihyun came to a school out of his neighborhood, he found things odd in here. Still he is definitely not into guys but he sees them around and laughs at them because that’s what he’s been told to do. He laughed at Jimin and Yoongi many times too, he still does. So he can understand why Yoongi comes up with this dare.

Kihyun can feel every team members eyes on him.

“Besides it shouldn’t be that hard since the boy is ready to lose his pants whenever you are in the room.” Hyungwon finishes his drink, trying to hide his smile.

His honour is at stake. His teammates respect, his reputation, everything he built up can go down with his one word.

He can’t allow that.

“Fine.”

 

 

*******

 

 

“So tonight’s the night?” Hyungwon leans on the locker next to Kihyun’s. Kihyun throws him a side eye and with a bit of force, closes his locker.

“Are you ready? Do you need any advice?”

Kihyun shoves his friend away and smirks when he sees his one-night-stand turning the corner. He shakes his head to Hyungwon and winks.

“You will be sorry for calling me coward.”

He slowly approaches the younger who is walking with a book in his hand and stops in front of him purposely so the younger doesn’t see he is there and bumps him. Despite they are at the same height, Changkyun is a little bit slimmer than Kihyun because Kihyun is a sportsman but he is not that buff kind too. He is not built up like Hyunwoo but his body is strong enough for Changkyun to stumble and Kihyun takes it as a chance and catches him.

He can see the younger’s cheeks getting slightly pink with this small gesture and high-fives himself in his mind.

Easy cake.

The younger quickly straightens up and holds his book firmly in his hand.

“I’m sorry sunbae. I didn’t see you.” He smiles.

Kihyun shakes his head. “It’s okay Changkyun-ah.”

He can see the younger’s eyes light up when Kihyun say his name.

He puts his plan in motion.

“Are you coming to the party?” Kihyun asks, tilting his head.

“What party?”

“You know our victory party. At my house, tonight. I’d like to see you there.” Kihyun cards the boy’s blonde locks like it’s a thing he always do and ignores the tingles on his fingertips.

“Um… I’d never gone to a party. I’m always so busy.”

“I know.” Kihyun takes a step towards him and he can swear the younger stopped breathing.

“But it’s my party and as I said, I really want you to come.” He throws him a smile, the best one he can do to swoon the younger and apparently it works because he nods slowly.

He looks like a puppy.

“Okay than. See you tonight.” Kihyun winks and turns back to his friends- Yoongi joined Hyungwon while Kihyun was talking with Changkyun- who watched the whole thing.

“Wow I’m impressed.” Yoongi says with a sly smile.

Kihyun deadpans. “Wow you will be sorry.”

 

 

*******

 

 

The night comes and Kihyun is restless because no matter how hard he tries he can’t ignore the fact that he will sleep with a boy.

A boy.

He has zero experience in that area. He watched all the gay porns and movies he can find. He searched it online and learned a lot of things he didn’t know. He bought condoms and lube ‘cause apperantly he will need them. Time passed and his friends came and all the other people he invited to the party.

Kihyun made a plan for the night. He and his teammates made a deal. When Changkyun arrives and Kihyun takes him to his room they will clear the house because there is no way that Kihyun will sleep with the boy in a house full of people. Yes he made a bet with his teammates but he trusts them with his life, not these other people he doesn’t even know their names.

Once again Kihyun thanks his stars for his family giving him a house that he can live alone.

When Changkyun comes with Hoseok, Kihyun greets them with a big smile. The younger wears a light pink sweatshirt and dark jeans with no glasses, he is a tad different from how Kihyun always sees him. Kihyun can say he is a bit impressed.

His other teammates separate Changkyun and Hoseok because they know the elder won’t let Kihyun swoon Changkyun’s feet. They take Hoseok to the beerpong game and get him drunk there.

Kihyun on the other hand quickly gives a drink to younger and takes one to himself as well to ease his nervousness. Changkyun doesn’t drink that much but it’s okay, Kihyun knows he can get into his pants without getting him drunk besides sleeping someone who is not conscious is a dick move.

The night rolls and party goes on, Kihyun always sticks around Changkyun. He dances with him, makes jokes to blush his cheeks, occasionally touches his face or hands or thighs or anywhere he can find.

When they are tired from dancing Changkyun wants to drink some water because he’s been dancing for an hour. Kihyun shows him the kitchen and surprisingly no one is there. He gives a glass of water to the younger who downs it in one go but his hand slip and a few drops slide down his chin.

Kihyun smiles softly and touches the younger boy’s chin, wiping the drops but he doesn’t take his hand back, instead he holds the other’s chin.

“You know Changkyun I’ve been watching you.” He says with an alluring voice.

“Yeah?” The younger shivers.

Kihyun can see the shock on the younger’s face when he takes a step into his space and gets more close to his face.

“I wanna kiss you.” He looks at the younger. “Can I?”

Changkyun looks at him with a puzzled face but he nods- of course he nods.

Kihyun tries to imagine like he is eating a pineapple when his lips touch on younger’s. He doesn’t feel much except the warmness coming from the other’s lips. The taste of cheap beer is there but also something else too, cherry maybe. It’s not bad. He is not throwing up. So he can finish this bet.

He smiles into kiss and leans in more, biting the younger’s bottom lip and Changkyun let’s out a whine- the kind that gives Kihyun goosebumps. He breaks the kiss due to lack of oxygen and looks at the boy who opens his eyes in disbelief.

“Come with me.” He takes the younger’s hand and leads them to his room upstairs. He can faintly hear Hyungwon telling people that party is over in that loud music.

He opens the door of his room and waits for the other one to get in. Changkyun looks hesitant, he glances inside the room. Kihyun should do something quick so he decides to kiss the boy again.

He tugs the boy and kiss Changkyun softly, pushing him inside slowly. He closes the door with his foot as he kiss the boy until his back hits the bed. Changkyun stops like he just woke up from some sort of dream and panics.

“I- I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s gotten into me…”

Kihyun places another kiss. Somehow he can’t stop.

“I gotta find Hoseok hyung—“ His eyelids flutter with Kihyun’s pecks on his lips.

“I want you Changkyun.”

“But I- I…” The younger stutter and gasps when Kihyun throws his hands under his shirt.

“Hmm…” Kihyun kisses Changkyun’s neck and the moan escaping from the younger’s lips directly goes to his dick. “Trust me.”

Changkyun slowly nods and Kihyun pushes him on the bed. The younger sits and throws his hands around Kihyun who nibbles with his neck and caress his sides with his hands. Kihyun tugs his sweater and Changkyun let’s him take it off.

Kihyun always sees his friends shirtless, naked. Hyunwoo has enormous muscles and Jooheon has good thighs but still he feels a heat wave clawing inside his chest at the sight of Changkyun’s milky skin. It’s nothing special, there is not a single ounce of muscle but still he finds it beautiful. Maybe he is tired of seeing all those shaped bodies after all.

He throws his shirt as well before leaning in and trailing down kisses from younger’s neck to his collarbone. It’s soft and salty- and weird. He lays down the younger and gets on top of him, straddling his legs.

He tries to remember the porns he watched so he palms the younger’s pants and feels how hard he is already. What surprises Kihyun the most is how hard _he is._ The alcohol must have made him more sensitive.

He leans in and bites the younger’s lower abdomen and gets a delightful moan in return, knowing that he is doing things right. It’s not that Kihyun doesn’t know how to have sex with someone, he just doesn’t know how to have sex with a boy. But it’s not that big deal too. He watched the movies, he knows the basics after all.

So he decides to go with the flow, improvise.

Kihyun pulls the younger’s pants with his underwear. His cock is huge and smooth-something he didn’t expect, Kihyun grabs it immediately pumping with his hand. He leans in, continuing to place pecks on the other’s skin.

“Sunbae.” Changkyun let’s out a shaky breath when Kihyun nibbles with the skin under his ribs.

“Hm?”

Kihyun kisses the younger’s chest, leaving purple and pink bruises there. He continues to palm the other ones cock and feel his hot breath on his shoulders.

The younger one hiss with his movements, grabbing the elders shoulders and moves against his palm.

“Ah sunbae- I’m- It’s too much—“

Kihyun silences him by grabbing his lips in a hot kiss, feeling the other one melt in his arms. He bites the other’s bottom lip, sucking it until Changkyun opens his lips to moan so he slips his tongue in the other one’s mouth. It’s hot and sticky, makes Kihyun feel hot.

He feels a bolt in his spine when the younger moves his hand to Kihyun’s dick and palms it like he did. He kisses the other more as he move his hands and breathes in his mouth, feeling his pants incredibly tight. He quickly removes his pants and underwear too.

He lies upon the other one again, taking the lube and condom from the place he did hide earlier.

“Hey…” He kisses the other one’s forehead- he doesn’t know why. “Do you trust me?”

The younger bites his swollen bottom lip and looks at the stuff in Kihyun’s hand for a second.

“Trust me.” Kihyun whispers and kisses him, freeing his bottom lips from his teeth and smile internally when the other nods slowly.

He slicks his fingers with lube and moves his hand down, finding the other one’s hole.

“Take a deep breath and don’t get tense okay?”

The younger nods and Kihyun slowly pushes his finger, feeling the tight muscles sucking his finger in. Despite what he said Changkyun tenses up a little due to pain.

“Kihyun—“ The other one breathes out in a whisper.

“Relax for me. It’s okay.” Kihyun reaches and kisses the other to take his mind off of the pain. “You will feel better in a minute.” At least that’s what wikipedia says.

He doesn’t know where this sudden sympathy comes from but he doesn’t want the other one suffer either. He is not that maniac so Kihyun uses his other hand to stroke the younger’s member to help him calm down. Soon he relaxes and Kihyun moves his finger easily. When he feels one is not enough he adds another one as well and opens the other, curling his fingers hitting his tight walls.

He knows he found the right spot when he twists his fingers slightly to the left because the younger let’s out a scream and moans louder.

“Oh my god… I can’t—Please-“ Changkyun grasps his hairs, tugging him towards himself and Kihyun’s lips crash on his pink ones. It feels so natural to kiss him, moving his lips with the younger’s soft ones are easy. This whole thing goes more simple than Kihyun thinks.

“Stop doing that.” Changkyun whispers to his lips. He looks at Kihyun’s eyes and Kihyun realize how beautiful their color are. They are like melted chocolate covered with glitter. It’s like a deep sea, sucking Kihyun into it’s whirlwind.

“I want you.” Changkyun says and Kihyun feels a tug inside his chests. They are alone in this room, in this house. They are intimate so intimate and the words spilling from the younger’s lips sounds real. So real.

So for a second Kihyun considers what he is doing but his chain of thoughts break with the younger’s kiss. He takes out his fingers and gets up, rolling a condom on his dick and cover it with lube. He places his elbows on Changkyun’s side and aligns himself.

“Okay.” Changkyun says and Kihyun slowly pushes in. The sensation, the feeling it’s all too much. His heart pounds crazy, his mind go blank for a second.

“Oh my god this is so good.” He lets out a growl.

To be honest Kihyun didn’t expect it to be so overwhelming. He thought people were making it fancy but when he is inside Changkyun he can’t define the feeling that rises up until the tip of his tongue.

Changkyun is hot, tight and wild.

His chest pressed on Changkyun’s and it gets warmer. Kihyun doesn’t know whose heart beats faster, he lost the track. He doesn’t know what he feels, how much he feels, how he feels.

He just feels.

Like an open wound.

He has to get use to this sensation so he just drops himself on Changkyun and waits. He tries to catch his breath for a few minutes and when Changkyun taps his shoulder to let him know he is adjusted, he starts to move.

Kihyun feels like he is riding a rollercoaster.

It’s something Kihyun never felt. There is nothing he can compare to this. There is no word he can use to explain what’s going on with his body. He just feels burns at every place Changkyun touch. Like all his nerves are open, they are out there and each one of them react Changkyun’s every touch.

The younger is a mess too. He places small feathery kisses on Kihyun’s cheeks, neck, anywhere he can find. It’s sweet and sad. He squirms with Kihyun’s every move, biting Kihyun’s left shoulder enough to hurt but not in an unpleasent way.

Everything feels too much. It’s just too much. Kihyun needs a release and he can feel with his every move, something builds up inside. He hides his face into younger’s neck as he rolls his hips. Changkyun smells divine, a familiar scent. Peach and flowers maybe.

Kihyun moves his hip with more force. He pounds inside the younger relentlessly. He doesn’t care about anything, it’s just him and Changkyun now.

He presses his lips on the younger’s neck, sucking at the place he can feel his pulse. It’s beating without a break, two times at a millisecond maybe. In the amidst of his raw emotions, Kihyun feels proud for making the younger’s heart go this wild. He must have like Kihyun a lot.

“Kihyun- I’m.. I’m close-“ The younger gasps into his ear with moans and Kihyun knows he won’t last long too. He grabs the younger’s cock stroking it by matching his rythm and when he feels his orgazm hit, he captures younger’s lips, swallowing every beautiful moan spilling from his lips in a breathless kiss.

Everything goes white and silent for a minute. He needs a few minutes to live his orgasm- his best orgasm Kihyun can say.

He carefully slips out of the younger, tying the condom and throwing it into bin. He looks at the younger who lies on the bed, eyes half closed, bare, chest crowned with Kihyun’s traces and Kihyun feels a tug in his heart.

It’s weird, he never felt this way before. Changkyun was just a normal person to him but now he wants to take another kiss. Maybe trail pecks down to his torso but this is more weird because his mission is completed. He did his part and there is no more skin ship needed. Still, he takes a few wet wipes- watching gay porn have benefits- and cleans up younger’s chest, trying not to touch him much.

He throws the wipes into the bin and make younger wear his underwear. He pulls his own too and covers the other one with blanket because he will not kick him five minutes after they have sex. Maybe a few hours later.

“Thank you. I can’t move. Feeling like jelly.” Changkyun chuckles, his cheeks are pink and eyes are hazy. He snuggles to Kihyun’s side and falls a sleep in a few seconds.

Kihyun looks at the boy next to him for a while. He feels a sting, maybe because of that all the rush. Changkyun looks so much younger when he sleeps. He is a beautiful boy, Kihyun wonders why he haven’t find anyone to be with him.

He slowly drifts off too.

And a small voice inside his head tells him to shut up.

 

******* 

 

“Holy shit!” Hyunwoo gets closer to Kihyun who shows his phone- a photo to be exact- to his teammates.

“You really did sleep with him. Fuck!” Hyungwon laughs, hitting Yoongi’s thighs.

“I told you, you would be sorry.” Kihyun smirks at them.

“What did you say to him after?” Yoongi takes a sip from his soda and swats Hyungwon’s hand away.

Kihyun shrugs his shoulders. “It was a one time thing. He knows that.”

He doesn’t tell them that they fall asleep until the morning and Kihyun woke up with a Changkyun sleeping peacefully inside his arms. He doesn’t know why he did that but he stole a kiss from the younger’s lips before he took a picture of them to present his friends as a proof.

Jooheon who sits on the grass, shakes his head in disapproval. “Still, it’s clear that he liked you for a long time hyung. This stupid bet of yours was something I didn’t approve.”

Hyungwon wraps his arms around the younger. “Come on Jooheon! It was fun seeing him get more feisty than usual.”

The younger shrugs him off from his shoulders and shakes his head again.

“What about Hoseok hyung? What if he _learns_?”

Yoongi lifts his eyebrows. “I don’t think he will tell Hoseok. Even if he does, you can say you just fooled around.”

“Anyway since you proved yourself, we can all go have a lunch.” Hyunwoo gets up from his place on the bank.

The others get up as well, taking their bags from the ground.

“Guys we need to be ready for training. You know nationals are coming.” Kihyun throws his phone in his pocket.

“You can delete that photo Kihyun. You proved your point after all.” Yoongi says, throwing his empty soda can into the trash bin. He joins the others who start to walk.

“Yeah.” Kihyun takes out his phone and looks at the picture. It’s a bit blurred because Kihyun took it in a hurry but still he can see the peaceful expression on the younger’s face.

It’s soft.

And a warm feeling spreads inside Kihyun’s chest.

It must be the weather.

“Are you coming?” Hyungwon calls from the distance.

Kihyun locks the phone, throwing it inside his pocket.

He will delete the photo later.

 

 

 

 


	2. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you like this chapter!! It was so fun to write really!  
> Thank you for the comments and kudos!  
> I love talking with you and hear your thoughts~~~~~
> 
> Anyway have fun!!!

It’s been an exhausting training. Every team member in the locker room sigh, groan with pain and of course everybody curse at Kihyun for making them work out so much but captain doesn’t even care about what they think. They have a national game to play and everybody has to be on shape. They have to be like foxes on the court. Kihyun didn’t work hard this much to let these guys ruin everything.

He is amazing lately. He feels more focused on his goals and achievements. He knows what he wants to do and how he wants to do it. It’s like a switch flipped in his mind and everything is out there within his reach.

But also there is some sort of a longing. Everything is going great so he doesn’t know why he feels like that. He just feels.

Kihyun pulls his shorts on and dries his bare chest with a towel. He takes his shirt from his bag with aching muscles.

“Hoseok hyung!” Kihyun hears a voice calling from the distance and snaps his head to it’s owner. Changkyun is standing next to Hoseok with two bottles of energy juice. He talks with his friend with a stupidly cute smile on his face when his eyes meet with Kihyun’s but he immediately turns his look away with a blush. Kihyun smirks at the boy’s behaviour, shaking his head slowly. He watches how hard Changkyun tries to not look into his way as he places the shirt back inside his bag and lean to the locker, arms crossed watching the younger.

After their night together a week ago, Kihyun was stressed about how Changkyun will pursue him and try to do that again but it didn’t happen. The younger acted like everything was just a normal thing. Kihyun thought he would be more sensitive but he wasn’t and Kihyun find it odd. He still have fireworks in his eyes when he sees Kihyun and that stupid smile on his face but that’s it. He doesn’t do anything. Kihyun doesn’t do anything either. He ignores the younger on the halls and doesn’t thank him fort he meals as always. But some days Kihyun catches himself watching him go and sit with his friend- Minhyuk during lunch break. There is a weird feeling he has when he sees the younger smile. It’s hidden but it’s there. Kihyun sees the other one falling asleep in the library, faced buried in a book and his glasses looks crooked. Kihyun may tell the librarian to wake him up or put some blanket over him. It’s not because he cared. It’s because he is interesting. Changkyun is interesting.

Just like he is now. It’s fun to see him get all worked up with just one sight of Kihyun’s top naked. He looks cute.

Changkyun blinks away and continues to talk with Hoseok who throws his shirt over his head and gives him the bottle. Hoseok goes inside the bathroom to throw his towel into the laundry and Changkyun just stands there awkwardly with the other bottle in his hand. He scratches his head and looks at it like he doesn’t know what to do with it. It’s like watching a small puppy that doesn’t know which way to go, like he is confused.

It’s adorable.

But on the other hand Kihyun knows who is the owner of the extra juice so why shouldn’t he go and get it? Right?

He straightens his back, showing his chest and abs more. He casually starts to walk next to the red-faced boy but stops when a teammate- Cory grabs the bottle from Changkyun’s hand. Changkyun surprises with the sudden action and looks at him with big eyes.

“Hey Changkyun!” Cory opens the bottle and takes a sip. “Mind if I take this?”

Changkyun’s eyes dart to Kihyun’s for a second like he doesn’t know what to do then they lay on Cory’s. He slowly nodds. It’s useless to say no since Cory already took the bottle. There is nothing Changkyun can do about it but it’s a problem because it was Kihyun’s bottle. And nobody can take Kihyun’s things.

Kihyun realizes he is almost about to go there and snatch the bottle from Cory but he stops himself because it’s just a bottle, right?

“Say Changkyun…” Cory shifts his position, now standing right between Changkyun and Kihyun. He blocks his vision so Kihyun can’t see him. It’s funny though why should Kihyun know what they are talking? He doesn’t care about the boy. Still, a nervous need of knowing pushes him to listen what Cory has to say.

Cory leans to the locker with his elbow and casually touch Changkyun’s hair like he is fixing it. Kihyun can see that and he feels- disturbed. Why is he touching Changkyun’s hair? It was nice already. What’s the point of that, he thinks.

“I have a party this friday at my house. And I want you to come.” Kihyun hears Cory’s words among the other boys chats. He repeats the words inside his head. Party? What party? And most importantly why the hell Cory invites Changkyun there? What- What the fuck is he trying to?

What is he--

Oh.

_Oh._

Kihyun understands what he is trying to do. He fucking knows. Cory is trying to seduce Changkyun. His gestures, his words are exactly what Kihyun said or did. He feels a red flame starting at the pit of his stomach. There is a tug in there, pulling Kihyun towards to the standing duo. He almost go there and interfere but stops in his track when he sees Hoseok coming back from the shower stalls.

Kihyun stands there, clenching his jaw breathing through nose. Cory moves away to make a space for Hoseok and with that Kihyun can see Changkyun who has a slight pink on his cheeks and that makes him even more angry. What the fuck is there to blush about?

“Then I’ll see you there.” Cory leaves.

Hoseok zips his pack and throws his hand to Changkyun’s shoulder who doesn’t lift his eyes up from the ground and pull the boy next to him, exiting the room.

Kihyun let’s out a huff placing his hands on his hips. He wants to find Cory and talk to him about the heck he is trying to do. He turns to take his shirt from the bag, seeing Yoongi stands there.

“What?” He asks.

Yoongi lifts his eyebrows. “What?” he repeats.

“Do you know Cory just invited Changkyun to that stupid party he is hosting at friday?” Kihyun throws his shirt over his head and wears it a bit harsh.

“So? What about it?” Yoongi shrugs, hands inside his pocket.

“He will try to sleep with the kid, Suga.”

“So? What about it?” Yoongi shrugs again, annoying Kihyun.

“Are you gonna repeat that every time I say something or should I just not waste my breath anymore?” Kihyun throws him an angry look as he gulps down his water.

“So? What about it?” Yoongi repeats but he quickly adds, knowing it’s enough for tease. “You said that it didn’t matter to you. So what now? Is he just yours or something?”

“No.. No but—“ Kihyun stutters.

“It was a thing to prove you are not an asshole, it was a stupid bet but we did it. It didn’t mean anything to you. So why hold him from seeing or dating others? He is not exclusive to you.”

Kihyun holds the bottle inside his hand, hard. Yoongi is right, it didn’t mean anything. It shouldn’t mean anything. He doesn’t care. Changkyun can do whatever the fuck he wants.

“I don’t care.” He says, zipping his bag and wearing his jacket on.

“Yeah you shouldn’t.” Yoongi says.

“I don’t.” Kihyun repeats again and leaves the room.

 

 

********

 

 

“Pass me the ball!” Hyungwon yells from the left and Hoseok looks at him, evaluating his options. He takes another glance at the Yoongi who blocks him from getting further. Kihyun can see he is hesitant and he considers of going to the basket himself but in his moment of internal debate, Hyunwoo steals the ball from Hoseok’s grasp and goes to the basket himself but Kihyun already saw him moving and ready to stop him before he can reach the basket. He comes from behind and steals the ball when Hyunwoo bounce it as he goes forward. Kihyun takes a few steps, dodging Namjoon by acting that he will go the right but he goes left and throws the ball to Jooheon who is next to the basket and they score. Jooheon runs to him with a happy face and high-fives the boy.

The training is over and Kihyun feels proud more than ever. He is having a blast lately, he aces every move and he can see the faults and voids in the court. He thinks quick and acts on his hunches with knowledge. His teammates can see the change as well.

As always they don’t just stop and not tease him.

“Wow Kihyun you are wild today. Again.” Yoongi stretches his arms next to Kihyun who grabs his bottle and takes a sip from it.

“He let off some steam a few days ago. He is not a virgin anymore. Maybe that’s why.” Hyungwon grins wiping his sweat to his shirt.

Kihyun throws him some water with an annoyed look. “Shut up, I was never a virgin.”

Hyungwon looks at him with a bored look for a second. That’s his what the fuck are you doing face that everybody ignore.

“You were guy-virgin. And now you are not.” Hyungwon wipes away the water Kihyun did throw.

Kihyun takes a deep breath. His moment of joy is replacing with anger bit by bit.

“What about when you were 12?” Jooheon asks a few seconds later with a confused look.

“No it should be ‘What about last week?’ Joohoney.” Hyungwon tells with a grin. He likes pushing Kihyun’s buttons for some reason Kihyun can’t understand.

“Oh stop please.” Kihyun punches Hyungwon’s chest slightly and the other acts like he is hurt.

"Come on guys don't tease the kid." Hyunwoo says.

The other members chuckle at the small argument going in the room.

“Who is not a guy-virgin anymore?” Hoseok comes with a smile and Kihyun feels like somebody did throw him a bucket of cold water.

“Kihyun hyung.” Jooheon replies without thinking and he covers his mouth with his hand when he realizes what he did. Kihyun turns to him with a clenched chin.

Hoseok’s eyes are wide with surprise. “Wow Kihyun?” He checks him out and Kihyun feels an urge to hide under a rock. Like now. “I thought you weren’t into guys.”

Kihyun swallows hardly knowing if he say the wrong thing, he will fuck up. “I’m not hyung. It was a one time thing.”

Hoseok purses his lips and nods. “An experiment you say. Poor guy though.”

“Oh no hyung it was a bet.” Cory comes next to them, drying his hair with a towel.

Yoongi next to him hits his head knowing Hoseok doesn’t look at that way. “What are you trying to do, be a dick?” Kihyun hears him mutter.

“Bet?” Hoseok looks at Kihyun, surprised.

“It was a stupid thing hyung. No need to mention.” Kihyun sweats a lot but thanks to his luck they just finished their training and Hoseok can’t understand he is nervous. He can fuck up in a minute if somebody says a wrong word.

“Well I didn’t expect this from you but I’m in no position to judge.” Hoseok shrugs and Kihyun feels a little at ease. “Still I hope you were nice to the guy.”

“Oh he was hyung.” Cory replies, earning another smack from Hyungwon who stands next to him.

“Okay then.” Hoseok eyes them and leaves to take a shower.

When he is out of sight, Hyungwon quickly smacks on Cory’s head again. “What the fuck? Why did you say that? Besides who told you that?”

“What?” Cory shrugs his shoulders like it’s nothing. “Jooheon did.”

Kihyun turns to look at the younger who looks like he is scared.

“We were just talking and you know I’m not good at keeping secrets and I was too pressured. You know how I get all mouthy before exams and next week is gonna be crazy. We have exams and this trainings are killing me also. I’m sorry.” He ducks his head, hoping to get away with what he did. Kihyun takes a deep breath to calm himself down. He will talk with Jooheon later.

“It’s nice to see you find a hole to put your dick in hyung. Maybe finally you won’t be such a stuck up.” Cory laughs with a careless face.

Kihyun can’t believe his attitude. This guy is always a prick. He never listens Kihyun when they are in the game, act selfish and tries to go the basket himself. Kihyun finds himself scolding him a lot but he doesn’t care about what kind of a person he is outside the court. Except today. He now wants to punch the guy and contemplates about kicking him out off the room. But Kihyun being Kihyun, he knows he has to hold his posture as the captain of the group. He can’t let any argument happen even if it’s because of himself.

“Are you trying to be the asshole you always are or is there another reason man?” Hyungwon says angrily.

“Why are you all so worked up?” Cory tongues his cheek. It’s clear that he is annoyed.“You were all cool with it five minutes ago. You were all just joking how he let off some steam. What’s the difference of me joking about it?”

“It’s because we were joking among ourselves. What you are trying to do is not joking. You are trying to get us killed by Hoseok hyung’s muscles.” Yoongi smacks his shoulder.

“If he learns about Changkyun…” Jooehon starts.

“What ‘bout it?” Cory shrugs again and looks at Kihyun. “Kihyun hyung fucked him so what? It’s obvious that he will sleep with anyone. He is just a slut—“ He can’t finish his words because Kihyun tackles him to the ground. It’s all happen in a flash of moment. One minute Kihyun is clenching his fists to stay clear and the next minute he is on the younger who is shocked by his speed. He punches a fist to Cory’s chest, knowing it will leave him breathless. He grabs the boy’s shirt with one hand and draw his the other hand to the air but he can’t move it because Jooheon holds his wrist.

“Hyung calm down!” Kihyun frees himself from him and his fist meet with Cory’s stupid face.

“Kihyun stop that!” Yoongi tries to interfere but Kihyun pushes him away. Cory tries to move away, get out of Kihyun’s graps but he can’t because the other one doesn’t let him.

“Let me go hyung what the fuck?” He tries to push. Kihyun punches his face again, this time with a little more force. 

He grabs Cory’s shirt with both of his hands and brings his face close. His eyes are on fire and Kihyun can see his expression reflecting from the younger’s scared eyes. He doesn’t care.

“If you ever talk like that again, I will fucking kill you.”

His voice is so stern and icy. Everyone in the room stands where they are. They just can’t move because they are afraid to do anything. Cory looks at the boys around him but understands they are sided with Kihyun. He gives up with a nod and everyone knows it’s a half-hearted move.

“I will kill you.” Kihyun repeats again and release his grasp. He gets up shoving Hyungwon away who is on his way and goes to the showers.

He takes a few steps to calm himself down, the adrenaline he felt moments ago slowly fades as he strips his clothes and gets under the hot water. He looks at his knuckles get bruised and washes the fresh blood away. He doesn’t know why he did that. Kihyun doesn’t know what gotten into him. He was fine when they joked about his thing but he felt his blood boil when Cory talked about Changkyun like he is some sort of a prey. It made Kihyun angry because he wasn’t. He isn’t. He was just stupidly innocent and terribly in love. Kihyun was lucky to do this bet because he knew the boy liked him. Yes he slept with him but that doesn’t mean he will sleep with anyone who asks. Right?

Kihyun was special. He knew he was special. He understood he was special when Changkyun snuggled next to his side after the sex. He could go but he didn’t. He could just pack his things and leave without taking a glance but he stayed.

He stayed.

And Kihyun stayed too.

Kihyun doesn’t talk with anyone about it, he doesn’t say this but he can’t stop thinking about that night. It was such a different experience. He thought he can’t ever feel like this, he didn’t even know the concept of feeling this perfect. He never felt so amazing in his life. It was like he was just a small sand in the universe and than he could see the stars and galaxies that lies beyond him. With every movement he felt a supernova unravel before his eyes, with every kiss he felt hotter than fireplace he used when it’s cold. Changkyun’s touches were too soft. His every small peck was telling how much he adored Kihyun and how much he cared. It was obvious that he cared. And he loved.

Kihyun never felt so loved.

Maybe that’s why he can’t stop thinking about that night. Kihyun always thinks that he is unimportant. He was always second at somethings. In his family, in his school, even in his own life. Nobody put him first. He had to fight whatever he wanted to have. And he did fight. He fought with his family to have a separate life, he fought his way to be in the basketball team, he fought to take over the captain title. Kihyun is a fighter but the thing is, the affection Changkyun gave to him was so pure. Kihyun didn’t have to fight for that. It was so effortless to have it. Because Changkyun is so generous. He always cared for Kihyun and never asked anything in return.

Maybe that’s what his problem is. He gives too much from himself without asking anything back. He could be selfish and scold Kihyun for pushing him to have sex with him but he didn’t do that. He could stop smiling at him with shining eyes whenever he sees Kihyun in the halls even when the elder acts like he doesn’t see him and walk pass by. He doesn’t have to bring extra sandwiches with him but still, he does. Because that’s how he is. He is that kind of a person. He gives and gives until there is nothing left.

And Kihyun is demanding. He wants it. He wants to have whatever Changkyun gives. He knows that he was special to Changkyun, that night was special.

Kihyun never felt so special in his life. Not like this. And he wants to feel that again. He has to feel that again. He _needs_ to feel that again. Because he is demanding.

He will fight his way. Just like how he always did.

 

*******

 

“I thought you guys are not in good terms.” Namjoon passes a drink to Kihyun who stands at the corner at Cory’s party. He wears a maroon shirt and black jeans, his hair is slicked back showing his deadly forehead. He decided to come to the party with his best look and it worked because he turned down 5 girls and 3 boys since he arrived. And he arrived an hour ago.

Kihyun takes a sip from his drink. “We are not but the guys wanted me here to melt the ice or whatever.”

“Well…” Namjoon takes a sip too. “If you say so.” He glances around the room at the people who dance like crazy.

Kihyun throws him an eye but doesn’t comment on it.

Thirty minutes later Hoseok comes with Changkyun who wears a black knit sweater that’s obviously a size big for him and a pair of maroon pants. He looks soft and sexy at the same time because every time he moves his sweater slips from one of his shoulders and no matter how quickly he fixes it, Kihyun can see his collar bones. What the fuck is he trying to do really? Kihyun wonders if he dressed up like this on purpose or is he just ignorant enough to not care?

Because Kihyun can see Cory’s every movement. He is acting like a predator. Always around Changkyun, he jokes and flirts with him. Seriously how can Changkyun not see this?

Cory smiles like a lion, waiting to rip it’s prey in the best time possible and Changkyun just stands there smiling back at him. Kihyun can’t believe how naive he is. Changkyun doesn’t know what kind of a dick Cory is actually. Kihyun knows. He knows that Cory dated with a lot of girls and boys before. He knows that Cory teased them, paved his way with a sweet talk and after he is done with them he just passed on to the next person. That’s what he is. He is a bad person. Kihyun doesn’t say he is better but if he is 3 in the scale of not being an asshole then Cory is minus 5. Nonetheless Changkyun deserves better.

He finishes his drink and takes another one quickly taking a sip without tearing his eyes apart from giggling Changkyun.

“That’s jealousy.” Yoongi says next to him. Kihyun looks at him but Yoongi is talking with someone else so Kihyun can’t understand he said those words to who.

For a while Kihyun waits. He waits for the right time.

When Cory moves away to get another drink, Kihyun moves up like a bolt and grabs Changkyun’s elbow with a bit of force. The younger looks at him with unfocused eyes. Before he can say anything Kihyun pulls him to the bathroom at the end of the hall and shoves him inside. He locks the door behind them and turns back with anger.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” He asks.

Changkyun blinks his eyes a few times. “What?" He tries to open his eyes. "He said you would be here…” The younger mutters.

Kihyun stops for a second trying to understand what he said but gets angrier when he sees the younger sways on his feet, unable to stand properly.

“Why the fuck are you drinking everything he gave you huh?” Kihyun walks on the trembling boy. He fists and unfists his hands, not knowing what to do with them. “Are you idiot or dumb?” He asks waving his hands in the air. Changkyun grabs the sink and sits on the closed toilet seat slowly.

“Why are you getting mad at me?” The younger asks with a slurring voice. It’s clear that he is very drunk. He can’t stay focused or hold his head up. Even when he sits, he looks like he is about to fall to the ground. He is so gone. How can he not be actually? He did drink 3 cups of beer and 2 cups of blueberry punch in two hours. Kihyun doesn’t know where he knows this- Hoseok must have mentioned it- he knows the other one can’t handle alcohol very well.

He laughs nervously to the boy who tries to keep his eyes open.

“Because he is trying to get you drunk. He is trying to sleep with you! Don’t you see that?” Kihyun leans to the sink with his arms crossed. How can Changkyun be so stupid? He should be blind to not realize what’s going on around him. For all night Cory moved around Changkyun like a predator and this boy is too idiot to understand to see that he is a prey. Kihyun knows Cory and he knows his motives. It’s wrong, they are wrong, he is wrong.

Changkyun presses his head to the wall near him. He let’s out a small puff.

“Why do you care?”

Changkyun looks at the elder for a few seconds before closing his eyes and Kihyun thinks he fall asleep or something. He waits a few minutes watching the younger for him to do something but he doesn’t. Kihyun finds it odd and fascinating that he looks good despite being drunk. His cheeks are pink, the tip of his stupidly smooth nose is pink, his slightly parted lips are pink. They look soft and Kihyun knows they are soft. With the remembrance of them touching his own lips a familiar yet unfamiliar warm feeling spreads on his chest. His anger cools down for a little. He is angry still so angry but that stupid tightness he feels inside his chest somehow makes the anger crumble bit by bit.

He scrunches down next to do boy who takes shallow breaths. His blonde hair is falling on his eyes, making him cringes his nose. They must have annoy him so Kihyun holds his face with his palm and swats the locks away.

Changkyun moves his head inside his hands, he rubs his cheek inside of Kihyun’s palm like he is some kind of a cat. Kihyun blurts out a smile, he really looks like a cat, a black cat with his black sweater. A sudden affection hits Kihyun and he doesn’t know what this is. He doesn’t want to find a name and call it that either because if he gives this a name, than it is gonna be real. And Kihyun can’t accept that. He just likes this moment. Faint sound of music at the background, there is fifty other people in the house but here he is in a tiny bathroom with a boy who fall asleep because he is too drunk and he can’t say no.

When it’s about Kihyun.

Kihyun doesn’t know why he feels- okay. He is okay being here. His friends are out there having fun but he is here. And it hits him that he wants to be here. He rathers to be here than anywhere else. It’s not because he likes this bathroom or the duck patterned shower curtains, no. It’s because he is here with this kid.

Kihyun doesn’t need to name it, he will not name _it._ He will not name this stupid urge to touch the other one anytime he can find. He will just live it. He decides to live it. He _wants_ to live it. So maybe that’s why the words roll over from his tongue to the air and resonates through the walls like they are a wish, when he leans into brush his lips to the younger’s.

“Because you are mine.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Steamy steamy*
> 
> What do you think? Tell me about it^^


	3. 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys... I'm sorry for being incapable of finishing the stories at the chapter numbers I promised.  
> I know that I said this is gonna be 3 chapters but I don't want to rush things and ruin the story. I originally thought about writing approximately 5k for each 3 chapter but apparently I write a lot so I couldn't squeeze everything in this one to finalize the story.  
> I need a few more chapters. I don't know how much, 2 or 3 more probably. But of course it's up to you.  
> I can just cut it short too if you wish, just tell me what you think.
> 
> Thank you for the comments and kudos. I love when you share your thoughts & talk with me because after all I'm sharing this story with you, for you.
> 
> Have fun!!! (like Kihyun did in this chapter lol)

“Here you are!” Hyunwoo calls out with a silent but strong voice and throws himself at the chair next to Yoongi who sleeps on the table.

Jooheon who follows him pulls the chair next to Kihyun and makes a lot of noise, a lot for a library. Kihyun throws a warning look at the younger who ducks his head to hide from snickering looks from the people who study. He presses his lips together, pulls the books from his bag and puts them on the table carefully. Hyunwoo puts out his books from his bag and crosses his arms on them, putting his head on.

“I hate when you do this Hyunwoo hyung. If you are gonna sleep why did you come to the library in the first place?” Hyungwon scoffs from across the table with an annoyed look. He hates to be interrupted when he studies. On the other hand Hyunwoo doesn’t care about what he says and closes his eyes.

“Don’t you know him hyung? He is a nerd since he opened his eyes to the world. He probably knows  everything about the exam and that means more than you and me combine.” Jooheon shakes his head in a sad way. He needs to get good grades, they all need to get good grades if they want to stay in the team. That’s a rule for all of them so they all study together for their exams despite they are at different years. They are a team after all, they motivate each other.

“Your last exam is today, right hyung?” Jooheon asks Kihyun as he flips the pages. Kihyun nods without tearing his eyes from the notes he was reading.  Yoongi who naps next to him, groans due to the voices but he doesn’t open his eyes and Jooheon moves pages more slowly with an apologetic face. Kihyun is distracted by Jooheon already so he decides to have a small break. His body aches for sitting so long in the same chair.

Kihyun throws his head back, taking a deep breath and opens up his water bottle take a few sips. It’s been a hellish week for him, for the whole team actually. They had exams during day and they practiced until late nights for a week. They could handle the exams and practice if they could do them one at a time but nationals are coming and they can’t take a break. There are players from different years so it was hard to gather everyone to practice to play basketball. The pressure of the upcoming games and the exams really took a tall on everybody, Kihyun knows that but they affect Kihyun too. He is the captain after all. He feels on edge and he needs get relaxed somehow. He doesn’t know how to do that but he needs that. His mind is full with exams and game tactics, his body cries for some sleep after long trainings. He needs to find a way to let go all this tension or else he can’t be at his full force for the games.

Kihyun leans back in his chair and thinks about what he can do for that. Maybe he will go swimming at school pool or hang out with his friends. There are different opportunities for him. As he thinks about the possibilities, his eyes stuck on two figure standing side by side at the end of the room. More accurately one of them is kinda leaning above the other because the other one is relatively short. The duo moves in their place and Kihyun recognizes that the taller one is Cory with his black shirt and he has a book in his hand and the other one is Changkyun with his stupid glasses. He wears a white shirt, top two button is open. He looks at the page Cory is showing to him with focused eyes and says something to him Kihyun can’t hear from across the room but Kihyun can see how Cory puts his hand to younger’s shoulder and lean above him, too close in his personal space. Kihyun feels that already familiar burn at the deep of his stomach that he felt for the past week whenever he sees the younger around. He gets up from his place but before he can move Changkyun parts himself from Cory and nods. Cory watches him with keen eyes as the younger walks away.

“What happened hyung?” Jooheon who clasps his book in his hands asks with scary eyes. He probably thinks he annoyed Kihyun too much with the sounds and scared. Or he is just scared. That’s it.

“My back hurts because I’ve been sitting for so damn long.” Kihyun’s eyes flicker on the uniform getting lost behind the books. He clears his throat as he moves his chair slowly not to make any noise to wake Yoongi and Hyunwoo up. “I will walk a little. Also I need to check a book. You go on, I’ll be back.” He points his notebook to the younger and moves away where the other one got lost behind.

If you’d ask the biggest place in the school Kihyun would say it’s the sport hall and then the library. It’s huge, there may be thousand books. Who knows how many shelfs there are. That’s why many of the students come here to study or read or both. But it doesn’t matter for now because since it’s the last day of exams, many of the students are at home or in their dorms. Only nerds like Kihyun and the ones who decides to study at the last minutes are in the library. A light bulb flickers inside Kihyun’s brain. He didn’t think about it first but now Kihyun can see the best solution to release some pressure off from his shoulder. And for his luck that solution is a nerd too.

Kihyun spots the younger at the dark corner of the biology section where the big, thick books rests. The lightning here is not good, maybe it’s because it’s an old part of the room but it doesn’t matter, Kihyun’s eyes adjust to slight darkness in seconds. Changkyun’s round glasses are on the tip of his nose, there are half visible dark circles under his eyes and his hair is a mess. Still he looks cute when he searches the book he is looking, tracing the books with his slim fingers. He spots the book on the top shelf and tries to reach it. Kihyun leans to the shelf next to him, watching his useless attempts. Changkyun tries to reach a little, he fails but he doesn’t give up. Kihyun smirks when the boy tries to reach again and fail, again. Changkyun tiptoes, extending his arms at much as he can and he touches the book. Finally! He tries to pull it with his fingertips and book moves forward slowly.

Kihyun can’t take it anymore and he goes next to the younger, reaching for the book. When their hands touch, he ignores the electricity flows through his body by the warm fingers of Changkyun and smirks when the younger draws his hand back with big eyes. He is not taller than Changkyun, hell they are almost at the same height but since Changkyun managed to pull the book Kihyun can touch and take it easily. He grabs the book and sends a cocky smile to the younger who looks at him with a surprised expression. He stands on his feet, holding the book in his hand and turns at the younger. Kihyun realizes he cornered Changkyun between the wall, the bookshelf and himself. That somehow gives some ideas to him.

“What do we have here?” He looks at the book’s cover with a smug face. “A book about human biology. Don’t you know much about it already?” He smiles innocently, tilting his head to the side but he knows the younger understand what he implies and because of that, no matter how dark it is, he can see Changkyun blush. Oh he loves the effect he has on the younger. It somehow pushes him to do more. It’s funny actually how he behaves bolder around Changkyun. Maybe it’s because he knows the younger is melting at his every gesture, every word.

“Ye- Yeah.” The younger stutters nervously. Kihyun can swear if he presses himself on him, he can feel the other’s crazy heartbeats but then again, Changkyun can feel his crazy heartbeats too. So scratch that idea.

“Thank you sunbae.” Changkyun reaches out for the book but Kihyun holds it in the air.

“Come now. I helped you. You should help me too Changkyun. Don’t you think so?” He lifts a single eyebrow. “Are you free tonight?” He holds the younger’s wrist gently with his free hand and starts to move his thumb over the soft skin. He can faintly feel the younger’s pulse under his touch, it’s wild.

The younger blinks so fast, eyes darting to his wrist where Kihyun holds and then to Kihyun’s flamy eyes. Changkyun swallows trying to find his voice to reply him. “I.. I uh.. I actually promised…”

“You are free tonight.” Kihyun cuts his words with a nod. “You know we have a big game in the upcoming weeks and I’ve been so stressed due to my exams. I need to relax. I need help.”

“Of course. Yes sunbae whatever you say.” Changkyun nods softly. The pink tone on his cheeks are so adorable and in the poor light, they look a lot darker.

“Really?” Kihyun moves forward getting really close to Changkyun. The younger swallows and Kihyun can see his cheeks are red. He wants to kiss them to see if they are hot as they seem but more importantly Kihyun wants to taste his lips because he saw the younger eating chocolate before and he wonders how will they taste. And nothing stops him now to be honest. They are alone at the far end of the library. It’s dark, no one can see them so why shouldn’t he just do what he wants? Besides he needs to feel good before his last exam because it's a hard one. And with this, Kihyun knows he will feel good.

Kihyun slides his hand from Changkyun’s wrist to his arm and he can feel the other’s shiver. His own heart beats like crazy and he knows the younger’s is the same when his hand reaches to Changkyun’s neck. He moves his thumb over Changkyun’s soft lips and yes his face is really warm. Under his palm, he can feel the other’s pulse is beating at it’s best. He feels proud to make Changkyun’s body do these kind of things. It’s such a good feel to know you are the one who do this to someone else, they feel this because of you, their body show this reactions because of you. Kihyun loves to be in control at everything and this gives him a sense of different power.

To be honest Kihyun always liked the effect he had on Changkyun. He liked when the younger tripped when he smiled at him. He liked when Changkyun always did bring extra food when he came after trainings. He liked how the younger blush when their eyes locked as they randomly walk in the halls. Even when he didn’t admit these. But now, now he loves it more knowing they are only to him.

The younger slightly parts his lips, letting out a breath and it pass by Kihyun’s thumb, making a small tingle there. Kihyun comes closer, searching for any rejection but when he sees none, he presses his lips on the younger’s. Last time he did that, they were on that stupid party and Changkyun was drunk so he didn’t react but now his lips twitch under Kihyun’s. The younger puts his hands on Kihyun’s chest but he doesn’t push him. He doesn’t pull him either but Kihyun doesn’t care because this feels really good so he forces himself a bit more. He kiss the younger’s mouth with more passion and licks his lips, tasting the chocolate. It’s sweet like he thought but Changkyun’s lips are sweeter. When Changkyun slides his hands to his side, Kihyun feels heat trails along with them. It’s sensational somehow. They are excluded from the others but yet they are in public. That gives both fear and courage to Kihyun. Changkyun grasps his shirt more so Kihyun kisses more, really pressing the younger on the wall.

After a while he starts to feel dizzy and decides to pull back, his lungs crying for air. He heavily breathes, looking at the younger whose eyes are glassy and lips are pink, swollen. His chest rise up and down slowly.

“Sunbae what…” Changkyun tries to cope with what just happened. He looks puzzled and Kihyun has no intention to stay and chat with him. Kihyun presses the book on the younger’s torso and the younger holds it with shaky fingers.

“Come to my house tonight. I need you.” Kihyun says and the younger looks at him, unfocused.

“To study?” He asks in confusion and Kihyun smirks at him.

“You know what for. And I know you want it so I will be kind and give you what you want. Be there at eight sharp and don’t tell anyone or else I will talk with some people too.” Kihyun detaches his fingers from the book and steps back. He can see the debate in younger’s eyes as he tries to understand. When the things Kihyun said downs in him, his eyes go wide in surprise. Kihyun doesn’t wait for his answer and moves away, walking back to his table.

Jooheon who studies math looks up at him when he sits down. He eyes Kihyun with a frown on his face and looks at his hands.

“Didn’t you find what you look for?”

Kihyun smirks and looks at the figure who walks away with a book pressed to his chest.

“Oh I did.” He smiles to himself and gets back to where he left off, leaving Jooheon confused. He nudges Yoongi who smacks him in return.

“Come on get up and let’s study. I have an important thing to do after this last exam.”

 

 

*******

 

 

It’s a good thing that his parents gave Kihyun a house for him to live alone. Kihyun wanted to go to a different high school rather than going to the one in their district because he wanted to learn about the world more. Convincing his family wasn’t easy, Kihyun promised to visit them every weekend and they are paying his bills so that means they know every little thing he buy. That was a part of their agrement, buying some freedom and giving up some freedom. Since he knows that, Kihyun didn’t buy the condoms and lube with card of course, he used cash. He can’t just deal with his family asking the question he doesn’t want to reply.

After the last exam ended Kihyun says he will head home to get some sleep and everybody accept without question, thanking their luck for letting them off the hook even just for one day. Everybody is too tired already and they deserve a day off from practice. They bid farewell to each other and Kihyun goes to home quickly. He checks if he has everything he will need and he does. The time pass and he feels nervous somehow. A part of him tells that it’s an awful idea and another part of him thinks how amazing it was and how much he wants to feel what he felt that night again. And he chooses to listen the second part.

He makes meal as he waits. He likes to cook even though he lives alone. It relaxes him somehow. He cuts the tomatoes for salad and realizes he used to pack lunch for himself before he went to school but he stopped doing that since… Since Changkyun started to bring him lunch. Kihyun never asked where he get them, how he get them or does he have enough money to buy extra for him. Now he thinks about it because Hoseok once mentioned that Changkyun’s family does not earn well and that’s why he stays at public dorms, working at part-time jobs to stand on his feet. When he heard this for the first time Kihyun didn’t care but now he feels his heart getting heavy. He drops the knife, leaning towards the counter on his hands. Come to think of it, he never thought about Changkyun or his life before. It didn’t matter to him. Then why is he feels sorry for him now? Because he likes the feelings Changkyun makes him feel? Or how Kihyun can feel his every gentle touch even now? Like his lips… The memory of his lips brushing on Kihyun’s visits him for a second and Kihyun shivers. He feels want and… adoration towards Changkyun. And a little something else. He didn’t want to admit before when he jumped on Cory but that night at the party he was sure. That feeling was jealousy. At least some of it. Maybe it’s because he is the first person Changkyun slept with. Knowing that he is the first one and he is a special person to Changkyun, it’s natural for Kihyun to be overprotective. He knows Changkyun wants him too. His body literally pulls towards Kihyun when he sees him. And Kihyun is fine with that because he loves to be his magnet. If he can manage to turn this into a regular thing, it’s gonna be great. It’s a good scenario for both of them if he thinks. Kihyun will get the release he needs desperately and Changkyun will get to be with the one his heart desires. Win-win.

 

As the time pass Kihyun starts to get nervous. What if he doesn’t come? Kihyun is sure that the other one will come but still his eyes stuck at the clock. He counts the minutes as they pass. The door bell rings after sometime and Kihyun checks the clock. It’s 9 pm. He takes off his apron and hangs it behind the door, moving to open the front door. He checks himself before he opens the door. His blue shirt fits well on him like his black pants. His hair looks good too. Okay, he can open it.

Kihyun slowly opens the door, letting the other one in. Changkyun holds his backpack straps with both his hand, head hanging low. Kihyun closes the door and turns at the nervous boy who takes off his shoes.

“You are late. I said eight sharp.” He takes a step towards him. Changkyun’s eyes flicker at him for a moment but he looks down again.

“Yeah I’m sorry. One of my friend was sick so I had to take over his shift as well.” The younger looks at him with an apologetic face and Kihyun feels sorry for coming up on him. The boy looks tired actually and that makes Kihyun feel more sorry.

“Were you working after exams too?” Kihyun asks. Why did he ask that?

Changkyun nods slowly and smiles. It’s kinda sad.

“Is that why you were sleeping between lessons?” Kihyun asks tilting his head. Maybe that’s why his dark circles got black and more black. He was always walking around in the halls, pale as ghost. So this kid was studying for exams and working at the same time.

Changkyun nods again but frowns like something doesn’t add up. “You came to my classroom sunbae? Why?” He asks with a curious look. His eyes open huge. “Were you the one who covered blankets around me?”

Kihyun looks away. Why the fuck did he just ask that? Changkyun didn’t need to know that Kihyun was passing by in front of his classroom. By coincidence. More than a few times. He clears his throat barely and changing the subject seems like the best idea. He touches Changkyun’s arm softly, seeing visibly how he distracts from the topic. Kihyun takes his backpack, putting it on the ground. “Did you eat anything?” The younger shakes his head and he looks at him as Kihyun takes his hand and pulls him towards the table he set. The younger looks at their intertwined fingers and then at the table. Kihyun let’s go his hand- he feels cold when he does that. He pulls a chair to sit and motions younger to do the same. Changkyun sits as well but still his face shows big question marks.

“I made too much for one person and I wasn’t hungry until now. We can eat together.” Kihyun says and gives him a plate. He takes one to himself and they eat in silence but Kihyun sees Changkyun’s delightful expression as he savours the meal and feels proud when he occasionally hums without noticing. He looks cute when he chews, like some kind of squirrel munching on nuts. Kihyun almost forgets why he called him until he sees the younger lick his lips after finishing the meal.

“Thank you hyung. The meal was delicious.” Changkyun smiles up, his cheeks are pink. Since they are alone and they both know what they will do, it’s unreasonable for Kihyun to hold himself so he places his hand on the younger’s cheek and brushes his thumb over the color, feeling how soft his skin feels. Changkyun closes his eyes with shaky breaths. He looks so vulnerable like this, so unprotected. He lays out his heart out for Kihyun to see and this is what Kihyun needs. Being someone’s priority.

He closes the gap between them in a hurry. At first it’s soft when their lips brush but it turns more desperate because Kihyun wants more. He gets up pulling Changkyun with him as he walks and suddenly his bedroom seems so far away. Kihyun is sure that he can’t go that far, not when his dick already so hard. He pushes the younger on the couch, falling on him right after that. Changkyun chuckles as they sloppily kiss and Kihyun feels the sound resonate in his bones warmly. Changkyun circles his arms around Kihyun and Kihyun kiss, kiss and kiss him more, savoring the younger’s lips. He sucks Changkyun’s bottom lip, remembering how sweet it looks when it’s swollen. He needs to feel more, he need to get rid of their clothes so he pulls Changkyun’s beige sweatshirt. Changkyun doesn’t let him take it off like the last time and Kihyun wants to smack him for doing that.

“Hey, stop that. You look beautiful.” Kihyun presses a kiss on the younger’s neck, pleased when he let’s go his hands. Kihyun pulls the sweatshirt up, throwing it away. He takes off his shirt in a hurry and presses himself on the younger. Changkyun tilts his head, giving more easy access for Kihyun to reach and Kihyun places kiss from his jaw to his neck. Changkyun holds his hair with his small hands, pressing Kihyun more and shivers when Kihyun licks his collar bones from one side to the other. He tastes salty but his body is hot like a radiator. Kihyun holds his hip bones, slowly caressing them as he slides down with small bites. He remembers that he left some marks last time but none of them are in their place and that alone makes him remember how much he waited to feel like this again. He bites the younger’s soft stomach, smirking when Changkyun moans. He grips Kihyun’s hair more, pulling him up for a kiss. Kihyun pushes his tongue in younger’s parted lips and let him suck it. His mind gets dizzy with the hot feeling of Changkyun’s lips on him. When they are apart he presses his forehead on younger’s with a grin on his face.

“You can do that?” He asks with a low voice and Changkyun grins back at him. Yes two can play this game but for now Kihyun doesn’t want to play. He tugs the younger’s pant with his boxer, not giving him a chance to stop him. Changkyun hides his face in his neck and Kihyun laughs at his shyness. He was just sucking Kihyun’s tongue and now he feels embarrassed? Changkyun is truly full of surprises.

Kihyun retreats a little, revealing the younger’s blushed face. He looks cute with his shy smile and Kihyun can’t help but press kisses on his lips, cheeks and lastly his forehead.

“Don’t worry. It’s okay.” Changkyun nods and Kihyun reaches for the drawer next to the couch and pulls out lube and condoms. He opens the lube and squeezes some on his palm, feeling the cold gel. Changkyun watches his every move with want and slight doubt. Kihyun shimmies out of his pants and underwear too, maybe Changkyun will feel less embarrassed if they are even. He hiss at the feeling when their cocks brush and Changkyun gaps feeling the hard member on him. Kihyun is pleased with the expression on Changkyun’s face, he rubs his fingers together to warm them up and moves under them. Couch does make it hard for him to find the other one’s hole since it dips inside with their weight but he manages find it. He presses his index at the rim and Changkyun grips his shoulder. It’s obvious that he is tense, his every muscle his stiff and it won’t work if he keep feeling like this. Kihyun bites Changkyun’s low abdomen and licks the bruise that start to shape. He moves up pressing little kisses on his torso, feeling the grip slowly gets weaker. He closes his mouth over Changkyun’s left nipple and the younger moves his hands from his shoulder to his hair gripping his locks. Then Kihyun pushes his first digit in, slowly opening the younger as he licks the sensitive bud. He adds another finger when he feels it’s loosen enough. He continues to bite and kiss anywhere he can reach. He contemplates adding another finger but he can’t wait anymore because his dick almost cries. Kihyun rolls a condom over it and aligns himself gripping Changkyun’s hips and slowly he pushes down. It’s so fucking tight, maybe he should have add that third finger. When he push the head he hears a silent whimper. He looks at the younger who breaths sharply with eyes tightly closed, chest covered with sweaty fresh pink, red and purple marks.

“Are you okay?” Kihyun stops moving, reaching and swaying some ash-blonde locks damped on the younger’s forehead and Changkyun opens his eyes to look at him. Kihyun feels that pull again. The pull that reach somewhere inside him, pinching there, causing his palms get sweaty and overwork his heart. Changkyun’s eyes are beautiful. There are little stars in his eyes, Kihyun can see their light slowly swims in his pupils. It’s so easy to get lost into. They are like fresh earth after the rain, alive and makes you feel alive.

Changkyun moves his hands at his back, gripping his sides waking Kihyun from his hypnose. He slowly pushes in, searching discomfort in the younger’s face at every second and stops when he does. It takes a little longer than he expected but then again he should have add that third finger. When he is fully in he stops, giving time for the other to adjust and he drops himself on the younger, crashing him a little but he doesn’t care. He closes his eyes and enjoy that delightful feeling that he feels when those tight walls surround his dick. He takes slow breathes, getting ready to get up but he hears the younger’s heart beats. Kihyun can feel Changkyun’s heart beating through his ribs and every thump knocks in his head. This heart beats for him, this heart beats only for him. It’s good, so good. He feels his own heart hitting towards his ribs. It’s like somebody is squeezing it. It feels amazing.

He gets up, pressing a kiss where he heard the heartbeats and bites there. He doesn’t know why though, maybe to mark it as his own. Changkyun pulls him in for a kiss and Kihyun starts to move. He doesn’t hold back much since he waited too long. He rolls his hips over and over, making Changkyun cry out in his name. It can be a primitive instinct maybe, the one he laughed at when he read at biology but right now Kihyun feels powerful somehow. He feels in control, more than anything he did in his life when Changkyun squirm under him. His blood pumps in his ears, his heart beats crazy.

When he feels the heat pooling inside his stomach he holds the other’s whimpering dick, pumping it with his moves. It’s crazy how easy he can do this compared to last one. Changkyun bites his shoulder, moving his fingers at Kihyun back, pulling him impossibly closer.

Kihyun grabs the head of the couch and moves with more force, changing his angle and hits the jackpot when the other one moans louder.

“Hyung…” Changkyun whispers and Kihyun captures his lips, kissing the hell out of them. He swallows every voice the other let out and keeps hitting that sweet spot over and over again. He fists the younger’s dick and knows he is close so he pull out and push inside completely, hitting that spot one last time letting the other come in white. He fucks Changkyun through his orgasm and spills inside the condom, moving a few times more as his mind and sight go blank for a second. He lays on the younger for a minute to steady his breath, Changkyun’s one hand on his shoulder and the other one tangled in his hair. He feels dizzy with sensation, feels energetic and drained at the same time.

Kihyun slowly slips out of the younger, taking out the condom and tying it. He gets up throwing it in the trash bin. He cleans himself with wipes, pulls his underwear on and comes back to check the younger. Changkyun looks exhausted. His eyes are half closed, he breathes slowly. There are biting marks on his neck, collar bones, torso. Kihyun feels a little sorry, he might have gone too far with the biting. Well now he won’t open his top buttons. Kihyun sits next to him, wiping the semen from the other’s abdomen and Changkyun opens his sleepy eyes. He reaches for the wipes.

“I can do that.” He tries to hold them but too weak to do that, he gives up when Kihyun shakes his head, cleaning the boy himself. He puts his boxers on too.

After that Changkyun tries to get up but groans with pain. Kihyun holds his shoulders to steady him. How will he go to the dorm like this? Besides from what Kihyun heard the dorms are not warm that much. He can offer a bed to the younger, maybe just for today.

“You can stay here. We don’t have school tomorrow.” Kihyun shrugs. He doesn’t mind if he stays after all he just kinda fuck his brains out a few minutes ago. Changkyun doesn’t protest, he lies back to the couch curling to himself, he puts his hands under head and with that he looks like a kitten. Kihyun doesn’t even like cats but somehow Changkyun manages to look cute. Kihyun catches himself smiling at him, shaking his head to get out of his chain of thoughts. He goes up to his room to get a blanket even though it’s a painful thing if he considers the actions he just did. He turns off the light, covers the younger with the blanket and sits next to him. Suddenly his bed looks so far away, _again_. Kihyun doesn’t want to go up all the way and lay on his bed alone. It must be cold and Kihyun shivers just with the thought so he quickly goes under the cover and since there is not much space on the couch and he has to preserve some heat, he wraps his arms around the younger.

His heart still beats like crazy with that sweet warm feeling flowing through his body as he gives in to sleep.

 

 

*******

 

 

Kihyun opens his eyes, with a little pain at his back. He reaches out and groans when his skin tightens with pain. Courtesy of Changkyun’s nails. With that he realizes that he is alone and the younger is nowhere to be seen. His backpack is gone. He must have left before Kihyun wakes up.

Kihyun slowly gets up and wraps the blanket around him. He needs to take a shower asap, he doesn’t know how he slept like that yesterday actually. His eyes stuck on the table as he walks towards the shower. The plates are gone and they are in the washing tray, clean and shiny. Changkyun must have washed them before he left. Kihyun laughs at him. He pushes to sleep the kid with him but he washes the dishes before he left. How funny is that.

Yeah, Kihyun can get use to this.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what do you think? I think this chapter was necessary for story to roll in it's place.  
> I would ask you to come find me in twitter and be friends but I'm too shy so, sorry for that*_*
> 
> TELL ME WHAT DO YOU THINK


	4. 0

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there!!  
> I hope you like this chapter I know it took a bit long for me to add but hey, here we are!  
> Thank you for you comments and kudos.
> 
>  
> 
> Tell me what you think^^

It’s almost summer. You can feel the warm breeze when you are outside. The weather is weird, sometimes it’s too hot even though it’s rainy and sometimes it’s too heavy and cold. But it’s not one of those chilly days. It’s a sunny day, a warm day where Kihyun can see how sunlight hits Changkyun’s ash blonde hair and the strands seem brighter than usual. The sun bathing the younger’s skin and Kihyun almost feels jealous of it, because the light touches Changkyun so sweet, causing his skin to shine like gold.

They are in Kihyun’s house again like the past weeks and Changkyun is at the backyard of the house. There are high trees so it’s kinda secluded from the curious looks. There is a basketball hoop standing close to the brick walls. Kihyun sometimes plays here by himself when he feels edgy or nervous.

Changkyun stands on the grass barefoot, wearing a white shirt and a gray short. He holds Kihyun’s old-looking basketball in his hands. That ball has seen enough, Kihyun must have had it for at least 3 years. He played a lot with the orange ball, bouncing it on the ground again and again. Sometimes he scored and sometimes he didn't but he never felt this interested in it, not until Changkyun touch it. The younger looks up at the hoop and ball again like he is trying to calculate something. Kihyun waits for him to do anything maybe throw the ball or bounce it a few times but he doesn’t. Changkyun sighs softly, slowly kneels and puts the ball on the ground.

“Why didn’t you throw?” Kihyun asks as soft as possible not to scare him but the younger startles anyway. Changkyun turns to him with big eyes, grasping his chest with his right hand and lets out a nervous giggle when he sees the elder.

“You scared me hyung.”

Kihyun giggles too although he feels bad for scaring him but what could he do, Changkyun was gonna scare anyway. Besides he looks cute when his eyes go wide. Like an anime character, he has a stupid charm.

Kihyun walks towards him, his hands in his pocket. He just got out of the shower but he didn’t dry his hair since the weather is hot and it will dry anyway so his hair is slightly wet. He knows he looks hot because he can see the way Changkyun looks at him. Like some sort of a model walking on the runway with Gucci or Dior clothes not like a guy who walks on the grass with a gray hoodie and shorts on.

“So why didn’t you?” Kihyun asks and continues when he sees the confusion on the younger’s face. “Why didn’t you throw the ball?” He gestures to the orange ball that sits on the grass, right between them.

“Oh. I don’t know how.” Changkyun scratches his ear with a bashful look. His mouth twitches and his cheeks are red. Kihyun tilts his head in a questioning way.

“How come you don’t know how to throw a ball? It’s just a ball.” He shrugs.

Changkyun shrugs too. He shows his hands inside his pockets, mirroring Kihyun. “I’m not good with sports. Like not good with any of them. Even the basic ones. I don’t know how to swim or play football.” He stops and looks up, pursing his lips. Kihyun wants to kiss those lips. “I think I’m only good with online games.”

Kihyun swallows hard and takes of his gray hoodie, throwing it away. Changkyun looks confused when he takes the ball from the ground. Kihyun looks at the hoop, he bends slowly and throws the ball right in. He holds his hands in the air, and pose for a second before he turn to look at the younger who watch him in awe. He winks and enjoys the pink color splashed on Changkyun’s cheeks. Kihyun feels satisfied with the reaction so he takes the ball from the ground and walks back to the younger, offering it to him.

“You see? It’s easy. Now you try.”

“Hyung I’m really not good at it. I don’t think I can—“ Changkyun starts.

“Oh come on Changkyun you can do it. ” Kihyun comes closer, pressing the ball to the other’s chest, keeping it between them. He looks into the younger’s eyes. “I believe you can do it.”

A shy smile forms on Changkyun’s face as he takes the ball from the other. He looks at Kihyun who tries (not so hard) to hide his smirk and shakes his head to him. He turns to the basket. He lifts the ball and throws it with all his power but it falls too short and don’t even reach the net.

“See I told you.” Changkyun throws him a smile but Kihyun can tell he is embarrassed with the look on his eyes. He can read the other one well after all the time they spent together.

He knows when he is embarrassed.

Or reach his climax. That’s irrelevant for now though.

“Nobody can do it in the first time.”

Changkyun snorts and Kihyun shrugs at him.

“I couldn’t do it at the first time too. Or second time.” Kihyun takes the ball where it landed, taking it back to the younger. Changkyun takes the ball from him with a surprised face.

“I thought you always played well hyung. You know… You are amazing.”

Kihyun can see his inner fanboy is showing so he shakes his head to hide his smirk.

“I may be good now but I wasn’t always this good. Many people- including my own family members didn’t believe I could play basketball because I don’t—you know I don’t meet with the expectations for the ideal basketball player. You know size is important.” He let’s his smirk show itself.

Changkyun rolls his eyes at Kihyun’s suggestive words but he giggles as he throws the ball and fails again. Kihyun takes the ball where it falls and walks back to him. Again.

“Here.” He gives the ball to the younger and gets behind him. “Let me show you how to do.”

Changkyun nods calmly bu Kihyun can hear his quickening breath when they are close. He knows the younger’s mind is slipping away. His heart is thumping too. They’ve been in more intimate positions than standing in a garden, trying to pass a ball inside a net but Kihyun finds it exhilarating. The feeling of exposure and privacy gets him more.

He swallows hardly and tries to focus what he intended to do. So he pats Changkyun’s calf with his hand to correct his posture. Kihyun brushes his fingers on his inner thighs before he say, “Open your legs a little.”

He takes a note himself to give him a longer short before he leaves.

Changkyun moves his right leg to the side and Kihyun grabs his shoulders. He gets closer to the younger, pressing his body slightly to his. The smell of amber shampoo-his shampoo- comes from the younger’s slighlty damped hair, making Kihyun’s head go hazy. Suddenly he has no interest in the ball or the hoop. He doesn’t care about throwing the ball, it feels stupid.He knows Changkyun lost his interest in the game too because he tilts his head towards Kihyun’s shoulder and rests it there, opening his neck for him to do whatever he wants and Kihyun slides his hands from the younger’s bare arms until his small hands and hold them, causing ball to fall and roll to God knows where. He presses a kiss on the younger’s neck and shoulders, back of his head. Kihyun takes a deep breath, loving the smell Changkyun has, his smell. He feels some sort of possesiveness towards him, liking the way it feels. He puts his hands on Changkyun’s stomach and press him to his body more. Changkyun smells so good, so familiar Kihyun can’t hold back from kissing his neck, running his nose on it. The moans and voices escaping Changkyun’s lips are like music to his ears. Kihyun slides one of his hand at the younger’s back and inside his shorts, using his other hand to press him on his body more by putting it on his chest. Changkyun grinds himself to Kihyun as Kihyun gropes the skin of his ass, loving the way the younger’s breath hitch.

“You think you are still loose?” He presses his hard-on to the younger. He is very turned on even though they fucked a few hours ago. He can feel the younger’s heart beating like a butterfly in a can, quick and airy under his hand. Changkyun barely swallows before he nods and Kihyun makes him get on the grass without wasting a second. He pulls the younger’s shorts along with his own and slides in quickly. Changkyun is still loose even after 2 hours but tight enough for Kihyun to see stars.

“Oh fuck.” As much as he enjoys to be enveloped in hot, tight walls of Changkyun, Kihyun stops for younger to adjust. He playfully smacks the younger’s ass. “You should have warn me.”

Changkyun chuckles under him, hands grasping the grass, dirt, whatever he finds. “I didn’t want to wait.”

“Naughty.” Kihyun smiles and leans in, biting the younger’s shoulder where it’s exposed and earns a whine from other. “You good?” he asks, gently carding Changkyun’s hairs from his face to see him.

Changkyun closes his eyes and wiggles under him and Kihyun takes it as a sign so he starts to move. He feels he can go deeper this way and notes himself to try this sex-from-back thing on a more soft ground, like his bed that looks too far right now.

He moves quick and fast, leaving no room for Changkyun to breath. He finds the younger’s sweet spot easier and keeps hitting there until he is sure Changkyun sees the stars and that high pitch moan he likes to hear spills from his mouth. He moves a few times before he comes too.

He pulls out after that, pulling his shorts up and Changkyun pulls his shorts too. Changkyun turns and sits on the ground trying to swipe the dirt away from his hands. If Kihyun didn’t know he just fucked him, he’d think Changkyun is a little kid with his pink cheeks and dirty hands. But he knows better.

“What?” Changkyun throws him a smile and Kihyun wonders if he is the boy that grind on him moments ago.

Changkyun looks really cute with his blushed face and glassy eyes. His cute shorts and sleveless shirt makes him look like an innocent boy.

Except the purple bruises on his neck and the ones probably forming on his shoulder tells otherwise.

They look hot.

Kihyun holds his hand out and Changkyun takes it. Kihyun pulls him to his feet and Changkyun grimaces with pain.

“As much as I like it, can we do this on a softer ground next time? My ass hurts.” He rubs his back and Kihyun chuckles, pulling him to himself. He kisses the younger sweetly.

“Sorry I couldn’t help myself. I like your body.” Kihyun places a kiss on the younger’s cheek and trails to his jaw. Changkyun grasps his shoulder and let’s out a gasp when Kihyun moves up licking his jaw until his lips. Kihyun intends to move forward but Changkyun pulls back, shaking his head. Kihyun frowns because he was really getting into mood. Again. Being a teenager really gives you that strength.

Changkyun smiles and holds Kihyun’s face inside his hands, placing a feathery but sweet kiss on his lips. Kihyun wants to trail but Changkyun pulls back, chuckling.

“I gotta go. My shift starts in an hour and thanks to somebody, I gotta shower again so I yeah I gotta go.” He leaves Kihyun’s embrace and gets inside the house.

Kihyun follows him. He should find a longer short.

 

*******

 

“Bro where were you yesterday?” Hyungwon throws the bottle to Kihyun and Kihyun catches it in the air.  He opens the cap and takes a sip. The water is cold and since his body is burning due to exercise, he feels the liquid trailing until inside his stomach freshing.

“What are you talking about?” He furrows his eyebrows and throws the bottle back at the taller one. Hyungwon looks at him confused.

“I called you to hang out since it’s been awhile we go out. You are always busy with weird shits.” Hyungwon stops for a second to sneeze. “What was I gonna say? Oh yeah you remember that club you said you wanted to go when they open it?”

Kihyun nods, feeling a little confused and bites his tongue to not say something to Hyungwon he will regret later. He’s so busy lately. The exams are over for now but nationals are coming and in two weeks they will play their first game. Between the school work and trainings Kihyun can barely finds time to relax and to be fair he doesn’t want to spend those hours with the idiots he see all day. He prefers to do other things. Take a walk, go to a cafe or gym, find a certain sophomore and fuck his brains out some time to time. He often spends his time with Changkyun- of course his friends doesn’t know that. It was two times a week at first, he told himself it would be enough. He was convinced that it’s enough but without Kihyun noticing the physical moments they share got frequent and Kihyun found himself chasing the younger around, always watching him from afar at school. He started to do his homework at library, knowing Changkyun spends most of his time there. He didn’t know why he doesn’t study at the dorm but Kihyun has a guess that Changkyun like to be surrounded by the books. He is such a big nerd after all. Whenever Kihyun picks a book he is sure that Changkyun can recite his favorite parts from the book to him. Normally Kihyun doesn’t like to admit he doesn’t know something. He considers it like some kind of a failure so he always acts like he knows it all but lately he realized listening things, even the things he already know is not such a bad thing, if Changkyun is the one talking about them.

Like last week when he told Kihyun about honeybees. Kihyun didn’t know he could enjoy a conversation that involved honeybees.

Changkyun is a lively kid, a different kind of vibe he has. Kihyun thought he was shy at first and he is a shy person still, but he likes to talk with big gestures when he feels comfortable. He is very expressionist, you can see his reaction to something immediately. For instance he has a habit of covering his face with his hands when he feels embarrassed and Kihyun says the words and phrases that he knows that he will catch the younger off guard.

Because Kihyun likes to see him blush.

Because Kihyun feels like sun is touching his heart and brush his skin with it’s warmth when Changkyun smiles.

Changkyun is addictive.

Not just his body and pretty ass but his mind too.

Kihyun didn’t realize it before because he didn’t care but he always noticed the books he read even when he was walking in the halls. Changkyun is pretty clever and he is the top of his class. He does his homeworks days before their due and gets higher points more than anyone. He even got A+ from calculus. Kihyun himself is the only person he knows who got A at that lesson and it was the highest point for 3 years because their teacher is a stubborn and tough guy who doesn’t like giving high points to his students. He gloat about that a lot so Kihyun was very surprised when he learned the younger’s result. Honestly Kihyun is happy that he is not at the same age with the younger because if they were, he knows they’d be equal and rivals. Since that's not the situation and since he really likes how the younger's mind works, Kihyun felt proud when Changkyun told him about his grade with happy eyes. Kihyun told that he was proud of him both time when he fucked him into the mattress that night.

And snuggled him, not letting him go to his dorm.

Again.

That topic is another mystery to Kihyun actually.

At first Kihyun was making excuses about dorms being cold even at spring so that’s why he often didn’t let the younger go away after their _sessions_. And when the times passed, after sometime it became a habit for Kihyun to let Changkyun occasionally sleeping in with him. He came to terms that he likes the feeling of Changkyun’s body pressed to his when they are together. Kihyun likes the days Changkyun sleep on his bed which they are mostly the weekends.

In week Kihyun often went by to his workplace to pick Changkyun up after he learned that he works at a cafe and it closes after midnight. Streets are dangerous and Kihyun couldn’t simply sit still after one day he learned someone stalked Changkyun after work.

So yeah he is busy, day and night but he was being careful, at least he thought he was being careful with this secret sneak outs but apparently his friends noticed that he isn’t around much.

Today too he planned to spend his lunch time in library where he knows Changkyun would be. But he guesses that idea is out of the window now.

“From earth to Kihyun hyung, are you there?” Jooheon punches his arm slightly, pulling Kihyun apart from his thoughts.

Kihyun furrows his eyebrows and shakes his head,  trying to remember what they were talking. “What?”

Jooheon looks at him with confused eyes. “Hyungwon hyung is talking about that club you’ve been rambling since forever? We used to bowl there remember?”

Oh shit. Kihyun forgot about that. There was this old bowling house they used to hang out but somebody else bought it and decided to turn it into a club. The boys were really excited to visit the place and Kihyun too, was very curious about it since he had not have many chance to go to the club. Or any club to be honest. His neighborhood was small and didn’t contain any fun place except the record store.

“Did they open it?”

Hyungwon rolls his eyes as he peels his shirt off.

“Of course they did.”

“Sorry, I didn’t know.” Kihyun takes a towel from his bag.

“You don’t know many things Kihyun. You are an oblivious fucker to many things.” Yoongi shakes his head and rolls his eyes as he walks towards to them with a towel tucked on his waist.

If Kihyun isn’t too caught up by his failed plans for the lunch, he could think there is some sort of hint in Yoongi’s words.

“Whatever hyung. What were you doing last night when I called you?” Hyungwon asks as they walk to the showers stalls.

Kihyun pauses for a second. “Um… Homeworks and stuff.”

“On Sunday?”

Hyungwon crosses his arms and lifts his left burrow. He doesn’t buy it but Kihyun doesn’t care. He doesn’t need to explain himself to anyone so he doesn’t reply.

“Well whatever. We are going that club today. As a team. All the boys are excited to get some fun so don’t forget.”

Hyungwon turns left and gets in the shower before Kihyun can reply.

Well fuck, Kihyun hates to have friends.

.

 *******

 

School cafeteria is a place where you can see many type of students. It’s kind of a gathering place for  everyone. There are silent ones who sit at the corner, loners with their lunchbox, cheerleaders with their detox juices, nerds with their books and sportsmen with all their prick.

Kihyun likes the attention they get when they walk into the room, he knows every girl is charmed by them and every boy wants to be one of them. He feels important and he feels that more since they won the games that opened them the way to the nationals. He knows his team likes the attention as well because he can see Hyunwoo winking at a cheerleader girl and Hyungwon gets more letters than usual. Like the amount he get wasn’t much before.

“Why do we have to eat this shit? It’s too green.” Jooheon lifts his spoon and his supposed to be lunch drips from the metal into the plate. He looks at it with a disgusted face and Hyunwoo shakes his head, exchanging his sandwich with Jooheon’s casseroul to make him shut up so he can keep dozing off to pretty cheerleader.

Kihyun can say the girls look cute. He dated the blonde one before but she was too clingy. A big no to Kihyun.

Maybe that’s why he feels good to have this casual sex thing with Changkyun because the younger never calls or text him to ask if they should _hang out._ It’s always Kihyun who seeks him around to _hang out._

But it annoys Kihyun sometimes.

It’s Changkyun who has a crush on Kihyun. Shouldn’t he be the one who chase him down?

Kihyun doesn’t know. He isn’t sure of many things. Even now he watches the cafeteria and the students around him with a keen look. His eyes dart to clock and it’s almost one o’clock, a perfect time for a certain person to walk in. Kihyun already memorized the younger’s daily pattern since he tries to match his time with Changkyun’s. He studies at the library at until almost lunch time is over and comes to cafeteria with his white haired weird- Minhyuk once Hoseok called him- friend.

Today too Changkyun walks into cafeteria with Minhyuk. Minhyuk doesn’t wear his jacket and so does Changkyun too but his cute glass is on his face as usual. The white haired tells him something with big moves, he throws his hand and makes faces. Changkyun laughs at him. He really laughs. His eyes shine at Minhyuk and he holds his arm to not to fall as he giggles. It’s so beautiful to see him like that. Changkyun is always beautiful but there is a cuteness hidden in his perfectly shaped features and Kihyun loves to see that. He doesn’t laugh much around Kihyun but Kihyun knows it’s because he is kinda starstruck when he is with Kihyun and gets embarrassed too easily. His face tints with rose color when he is shy but this, when he laughs his face shines.

“What are you looking at hyung?”

“What?” Kihyun clears his throat and lowers his gaze to his coke. He takes a sip quickly.

“You had a stupid smile on your face. Joohoney probably talks about it.” Yoongi comments and Kihyun glares at him.

Kihyun sticks his fork to the salad with a bit of force. “I was thinking about our victories to come.” He throws a tomato inside his mouth and chews. “Onehigh will be easy. I heard their captains likes to play 2-2-2. I think we can beat them at quarter finals.”

“With all the training we’ve done for the past five weeks, I expect us to win the olympics.” Hyungwon murmurs without lifting his head up from the table. His meal stays untouched in the plate which is a great thing for Jooheon and Hyunwoo since they will be the ones who end up eating that.

“Thankfully we’ll be able to have some fun tonight.”

“Yes Hyunwoo hyung. I don’t plan on stepping off from the dance floor tonight.” Jooheon moves his shoulders happily, bumping them to Kihyun’s but stops when he realizes the annoyed look on Kihyun’s face.

“You are so tensed hyung. Why are you like that?” Jooheon pouts, knowing that it will work and it does. Kihyun’s expression softens.

“I’m just a bit stressed. That’s all.”

“Maybe we should find another guy for you to lay with tonight hyung.” Cory smirks across him, talking for the first time since they sit on the table. Kihyun doesn’t know who invited him but he guesses his teammates still feel the slight anger between them and want them to solve this problem since they are teammates and they have games to play. After all playing at nationals are their golden dream. If they want to do things right, they should work together but whatever Cory does, he steps on Kihyun’s nerves somehow. He just detests the kid. Now too, he feels his blood boil after that stupid comment.

“Cut it out already. I’m not gay.” He throws a burning glare at the younger but Cory laughs, holding his hand in the air.

“I didn’t say anything for that.”

“Guys stop teasing the kid.” Hoseok blurts out as he drinks his protein shake.

“But maybe he is right.” Kihyun snaps his head to Yoongi. “You can use a good sex. We’ll find someone for you tonight don’t worry. A girl or a boy.”

Kihyun is getting more annoyed each second. He wants to get out of the cafeteria but he doesn’t want to look weird for acting like a kid so he just bites his tongue and sits.

“What’s going on over there?” Jooheon pats his shoulder and shows him the food line. Hoseok jerks his head to see what happens and gets up immediately going there.

A big, muscular guy from the football team is talking angrily with Minhyuk who stands there with his hands on his hips. Kihyun can’t understand what’s going on but from the spilled soup on the ground and the tray football guy- Lee is holding he can guess what happened.

Kihyun hear Lee say “Why the fuck don’t you look at where you are going?” before he pushes Minhyuk from the shoulde, hard, causing Minhyuk to stumble back. He must have pushed Minhyuk hard. Kihyun knows that Lee is a strong guy, they go to the same gym.

“Hey Lee, let him go.” Hoseok gets between them. He holds his hands in the air to interfere if something happens.

“I told you, it was you who was walking backwards. You should have been careful.” Minhyuk moves next to Hoseok and pushes Lee back.

Wrong move. That is a wrong move.

You see, Kihyun knows the troubled kids like Lee. They think they own the school and everybody should obey their words. Like every syllable that leaves their lips should be accepted as the only truth. They don’t accept they are wrong and they never say sorry. Kihyun knows because he was one of them. Once.

“Say you are sorry.” Lee breaths from his nose sharply, slightly shaking with anger.

“If you kiss my ass.” Minhyuk snorts.

Lee laughs in disbelief and grasps white haired kid’s collar. Minhyuk doesn’t look like he is scared. He grabs Lee’s hands and tries to shake them but Lee doesn’t move. Hoseok grasps his hands but Lee pushes him away, causing him to fall. All the boys stand up to move but Hoseok holds his hand up, making them stop because he knows if they fight it can cause big problems. Kihyun fists his hands angrily, biting his lips.

“Let’s see if you will laugh after I break your pretty teeth.” Lee draws his hand back to hit Minhyuk but someone stops him, at least tries to make him stop by grabbing his arm.

“Stop Lee please.” Changkyun pleads.

Kihyun can see the veins on Lee’s forehead becomes visible and he gets more angry. He doesn’t need to think before he gets up from his seat and cross the room in milliseconds.

 “Let go midget!” Lee waves his free hand and pushes Changkyun. The younger stumbles a few steps back but Kihyun manages to hold him before he fall. He turns with big, round eyes who carries surprise in them and let’s out a breath when he sees Kihyun’s face. Clearly he braced himself thinking that he will fall.

Kihyun squeezes his shoulders in assurance and stands him straight. He holds Lee’s hand that is grasped Minhyuk’s collar and twists it a little. Lee maybe big but Kihyun is quick and believe it or not he has more power than Hoseok. Lee curses and holds his hand with the other one.

“What are you doing Lee?” Kihyun asks with a cold tone. The surprised and scared look on Changkyun’s face is enough for Kihyun to kick Lee’s balls until they turn into dust. He is so angry for pushing his Changkyun like he is nothing because he is too idiot to look where he walks. He feels his hand is itching to punch him but Kihyun has a reputation to keep so he decides to remain calm.

“What the fuck are you doing Yoo?” Lee snarls. “Why are you involving this? What is it to you?”

Kihyun let’s out a breath and flexes his shoulders. He tries to make his chest look bigger to seem intimidating. He takes a step forward, getting in between him and Minhyuk because Changkyun hurries his friends to see if he is okay.

“You know us, students are too stressed by the school and we only have certain free times that we can enjoy and rest some during the day. I was eating a good lunch with my friends over there until you decided to fuck it up by starting an idiot fight for nothing. So on behalf of everybody here I’m telling you to shut up. I’m not here to listen your bullshit. Go have your fight at somewhere else. Prefarably on the game court. Nobody has to put up with you here.”

Lee gets red and red with fury as Kihyun talks, aware that everybody in the cafeteria listens their conversation- more truthfully Kihyun’s monologue. People are whispering, saying Kihyun is awesome and he said the right things so Lee knows they are sided with him.

“Cut it off Lee!” Someone yells from behind.

“Go away, we are trying to eat!” Another voice raise.

“What’s going on here?” Mr Kim walks in with his books and Lee pales when he hears their teacher’s voice. He takes a few steps back but Kihyun can see the anger he directs to his way.

“I will see you again.” He murmurs and turns on his tracks to meet with the teacher. Kihyun hears him saying airy things to the teacher but he doesn’t care. He immediately turns back and looks at the trio. Minhyuk let’s out a big breath and giggles, clinging to Changkyun and Hoseok. Kihyun wants to push him away and unclasp his hold from the younger but he knows his friends are watching and it will be weird if he does that so he just clears his throat and forces his voice to stay calm. He hides it well but his heart is beating like crazy.

“Thank you Ki.” Hoseok pats his shoulder with a grateful smile.

“Thank you Kihyun. I thought you were an asshole but I guess you can be good too.” Minhyuk says with a giggle and Changkyun pushes him away(good), looking embarrassed.

“Hyung please be kind, he helped you.” He elbows his teasing friend and turns to Kihyun. He avoids looking directly at Kihyun’s eyes. “Thank you Kihyun hyung.” Changkyun slightly bows, cheeks are red and pulls his giggling friend and Hoseok who frowns at him without waiting for Kihyun to answer.

Kihyun watches them leave the cafeteria. He wants to follow them, to check if Changkyun is okay but Hoseok is with them. Besides he has no excuse to tell if he asks why he followed them so half heartedly he goes to sit on his place.

Hyungwon is up- of course he is up, how could he sleep in all this mess. He leans on his arm that he placed on table. Jooheon claps his hand in a cute way and Yoongi smirks at him, shaking his head.

“Thank you for not backing up assholes.” Kihyun pulls his chair and slumps on it.

Hyunwoo shrugs and sips his soda. “You seemed to manage everything well. Besides I could always throw Yoongi towards you if anything happened.”

“Oh fuck you big bear.” Yoongi slaps him. “Kihyun we should—“

Kihyun’s phone lights up with a message. He reads the sender’s name and bolts up. Yoongi stops mid-sentence and watches him leaving the table with a curious look.

“Guys I forgot that I gotta see Ms Bora for the term project. See you later.” Kihyun grabs his bag and rushes out, leaving his whining friends behind. He pulls out his phone and dials Changkyun’s number.

“Hyung I—“

“Meet me in staff room at third floor in five minutes.” Kihyun hangs up and takes the stairs with quick feet. He walks the empty floors and reaches the room in the end. He knows everybody is busy with lunch and relaxing at somewhere so this floor is empty.

After a few seconds he gets there the door opens and Changkyun walks in. He is out of breath, Kihyun thinks he must have run there. Kihyun drops his bag and pulls him inside, locking the door behind them.

He cups younger’s face and examines him. His cheeks are red, maybe because he hurried to come here but Kihyun knows it’s because he is glad to see Kihyun. He let’s out small breaths as Kihyun slides his hands to his shoulders, slightly turning his body, looking at him with concern in his eyes.

“Are you okay? Did he hurt you?” Kihyun asks. Worry drips from his voice. Also his anger starts to resurface and that desire to punch Lee in the face is getting bigger and bigger each second.

Changkyun holds his hands and squeeze them softly with a nod. “I’m okay. I just wanted to say…” He bites his lip, unaware of the effect he is causing on Kihyun. “Thank you hyung. You didn’t have to stop him but you helped my friend. So um… _thank you._ ”

He smiles gratefully and looks like something is on his mind before he leans in and place a kiss on Kihyun’s lips. Usually it’s Kihyun who initiates it but sometimes Changkyun leans in first, catching him off guard. Kihyun normally likes to feel in control but this feels differently good. Letting Changkyun take the lead is good. Makes Kihyun feel wanted.

Like he always have.

He slides his hand down from the younger’s shoulders to his back, pulling Changkyun’s body towards himself. He takes a few steps forward until the younger’s back is pressed to the wall. Changkyun places a hand on Kihyun’s face and slides his other hand under his shirt. He caresses his fingers on Kihyun’s cheekbone, causing him to smile into their kiss and make him shiver when his hand presses on the elder’s skin. Kihyun feels his heart fluttering with the gesture and presses himself on the younger more. He nibbles with his bottom lip and kissing jaw. Changkyun moves his hand from his face and holds his hair, tilting his head to give him better access to his neck. Kihyun moves forward tracing down slowly. He likes the soft skin under Changkyun’s chin. He feels the younger’s erratic breathing on his neck and shivers. Kihyun gropes at youngers ass and squeeze him, he likes to do that. He continues to place kisses under Changkyun’s jaw and bites there, careful to not leave any mark though. Changkyun moves his hand under his shirt and his fingers leave flamy traces behind them. Kihyun feel the burn pooling in his lower abdomen. He presses his knee to the younger’s buldge, causing him to draw a sharp breath.

“Hyung…” Changkyun breathes out faintly. “We can’t… Wait.” He tugs Kihyun and cups his face. Kihyun doesn’t want to stop but Changkyun places a kiss on his lips and then he kisses Kihyun’s cheek before he moves away from Kihyun’s hold.

Kihyun whines when he does that but Changkyun shakes his head with a giggle. He places another loud kiss on Kihyun’s cheek and reaches for the door knob.

“As much as I like snogging with you in the staff room, we are still at school and Minhyuk hyung is waiting for me with Hoseok hyung. I should get back to them.” He combs his hair with his fingers and fixes his shirt- when did Kihyun opened his first button anyway? He must have been dazed.

“See you later?” Kihyun asks, collecting his bag from the ground and Changkyun nods, leaving the room.

Kihyun let’s out a breath and takes a step outside. Maybe he won’t go to that club tonight.

“So…” Kihyun freezes in his place when he hears the voice. He slightly turns and sees Yoongi who leans the wall with a smirk on his face. “I’m guessing it’s been going on since that day?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And what do you think ^^  
> Comments and kudos are very welcomed^^


	5. 0

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my dear changkinators!!!  
> I'm sorry for disappearing for a looooong time. I was out of the country and couldn't find time to write an update.  
> Yeah I wrote 7k+ to make it up to you guys and believe me even I'm surprised.  
> Anyway thank you for the support and love you are showing me!!  
> I hope you'll like this chapter as well.  
> Tell me what you think^^

A sudden clench of his heart stops Kihyun in his track. Time decides to not go on for a second. Yes If Kihyun had to describe that moment when he heard his best friend’s voice in an unthinkable time, he would describe it just like that. A heart and time stopping moment. How funny. There are a lot of moments that Kihyun wished to stop time but this is certainly not one of them. He just wants to vaporize into the air and get lost but he knows it is impossible. He holds his breath and curses mentally at his damn luck.

He tries to swallow and calm himself as his heart starts to beat at his mouth. His hands tremble slightly. He grabs the straps of his bag, trying not to show how distress he feels now and stop trembling.

“What? What are you talking about?” He turns back slowly and asks, trying to keep his voice normal but fails to do so because Yoongi quirks an eyebrow, smirking. He bows his head and shakes it, giggling. Kihyun knows he is busted. There is no way he can run from this.

“Are we seriously gonna act like you don’t know what I’m talking about or will we talk what’s going on really?” Yoongi gets up from the wall where he leans on and takes a few small steps to Kihyun, opening his arms to both sides like he is giving him an offer. And if Kihyun didn’t know better he would think Yoongi is bluffing, he is trying to fuck him over or something but Kihyun knows he is genuine. He really asks Kihyun if he wants to throw this matter under the carpet or talk what’s going on. But Kihyun also knows if he avoids this, Yoongi will corner him and ask questions later anyway. Maybe it won’t be that bad if he explains himself. One, he is a team member and two he never did anything to break Kihyun’s trust until now so maybe Kihyun should talk with him.

So he let’s out a sigh and looks at Yoongi who throws him an amused expression. Kihyun takes a deep breath and gestures his friend to follow him into an empty class.

 

 

*******

 

 

“So let me just gather my head around things.” Yoongi massages his temple before he continues. “You slept with the kid upon our bet, we know that.”

“Yes.” Kihyun answers.

Yoongi crosses his arms and Kihyun knows he is in his self-thinking-but-also-judging mood.

“And you are sleeping with him still?” Kihyun told basic things to Yoongi. He didn’t get in too much detail but he is sure that Yoongi managed to get somethings from his words. And the expression he has is so nerve-wracking, he makes Kihyun feel exposed. And Kihyun hates to feel like that.

“Occaionally.” He replies.

“Occasionally?” Yoongi snorts. “Well I wouldn’t say occasionally if I’d fuck with someone on almost once in every two-three day, but what do I know right?” He shrugs an Kihyun glares with an annoyed look.

“Shut up.” He throws another angry look and tries to hide his nervousness. He knows he shows how edgy he is and Yoongi doesn’t help much with that smug expression he has.

Yoongi places his elbows on the desk and rests his head on them, looking away like he is thinking something. It takes a few minutes and he doesn’t say anything so Kihyun asks nervously.

“So what are you gonna do?”

“With what?” Yoongi tilts his head and rests it on his left hand.

“This.” Kihyun shakes his finger between himself and the door, suggesting Changkyun and hoping Yoongi understand what he means. “The things I told you.” He realizes he’s been shaking his leg since God knows when. He stops when Yoongi drops his hands on the table.

“I mean…” The mint haired starts and Kihyun’s heart beats faster.

He is fucked. He knows he is fucked because he bets Yoongi will tell someone. He will talk with someone. What if he tells to a team mate? Any of them? Then what? Everyone will laugh at Kihyun. They will say he is a fucker who falls into the same pit he throws others. He can lose his position as the team captain. No that can’t happen. Kihyun worked so hard for that. He can’t lose it. The title is important. What about his team member’s respects? Will they follow someone who lied to them all this time? Everything Kihyun tried to built for the past three years will crumble down like a sand castle. Everything will wash away and he will have nothing in his hand except mud. And Yoongi will judge Kihyun. He will say all those times he scolded Yoongi for dating Jimin were nothing and he was bullying him, being an awful friend. He will say Kihyun doesn’t deserve to be his captain, his leader because he is liar and a selfish person. He judged people a lot so karma got him. Eventually he licked what he spit right?

Kihyun closes his eyes and braces himself for the disappointment and judgement.

“I plan to do nothing actually.” Yoongi shrugs and that catches Kihyun off guard. Nothing?

“Nothing?” He opens his eyes and leans toward his friend. Yoongi quirks an eyebrow at him.

“Yes, nothing. It’s none of my business that you are sleeping with your crush. I don’t care.” He shrugs again and looks at Kihyun questioningly. “What? Is there something you want me to do?” He asks.

Kihyun surprises when he realizes that Yoongi really asks this question and wait for Kihyun to reply with anything so he can act on it. He will do whatever Kihyun says. So he doesn’t think Kihyun is an awful person. That's so good. Kihyun let’s out a sigh of relief.

“No.” He replies quickly, gathering his thoughts together. “Just don’t tell anyone.” That will be the best for the moment.

“Okay whatever you want.” Yoongi leans back and check his watch. “We have a training in ten minutes cap, others will ask what we were doing.” He grabs his bag from the floor and Kihyun feels a relieve inside his mind and heart. It’s not much, it’s not enough to make him feel at ease but it’s something. Okay Yoongi won’t say anything to anyone and he is still seeing him as his leader. From now on he is Kihyun’s secretkeeper. After all they are teammates. After all Kihyun holds many secrets that belongs to this mint-headed midget. He can keep his crush—

Wait.

What?

 _“Crush?”_ He asks in a shriek and startles Yoongi. “No no no. There is nothing like that.” He shakes his head in denial.

“Hello? Have you not listened what you told me for the past thirty minutes?” Yoongi snorts, clearly finds what Kihyun say is funny but Kihyun is serious. Serious as he can be.

“Are you idiot? Of course I have. I’m the one who tell them.”

Yoongi places the bag on his lap and let’s out a sigh.

“Dude let me just summarize you what I heard from your own lips. You are sleeping with this kid occasionally on a two-three days basis although it was just a one time stupid bet which I’m very sorry to start it. Now I’m thinking that it was a dick move for me to push you but you agreed so let’s just both say it was the work of alcohol and men’s honours was at stake. Anyway, you let him sleep in your bed with you even though you can send him away after you are done but you don’t do that because you are concerned about his health. Public dorms are not like what you think bro. You know when his shift ends and walk him to his dorm because you are concerned about his well-being. You cook him meals when he comes to you. You spend your lunch-breaks in library when he works there part-time. Let me just squeeze that you don’t have to any of these but yeah whatever. So what I want you to tell me is that.. Why are you doing all these?” He crosses his arms and leans back after he is done.

“Because I sleep with him.” Kihyun answers like this is the most obvious thing in the world but he feels uneasy when Yoongi laughs.

“Man you are so whipped. How did that happened?” He continues to laugh as Kihyun tries to process what he said and he denies the moment it dawns on him.

“Whipped? I’m not whipped.” He shakes his head only to replied with “whipped as a cream”

Yoongi continues to laugh for a while and annoys the heck of Kihyun.

“Why are you laughing?” He kicks Yoongi’s knee, not that hard.

Yoongi wipes his tears and gets up from his place. He places a hand on Kihyun who is sitting and looks down at him.

“I know this things are new to you but from what I understand you are just trying cover them. Let me tell you something Ki, you can’t just ignore these feelings you have. You know what I’m talking about. I know these emotions you have are against every fiber of your body and your morals but you have to sort them out. I would like to help if I could but I can’t do that for you.”

“What…” Kihyun starts but Yoongi cuts him of by squeezing his right shoulder.

“Think why you bolted from your place to stop Lee today. Think why you jumped on Cory a few weeks ago. If you find the answer please just decide what to do. There is only two ways this can end and it’s all upto you. It can end bad for you and Changkyun if you won’t make up your mind. I have no idea what he sees in you but you are important to that kid. But I'm more concerned about you because you are my friend and I don’t want you to get hurt so please, sort things out in the best way.” He squezees Kihyun’s shoulder again and leaves him there.

Kihyun feels like a mess. He places his head on the table and squuezes his eyes thightly. No, no he doesn’t want to think about it. He is not that into this feelings. He is not into this weird shit at all. He just plays around. It won’t matter to him if he just stops. Kihyun is just using Changkyun to relieve some stress. He just keeps the kid around because he makes Kihyun feel everything he wanted to feel for all his life. This acke in his heart is nothing. He feels like this because he feels sorry to lose that feeling but he can replace it. He can find someone who will make him feel exactly the same way he’s feeling with Changkyun. It doesn’t have to be him. It can be anybody.

So Kihyun pulls his phone out of his pocket and dials his friend’s phone.

“Hey cap, where are you?” Hyungwon sounds more awake and Kihyun can hear the guys joking amongst themselves.

“I’m coming to the locker room. You guys are there?” He gets up from his place and grabs his bag.

“Yeap. Just get your ass over here. We gotta finish this training so we can go to the club.”

“Start changing. I’m on my way.”

 

 

*******

 

 

If you’ve been to clubs you know what kind of places they are. It’s full of different kinds of people. There are people who seeks company to not to spend that night alone. There are girls who just wants to dance and boys who drinks their worries away. It’s a gathering place for anyone these days. At least that’s what Kihyun thinks from the spot he’s been for the past twenty minutes.

Kihyun and his teammates did come to the bar some time ago, Kihyun can’t remember. After the second beer he kinda lost the track of time. They are having fun though. His friends are all scattered around the bar, dancing and getting wild. Only Jooheon sleeps on a table. Poor boy really can’t take alcohol well.

Kihyun sees Hyungwon ordering another weird shit whatever he is drinking –he called paradise juice but Kihyun is sure it’s just a normal coctail-  Cory is at the second floor, Jin is talking with the DJ. Hyunwoo dances with the girl he’s been eyeing since the moment they walked in. Clearly the girl is interested in him but still she plays hard to get. He touches Hyunwoo’s biceps and giggles but doesn’t let him touch her in return.

How boring.

Kihyun stands next to bar with his fourth? Fifth? beer in his hand, watching the crowd. He was just dancing at the center with anyone he found until he felt the roof started to spin a lot faster than it should have.

“So what do you think?” Yoongi slides on the stall next to his.

He leans back with his elbows, continueing to watch the lights. How pretty they are.

“About what?” He replies.

“What you feel about this stupid arrangement between you and Changkyun, and what you plan to do with it.”

Kihyun blinks a few times. “I don’t think it’s the right place…” He starts but stops when Yoongi punches his shoulder.

“Speak.” He dares.

Kihyun sighs, defeated. “It is wrong. It is so wrong. If mother would know…” He takes a sip from his beer and shakes his head again, this time sad.

“You slept with girls Ki. Do you think your mom would approve that? I don’t think so. Besides she is not here, none of the people that you are concerned who may judge you here. Stop thinking. Just try it or stop this.” Yoongi slurs and his lisp becomes more delibarate.

“Stop? Stop what?” Kihyun looks at him confused.

Yoongi takes a sip from his blue drink and moves closer. “Look Ki. We can just solve the big question in your head real quick. You see that girl with the yellow skirt?” He nudges his head towards somewhere to Kihyun and Kihyun looks at where he gestures. Yes, there is a girl with yellow skirt there. But why is that relevant?

“What do you think?” Yoongi asks.

Kihyun looks at her again, from head to toe. She has red hair that falls on his back loosely. The top tank she wears is a bit tight so her breasts looks puff and full. Her skirt is not mini but something close to that. She has a pretty face and she definetely looks at Kihyun.

“She looks pretty.” Kihyun throws her a smile and she winks in return but she blushes. Kihyun let’s out a giggle and feels pride to charm her even with just a small gesture.

“Okay.” Yoongi pats his shoulder to take his attention and Kihyun turns to him. “Do you see that boy over there?”

And Kihyun again, looks where he shows. A slightly bulked guy with a black shirt is dancing with small steps to a very live song because he throws smiles at Kihyun and Kihyun raises an eyebrow.

“He is into me?” He yelps in surprise and Yoongi shakes his head at his behaviour.

“Go make out with her.” He shows the girl and then points the boy. “Fuck with him or whatever. You gotta understand what is it that matter to you. What do you want? Girls or boys. Maybe both. Go figure it out. Go.” Yoongi shoves his shoulder with a bit force but Kihyun doesn’t bulge so he just gets back to his place when Jimin comes from bathroom(Kihyun supposes). They look cute when Jimin just hides his face to Yoongi’s hair.

Okay that’s irrelevant.

And somehow what Yoongi said makes sense. Now come to think of it, since he started sleeping with Changkyun, Kihyun didn’t even glance at any girl or a boy. Not that he was looking at boys before. Whatever it is, he doesn’t know why he doesn’t do it anymore.

Weird.

Maybe because he is already getting the phsycial satisfaction he need for a long time. But what if that’s all what he wants? He can take his chance with this girl and that boy to see what happens like Yoongi said.

Okay. He’ll try.

He downs his drink and orders another and of course one for the girl. He moves accross the room and he can see the girl’s eyes shine under the spot lights. The music is louder than before when he is next her.

“You look pretty.” He offers the drink and the girl takes it with a foxy smile.

“You look handsome.” She replies and a few moments later Kihyun finds himself kissing her at the corner. She runs her hands from his shoulders to his back and gropes his skin under his shirt. Kihyun licks her lips and tastes cherry, her lipstick maybe. She pulls him more to herself, a little desperately. It’s nice to kiss her but she moves a lot. Still Kihyun feels he is getting hard with her touches.

That’s it.

Maybe that’s what he likes. To be touched by someone. It doesn’t have to be a boy. It can be a girl. He’s been with girls before and he had very good times. He just never considered this because they were just flings but they don’t have to be.

“I live 2 blocks away at the Sundown Apartment.” She whispers, pressing her lips to Kihyun’s ear. “Door number is 4. Meet me there in thirty.” The girl detaches herself from Kihyun who feels dazed and walks away.

Kihyun takes a deep breath, watching the girl go further away and mix into the crowd. The lights are brighter but also darker at the same time and Kihyun feels more sober than he is supposed to be or he wants to be.

He feels a hand behind his back and a laughter comes after it, fading in the loud club music. Hyungwon looks at him with a stupid smile, Kihyun can tell he will pass out if he’ll drink one more of his stupid looking coctail.

“I see you are having fun. I should say I’d have fun too. I mean look at that she looks pretty with that ass.” Hyungwon bumps his shoulder to Kihyun’s, spilling some of his drink to his shirt. “Oh damn. What a waste.”

Kihyun shakes his head in disapprove and gaze at the crowd to find the boy who was eyeing him. He finds him at the other side of the big dance floor, grabs a drink and drags himself there.

The boy has undercuts, a style Kihyun tried a few months ago. Nice. He is a tad more built than Kihyun but he has a sweet smile.

“Hi.” Kihyun takes a sip from his drink. “It’s hot.”

The boy has a mischievous smile. “You are hotter.”

“You thinks so? I’ve seen the way you look at me.” Kihyun tilts his head and throws him a look he knows that is effective.

“I know you do.” The boy holds his hand and pulls Kihyun with him, somewhere dark and press Kihyun to the wall. Kihyun is surprised with the gesture but he doesn’t react and let him touch his body. Normally Kihyun likes to be in control, he likes to start and end things so this is new. He doesn’t sure if he like it but he also doesn’t sure if he doesn’t like it. He just goes with the flow, let him take the lead. The boy is aggressive and kisses Kihyun, touching his panths as he does that and Kihyun moans into the kiss. It’s good and it takes a few moments for the boy to stop to take a few step back.

“You are a good kisser.” He says with a dazed look in Kihyun’s eyes. “Shall we continue this at my place?”

“Why not?” The words leave Kihyun’s mouth before he collect himself.

“Find me then.” The boy pecks his lips again and gives a napkin with an address written on to Kihyun when he does that.

An annoying laughter comes from his right and he sees Hyungwon with a stupid smirk on his face. Why does he have to be everywhere for fucks sake? He must have seen everything and he looks way too sober than moments ago. Kihyun swallows the faint fear in his heart and yells at him. “What?”

Hyungwon shrugs, unfazed with him. “What?”

“Do you have something to say?” Kihyun holds his chin up, trying to look daring but it’s kind of impossible when Hyungwon is the one who looks down on him. Damn beanpole.

“For what? Because you just made out with a guy?” Hyungwon purses his lips and his expression turns to disgust. That’s it. Going with Yoongi’s plan was stupid. Why did he agree to do it? Stupid Kihyun.  Now Hyugwon will say what kind of a liar Kihyun is. He will say he is the most stupid person in the world and they will all turn on him.

“I think it’s disgusting…” Hyungwon shakes his head. “…that I had to see that. Go kiss him somewhere else dude. Now I gotta go pour some bleach to my eyes and say bye to my eye sight.”

Kihyun blinks his eyes a few times and grabs the younger’s arm. He doesn’t sure what he hear. “What? You are not disgust that I kissed him?”

Hyungwon’s face falls into some expression that Kihyun can decipher as ‘You are an idiot’

“Ki-man, I don’t care who you smooch. You can just find a frog and smooch it, I don’t care. None of us care. You are our angry, little friend. Nothing can change that.” Hyungwon’s expression softens, at least Kihyun thinks like that and he feels a small weight leaving his heart. “But let go my arm you freak I gotta go and pour some bleach to my eyes. I’m serious I think that image is tattooed in my eyelids.” He hits Kihyun’s hand and Kihyun takes his hand back, throwing him daggers from his eyes as the taller walks away.

He finds the bar again and sits on an empty chair. He orders a drink and reviews what he did and what the fuck?

What the hell did he just do?

He looks at the empty glass in his hand. The things he did... He didn't just do them because of the burning magical liquid they call alcohol, Kihyun is not that dense to just blame it but he should seriously consider an alcohol ban to himself. It makes him do things he doesn’t think he is capable off.

He feels his phone vibrating in his pocket and sways towards the outside for a quite place. When he is out of the bar he pulls the phone out and curse. He doesn’t know if he wants to talk with anyone but without he can process he answers the call.

“Kihyun?”A woman’s voice calls out his name.

“Hello mother. How are you?” He tries not to slur. Damn alcohol.

“Kihyun dear where are you?” Of course she notices.

Kihyun tries to block the speaker from the music coming from the club and walks away further.

“I’m at my friends, we are watching Saturday Night Live.” He sits on an empty bank.

“I see. I hope you are not wasting your time with parties. You should do well at school. Remember our arrangement. As and Bs for you to study outside of our neighborhood.”

“I do remember mother.” Kihyun shuts his eyes. Of course he remembers. Buying freedom with giving up some.

“I called you to say we can’t make it to your semi-final game, your brother’s play is that day.”

Kihyun opens his eyes, clasping the phone with both of his hands. Unbelievable.

“But… but mother it’s impor—“ He stutters but cuts off by the woman.

“See you at holiday _dear_. Don't hang out until late. Stay clear of alcohol.”

The closing sound of call lingers in his ear until Kihyun lowers the phone and looks at the screen with a disbelief. His mother just told him that they won’t be coming to support him at a very important game. The game that he looks forward. The one he called his mother to say they won the pre-elimination games and they will play at nationals, the moment he was in the locker room, crying.

It’s important for him to see his mother and father at the game because he wants to show that they can be proud of him too. He is succesful too. He may not be his brother, he may not be the son they wish to have but he tries. He tries to make them happy. He wants them to see this but they will not be there when he wishes them to be. Again he is being put behind.

And it hurts so much.

He wipes the tears before they fall and feels nauseous. He rushes to a thrash bin and throws up inside, letting everything out. He then moves away and let’s out a few breaths, letting the wind hit his face. It feels cold and actually it’s nice since his head starts to get clearer. Now that he throw up, Kihyun feels more sober and the conversation he had with his mother sinks in better. The more he thinks the more that sorrow he feels slowly turns into anger.

What a joke.

He just asked one thing. One thing that is important to him and they can’t even do that. What’s so important with that stupid play? His brother is playing that role for three years. They already watched him on the stage millions of times before. Why can’t they just come see Kihyun for once? It’s not much. Kihyun just wanted them to be there.

It’s dissapointing. Kihyun feels gutted and spiteful.

He did everything they asked, everything. And gets what in return?

_Nothing._

But he does everything they tell him to do. Why? Why should he do that?

If his family gives little importance to things that are valuable to him, why should he care what they think? He might as well do whatever the hell he want. He fixes his leather jacket and walks back into the bar. Because he will do whatever the fuck he want.

Stay clear of alcohol?

Yeah whatever.

 

 

*******

 

 

“So?” Yoongi throws his arm around Kihyun’s shoulder when he is ordering his next drink. He throws some mints inside his mouth before he speaks.

“What?” Kihyun takes a sip from his beer.

“What are you gonna do with you know… your options.” Yoongi whispers and it’s stupid if you ask Kihyun because they are in a club with loud music so no one can hear them. What’s the point?

Kihyun thinks for a second about what he did today, what he may do later and finds no guilt inside his heart. He finds no moral either. The anger he has, breaks some barriers he is trying to set to himself for the sake of his family. Now that he decided to do whatever he wants he will just go for it.  You see he is a determined person and if Kihyun wants something he gets it. If he makes up his mind, there is nothing to stop him. Except himself.

And now Kihyun doesn’t want to limit himself. He just wants to do whatever the fuck he wants.

He thinks about the kisses he shared. They were nice. He won’t hide that he liked them both so he just says, “Both I guess. I like them both and I guess both of them liked me as well. So I will just go with the flow. Let my feet take me wherever it wants.”

He will go with the flow.

“Great! Wow that’s a progress. Now you can choose one of them and do whatever you want.” Yoongi smiles at his friend a little more sleepy and Kihyun nods.

Kihyun feels more free. He knows alcohol in his system also boost his courage up but he is also sober enough to know what he wants. He will have fun.

 

 

*******

 

 

It feels weird. Kihyun feels weird as he stands outside the door. He is sure what he is doing but still it would be better if he wouldn’t be so conscious. The alcohol in Kihyun’s system is enough to silence the annoying voice that nags inside his head all the time and annoys him constantly. Maybe that’s why he doesn’t think as he finds his way to this door. Maybe that’s why he has guts to stand at the entrance and lift his hand to knock it. He sways to the left a little but holds the frame and knocks the wood determinately.

It’s quiet outside because it’s almost 2 am in the morning. It was quiet when he left the club. He couldn’t see his friends. No correct that, he saw Hyunwoo pulling Jooheon with him and carrying Hyungwon on his back just before he turned the corner. Kihyun thought Jooheon would be the one they piggyback but it ended up being that beanpole. Idiot.

And after god knows how many minutes, Kihyun stands in front of the door now. Alcohol or not, Kihyun knows he is doing the right thing. Maybe tomorrow it will look wrong. Maybe tomorrow he will try to hide that he did the right thing by saying it was wrong but right now he knows he is doing the right thing. He knows it.

Also the black and white puppy that chased him a few blocks ago agreed with Kihyun with his barks.

Kihyun leans his head against the door and knocks it again, waiting for a reply. Door smells weird and Kihyun draws back examining the dark brown color. Maybe he judged wrong. Maybe it’s not wood. But it looks like wood. Maybe it’s diguised as wood, trying to fake and trick people that it’s wood but it is definitely not wood. Not anymore.

Maybe Kihyun can find what it is if he licks it but before he can move, it opens and a faint light finds it’s way to the outside, blocked by the person who opens the door.

Kihyun cracks a smile. His heart hurts with the sight.

“It’s not wood anymore.” He murmurs to himself.

“What?” A husky, deep voice replies him. “Hyung what are you doing here?”

If only Kihyun can answer that question easily. He really wish to speak his mind but it’s hard when he sees Changkyun rubbing his eyes like a small kid. He has black shorts and gray hoodie on him, his ash blonde hair sticks out from everywhere.

 “You look cute.” Kihyun smiles.

Changkyun looks at him confused. “Okay?”

“You do. You know that right?” Kihyun tilts his head, leaning it to the frame.

Changkyun looks at him for a moment and giggles. “Yeah yeah I do. Tell me something I don’t know.”

Kihyun snorts because he can reply this with many things. For example Changkyun doesn’t know how much Kihyun did drink at the club or what is the root of 344569. No wait, he probably knows it’s 587. The boy has the prettiest brain Kihyun have ever seen. He is very clever so Kihyun is sure he will know anything Kihyun will say. Yeah so instead of replying him, Kihyun just throws himself inside without waiting an invite. After all he is sure Changkyun will ask him to come in and Kihyun will get in so he can just save the younger from asking in vain. Besides when did he ask anything from Changkyun anyway? He just offers and Kihyun takes.

Kihyun hears Changkyun closing the door as he finds a his way to the room he thinks belong to Changkyun. He remembers Changkyun saying something about his dorm buddies will be at home this weekend so he doesn’t feel the need to be careful or silent. Not that he is making any sound though.

He throws himself on the welcoming bed but get hit by papers in the face. He grimaces and gets up holding the book that hit him. It’s physics. Something he both love and hate.

“What the fuck are these doing here?” Kihyun sits straight as much as he can and looks at the papers and books on the blanket.

“I was studying.” Changkyun gets next to him and picks up his belongings on the bed. Good idea.

“It passed midnight. It’s bed time Kyun.” Kihyun blinks as Changkyun takes the bad physics book from him.

“I know but this presentation is bothering me.” Changkyun places the books on his table and organize them by alphabet. Another think Kihyun likes about Changkyun. He is neat.

“Isn’t it like two weeks later? Why are you studying now?” Kihyun asks. It's unnecessary to study this early. But Changkyun is an unfixable nerd so Kihyun can just guess what he will say. He feels uneasy when he rush things so that's why he must have start to study early.

“It was. I changed the date so it’s this Tuesday.” The younger replies and places the books on the table when he is done with sorting.

“Why?” Kihyun is confused.

“Well…” Changkyun clears his throat as he sit down next to Kihyun. “You have semi-final game that week. I wanted to support you as much as I can.” He throws Kihyun a look and his cheeks are getting faintly pink. “And Hoseok hyung of course.” He adds quickly.

Kihyun’s heart drop at his ankles. His eyes burn and there is a fire in his heart. He cups the younger’s head and just pulls him, crashing their lips together. How funny and interesting is that his body moves and reacts a lot faster than his brain can process the words. He presses his lips hard on the younger’s and leans towards him. He moves and sits up so he can kiss better. More fiercely.

He breaks the kiss but keeps the younger’s face between his palms and continues to peck him as he talks.

 “I adore you.” Changkyun’s eyes go wide but he doesn’t stop his kisses. He just cracks a smile. Hurtful.

“Hyung I think you are drunk.” He holds Kihyun’s hands to lower them but Kihyun doesn’t let him.

He thinks for a second. He is not that drunk.

“Promise me Kyun. Promise me you will always love me.” Kihyun whispers to his lips and looks at his Changkyun’s eyes. The intensity in them tugs Kihyun’s heart hard.

“Hyung I think you are too drunk.” Changkyun lowers his gaze and whispers. “Don’t ask things you may regret later.”

Kihyun brushes his lips to younger’s again, his mouth burns hot. Their breath mix together, his sour alcohol and Changkyun’s chocolate taste. It’s like a reflection of their characters, sounds funny when you think about it. Kihyun the bitter one always seeks for the sweet Changkyun. And sticks with him when he gets him.

Kihyun pulls back a little and nuzzles his face into Changkyun’s neck, wrapping his arms around the younger’s middle and rests his head on his chest. He feels Changkyun’s hand tangle in his hair, combing it and melts into his embrace. It feels so nice. Changkyun smells soap and mint. It’s so comforting. Maybe Kihyun can stay like this as long as he can. Maybe until forever.

 “I’m serious.” Kihyun replies when his mind catch up. He holds his head up to look at the younger and forgets how to breath for a second. “I really envy you Kyun. You are so smart. You… you know everything about anything and it’s so fun to talk with you. I like... ” He stops and reaches up enough to brush his lips to Changkyun’s chin and lingers there. “Please just promise me.”

Changkyun shudders with his touches and Kihyun kisses along his neck when he tries to steady his breath.

“Please.” He pleads again, brushing his lips to Changkyun’s. He wants him. It’s not like that crazy sex induced version of himself, this is more of an emotional ask. Changkyun may not understand but it’s important to Kihyun. There was no one on his side except himself until now. Now he has Changkyun. And he wants to keep him by his side. “Kyun.” He presses a kiss on his soft lips.

_Begging._

“Whatever you want hyung.” Changkyun replies between short breaths. “You know I will do anything for you.”

Kihyun’s heart tightens. His bones are on fire, his skin his burning. He wants to shower this boy with everything he has.

He feels sorry. Sorry for not being just to him.

“I’m sorry that you met me.” Kihyun whispers and reaches Changkyun’s lips with his own. Even though the alcohol numbs him, Kihyun’s every fiber shakes up with the kiss and he kisses the boy until his lungs start to burn.

He draws back to get some air. He feels dizzy. Changkyun also pants heavily to get some air.

Kihyun takes a breath, he squeezes his eyes tightly and opens them. “I have many things but actually they are not mine. At first I didn’t have anything but then I started to get things and they made me happy. They are still making me happy. And then I have something different but it wasn’t supposed to be mine at the beginning. It was something I never thought I would have because it was wrong. I was told it was wrong. They thought me like that. But now… I still slightly think it’s wrong but I think I don’t care anymore. I want it. I don’t know what I’m doing but I want it.”

He stops and looks at the younger, waits for him to say something and Changkyun just lifts his eyebrows, purses his lips.

“Well I can’t say I followed what you said but if you want that _something_ to be yours, then go for it.” Changkyun’s fingers in his hair makes Kihyun dizzy but not more than his words. His heart clench with the softness in Kyun’s eyes. Seeing that adoration in his eyes makes Kihyun want to be the person he wish he can be.

He stares into the younger’s eyes until he feels as though he is falling into him. And he does.

“I am.”

Kihyun whispers to Changkyun’s lips and crash them with his own without waiting a second. He just kisses and kisses him, can’t get enough of him. He wants to touch him, he wants to feel if his skin burns like Kihyun’s so he slides his right hand under the younger’s hoodie and presses Changkyun to himself with the left one. He caresses everywhere he can reach. The younger’s skin is soft as silk over unyielding muscles. Changkyun whispers against his lips and arches his hips to grind against him.

It’s so sweet and hazy and hot. Changkyun feels hot.

He burns too.

Kihyun tugs the sweatshirt and pulls it off from younger. Changkyun helps him with his clothes and when he gets rid off his stupidly tight pants and shirt, he pulls Changkyun to himself again and pins him under. Changkyun grabs his shoulders, he leans forward and they kiss more. The desire to be with Changkyun becomes unbearable and Kihyun feels more desperate each passing second. He bites and sucks the younger’s lips hungrily, very sure that they will be puffy next morning. Changkyun runs his hand along with Kihyun’s spine, giving him trembles. He tangles his legs to Kihyun’s and makes it hard for him to go away. Not that he wants though.

Kihyun draws back to get some air, his head spins. He dives back, continue to abuse the younger’s lips and reaches out blindly for the lube. Changkyun giggles into the kiss and Kihyun’s heart flips at the sound. The younger pulls the drawer next to bed and hands the lube and condom to the elder. Kihyun draws back again and pour some lube in his hand, slicking his fingers with it. Changkyun tugs his hair and licks his neck, pressing kisses on his veins. Kihyun shivers with kitten like touches, the feeling is amazing. It’s just amazing. Kihyun is already hard as a rock but still he opens the younger slowly, careful to not hurt him as he presses his fingers in one by one. He licks Changkyun’s chest, pressing his tongue on the faint marks he left a few days ago. Changkyun’s fingers in his hair tightens when he does that so he continues to lick and bite his chest, making new red marks and let them crown on the younger’s milky skin. He pulls out his fingers when he knows the younger is ready, he can understand that after all the sex they had and rolls the condom on his crying dick, hissing with the touch. Changkyun wiggles under him, lifting his ass a little for Kihyun to get in more easily as he nibbles with elder’s neck. Kihyun holds his knee a little high and enters him in one go.

“Oh fuck.” He lets out a sharp breath when he is totally in and tries to catch up some air. Changkyun pants quickly and Kihyun moves without waiting. He slams inside the welcoming hotness by moving hard and quick. Changkyun is wrecked under him. He begs and tries to press kisses every place he can find. He tells how good Kihyun is and how lucky himself. Kihyun watches his expression carefully. His eyebrows are knit together, his cheeks are pink and slight sweat is glistens on his skin. Still even during this crazy moment, he looks so pure and small.

Perfect.

So perfect.

And _Kihyun’s._

He belongs to Kihyun.

He promised.

With that Kihyun reaches his limits, giving into bliss after a few more slams until his body falls apart.

He drags Changkyun closer to himself, holding his wrists with one hand while he kisses and strokes him through his orgasm, telling him that he is perfect. He wants to remind him that he is _his_.

And it’s clear to Kihyun. He knows what he _wants._

“I choose you.” His voice vibrates through the younger and he shudders and arches under him. Changkyun looks up unfocused. Kihyun doesn’t know if he heard him or not but it doesn’t matter. He made up his mind.

“You are so good Changkyun.” He presses a kiss on the younger’s forehead and slips out. “You are so good to me. Thank you.”

Changkyun grins at him. “My pleasure.”

Kihyun takes off the condom and ties it, throwing it the trash bin next to drawer. He takes a few tissues from the drawer and wipes the younger hastily and pulls the cover on them, they can clean up properly later. He just wants to doze off, wrapped in after bliss. He pulls the younger to him with one hand and tangles his other hand in his hair. He strokes the soft ash blocks aside so he can press his lips to his forehead.

Changkyun nuzzles his nose to Kihyun’s neck and Kihyun can feel his short, warm breathes on his skin. Kihyun combs his hair until Changkyun’s breathing becomes steady. He throws a leg over the younger’s bare skin and brings him closer, not letting him go from his embrace.

It’s so amazing for Changkyun to fit so perfectly with his body, Kihyun thinks. It’s like they are two pieces of the same puzzle and Changkyun fills the empty parts of Kihyun.

Kihyun will talk to him maybe tomorrow or maybe later but this time for real. Maybe it won’t be a bad thing if he just take that step.

“I like you.” Kihyun whispers before he follows the younger into the pitch black slumber and his mind holds a few not vocal words as well. _“Here something you don’t know.”_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun is a bit complex and it's hard for someone to change his ideas immediately so I hope you can understand why he is hesitant and persistant at the same time.  
> Tell me what you think!!


	6. 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my dear changkinators!!!  
> I hope you are all doing well, I'm good if you wonder lol  
> Thank you for comments and kudos I really appreciate them!!  
> Have fun and tell me what you think^^

It’s really hot.

The sun will set in a few hours, the wind blows too but the weather still has that sweating effect. Not with Kihyun though. He has different things that can cause sweating effect on himself. Like watching Changkyun trying to score a basket over thirty minutes.

“So what did you say to your manager?”Asks Kihyun, taking a bottle from the grass and take a sip from it.

“About that customer?” Changkyun holds the basketball with one hand, pressed it to his hip and opens his hand to ask the bottle.

Kihyun gives the bottle to him and nods.

And Changkyun nods too, shaking the bottle and causing water spill on his face. Kihyun giggles, wiping the drops from the younger’s chin with his thumb.

 “I talked with my manager and I said it was unfair for that lady to act like how she acted. Yes I forgot to bring sugar with her coffee but so what? I said I’m sorry. She didn’t have to call my superior and yell at me for not doing my job properly.” Changkyun pouts, remembering how bad he felt a few days ago. It was a stupid situation and Kihyun didn’t think that customer would make this a big problem but now every time she goes to that cafe, she specifically asks for Changkyun to serve her and torture the poor kid. Changkyun doesn’t say anything but even Kihyun knows it’s exhausting.

“Don’t get upset Kyun-ah, you work so hard. You manage school and work together, I admire you for that you know?” Kihyun holds the younger’s hand, brushes his thumb over his hand’s back.

“I know I know.” Changkyun nods, pink adorning his cheeks. So cute.

“And your boss should solve this problem otherwise I’ll talk with her myself. She has no right to upset my baby.” Changkyun blushes a little more and Kihyun let’s out a chuckle. He takes the bottle from younger and gets away from his way.

“Let’s change the subject. So tell me, do you feel nervous?” Changkyun asks curiously. He opens his legs a little, putting one foot ahead. He lifts the ball and throws it. And what are the chances, it goes inside the net. Wow. Changkyun turns to look at Kihyun who watches him from a few steps away and throws him a happy smile. He managed to get the ball inside the net for the first time today. Kihyun shares his happiness, he opens his eyes so wide with joy. He catches Changkyun in his arms and turns the kid around himself.

It’s so fun to see Changkyun happy. He radiates this weird vibe that makes Kihyun happy too. He almost feels the same things when he started to play with the ball. The first time he managed to throw the ball properly flashes before his eyes. He was on the verge of crying when the ball go through that hoop. He did run around the court on his own because he was alone, he didn’t have anyone to show off. His brother or father didn’t play with him because he was so bad at it. Now Kihyun realizes it’s so stupid of them to think a kid could learn how to play basketball at 5 and be good at it. And on top of that Kihyun was a small kid, he barely held the ball in his arms, let alone throw it to the net. But he never gave up, because that’s how he is. So he played on his own, trying to get better at the game before he decided to join the auditions.

Once he was a small kid who couldn’t throw a ball properly and now he is a captain of a high school team and he will play at nationals. It’s like a dream come true.

And he has the prettiest apprentice now. Changkyun’s glasses sit on the tip of his nose and his cheeks touch them when he smiles. Like they are touching now. Kihyun wants to go and pinch them so he just does. He grabs the younger’s cheeks between his fingers, pinching the soft skin. Changkyun startles but smiles, squeezing his eyes.

“I did it.” Changkyun giggles. “Finally.”

Kihyun’s chest swells with pride. He managed to teach Changkyun something. That makes him feel proud.  Of course he teaches how to play to the amateur players in his team but at least they know the basics of this game. Changkyun however had no clue until Kihyun show him some moves and it’s small but it’s a satisfying thing to Kihyun. Makes him feel proud. After all he is not the captain for nothing.

“I’m proud of you.” He squishes Changkyun’s face between his hands and places a loudy kiss, giggling. He let’s go the younger after that, grabs the ball from where it landed and turns around himself remembering Changkyun asked him something.

“What for? Why should I feel nervous by the way?” Asks Kihyun as he walks towards to Changkyun who waits open armed for him to give the ball. He must have feel eager to try and see if he can throw the ball again.

“I was talking about the semi-final game. It’s in a few days. Are you nervous?” Changkyun replies the elder as he takes the ball. He takes the position again- the one Kihyun showed him at their first and last practice. He throws the ball but this time it falls short. Kihyun giggles but he tries to hide his amusement when Changkyun drops his arms next to his body with a pout.

This is the first time Kihyun tries to teach Changkyun how to play basketball properly since their well, thrilling sex in the backyard. On these grass. Wow, memories. Kihyun tried to teach him how to play a few times more but either he got distracted by a certain clumsy boy or he just didn’t feel like playing and each and every single one of them ended with Kihyun pulling the younger inside, on a softer ground. It wouldn’t be a lie to say Kihyun sometimes think and get off with those memories when Changkyun isn’t around. This time too, it’s really hard for Kihyun to focus. He feels like he is having a challenge. It’s like Changkyun wears those black short shorts to drive him nuts. He has longer shorts, the ones that reaches until his knees, not just long enough to cover his ass but no, Changkyun just has to go and pick this small ones. And that red sleeveless shirt. If you would ask a hundred person, all of them would say it’s a crop top, not a shirt because it looks like a crop top more than a shirt. Everytime Changkyun lifts his arms to throw the ball, damn shirt slides up and reveal his tummy. It’s like he is doing this on purpose, to test Kihyun’s patience. To test him. His exposed arms are especially looks so soft and Kihyun knows they are soft. He knows they are like well made dough. Soft and firm. That’s why he wishes to run his fingers on Changkyun’s smooth, lean biceps, kiss and bite. He wants to untie Changkyun’s hair that he tied with a man-bun and run his fingers in the blonde strands. He is this close to throw the ball aside and throw Changkyun on his bed. Or maybe on the sofa.

Yup, there goes his teaching basketball to Changkyun ideas. _Again._

Changkyun who is clueless that Kihyun lost his interest in their practice, again, opens and closes his fingers, asking for the ball cutely. Kihyun does what he asks, gives him the orange ball but not without brushing his fingers to younger’s left arm as he walks behind him.

He smirks when Changkyun shivers.

“Why would I be nervous? I know we will win.” He continues their chat but drops his voice a tone lower. He leans towards the younger’s space from behind like they are not alone at his backyard. Like it’s not silent. Like Changkyun won’t hear him if he just talk. “I always win.”

Changkyun scoffs in surprise and his arm tremble when he throws the ball. He fails.

“Why? Don’t you believe me? Carathigh plays good but our team have me.” Kihyun walks back, opening his arms like he shows himself. He grabs the ball from the corner and takes it to the younger again.

“No. No, of course I believe you. It’s good that you are so confident about this.” Changkyun takes the ball back with a pout. He must have feel bad because he was going so good. Kihyun wants to cheer him up so steals a peck from his lips and Changkyun’s cheeks turn pink in instant.

Kihyun cradles younger’s face in his hands. “I know how to play this game, of course I’m confident. It’s an instinct. Just like how I knew we'd win against Onehigh at quarter finals. And it’s like when you see a math problem and guess you’ll solve it before you try. You know you are gonna solve it because you are smart. And brilliant. And clever.” Kihyun places pecks to younger’s soft lips with every last word, causing Changkyun to giggle. He draws back all of a sudden, leaving Changkyun with pouty lips. “You know what? If you manage to throw that ball, I’ll let you kiss me.” Kihyun takes his hands back, enjoying Changkyun getting flustered as he takes a step to the side.

Changkyun blinks a few times, then he nods daringly. He looks determined, eyes on the hoop. He holds his slim arms up and throws the ball.

The ball bounces back from the net.

Changkyun closes his eyes, frowns with disappointment. His shoulders slump down like he is some kind of a kid. Kihyun laughs at his gestures, feeling his frustration.

“No luck.” Changkyun sighs with a pout on his face. A few strands escape from his man-bun, so he unties it, running his hand through his hair.

Nope.

That’s it.

Kihyun reaches out, grabbing his wrist and pulls the younger behind him. Changkyun yelps but he doesn’t say anything when Kihyun opens the door that connects kitchen and backyard. Kihyun gets inside, turning around when they are in and pushes the younger towards the kitchen table. Changkyun throws his hands around his shoulders, tangling his hand in his hairs as Kihyun presses his lips to Changkyun’s. Changkyun lets him kiss himself for a few moment and then tilts his head to deepen the kiss. Kihyun slides his tongue along Changkyun’s lips and then delving in and caressing his tongue with his own.

“I thought you said I could kiss you if I could throw the ball right.” Changkyun pants, his eyes are half open as he tries to catch his breath when he draws back to get some air.

“I did say if you could you can kiss me. I didn’t say anything about me kissing you.” Kihyun smirks and catches the other’s lips again. He slides his hands along Changkyun’s body and hoist him up from his bare thighs to make him sit on the table. Changkyun wraps his legs around Kihyun’s waist and drags him against himself. His lips are so soft and sweet.

Kihyun’s hands tug Changkyun’s shirt desperately. He reaches down, palming the younger’s crouch and Changkyun drops his head to his shoulder, pressing his forehead with a moan. Kihyun trails kisses to the younger’s chin to his ear as he pulls his idiotic short shorts enough to pull his cock out. He feels the heavy, smooth member in his hand and gives a few strokes. Changkyun’s nails dig in his nape and shoulder when he does that so he smirks, continuing the gestures. He slides his hand from tip to the base, squeezing. Changkyun moans and grips him more tightly as Kihyun’s tongue caresses his skin and he sucks on his neck. Changkyun gasps and he trembles slightly. His skin fans on Kihyun’s neck. He’s close. Kihyun tugs him a few times more, feeling Changkyun’s body tense under his touch and spill in his hand with a deep groan. His body goes limp and Kihyun hugs him, still pressing small kisses on his shoulder.

After a few moments of silence Changkyun slides a hand down Kihyun’s torso, seaks out his shorts and starts slipping his hand inside. Kihyun’s hand holding his waist pulls away and closes around his wrist, stopping the younger’s hand.

“It’s okay.” Kihyun mutters, despite how hard he is, he rejects. He places a kiss on the younger’s temple. He just wanted to do this for Changkyun, he wanted to make him feel good and that’s it.

“You know what?” Changkyun tries to catch his breath. “If you win that game I’ll return the favour.” Kihyun draws back, lifting one eyebrow to the younger who smirks at him.

“Oh you will.”

 

*******

 

The whistle blows out.

Monhigh wins the semi-final.

When Kihyun throws the last ball and it goes in the net, he turns to the audience, eyes immediately stucking on the person he’s been looking at since the game did begin. Ash- blonde haired boy jumps in his place happily, cheering for them. For him. Their eyes meet and Kihyun lifts one eyebrow, tongue sticking out with a smug attitude as he smirks at the younger.

_“Your turn.”_

 

*******

 

“Let’s play a drinking game!” A very happy voice says, along with the sound of claps. Kihyun takes a sip from his beer, throwing looks at his friends from the chair he’s been sitting fort he past half an hour. He checks his friends expressions to see if they are interested in playing. Some of them shrug, muttering okay and the others join naturally anyway. They celebrated their victory how they always celebrate, by drinking and eating. Team went to eat something, chicken and beer because their captain is a chicken freak and after that they came to Kihyun’s house for the second round. Kihyun doesn’t know why Changkyun and Minhyuk are with them, he guesses Hoseok invited them but he’s glad that they are here. Kihyun is glad that _he_ is here. And for his other friend… Well how Minhyuk can be this energetic after 3 beers is a mistery to Kihyun. It seems like this guy just consists from little energy balls and nothing can take away his enthusiasm.

“Ugh what an annoyance.” Hyungwon rolls his eyes when Minhyuk chirps but he leans to the front, sitting better.

“Oh what a coincidence. I think the same thing when I watch you playing with the ball.” Minhyuk snorts and rolls his eyes too.

Kihyun can already guess how this will resolve so he waits for Hyungwon to say some spiky words but he doesn’t do that. His tall friend silences for a moment and raises an eyebrow. “So you watch me at the games huh? Interesting.” Hyungwon takes a sip from his beer with a smirk and Minhyuk turns a shade darker.

Minhyuk folds his legs under him, sitting more straight like he’s not the one whose cheeks burn bright. “Anyway… We will say something and those who did that something will drink and those who didn’t will not drink. Clear?” Minhyuk looks at everyone and they just shrug and join the game because everybody love learning other ones dirty secrets. Besides Kihyun can’t wait to see Hyungwon’s drunk ass, maybe take photos and make fun of his stupid secrets tomorrow. It’s the core of their dynamic, exposing each other. That’s how they function. Like Tom and Jerry, always chasing each other and never leaving the other one breath even just for one second.

Yoongi comes from kitchen, gives everyone small cups and fills them with beer. “Okay we are ready to go.”

“I’ll start.” Cory says, sitting on the edge of his chair. Kihyun doesn’t know why he’s here. The sight of him annoys the elder. Still he doesn’t say anything since it’s their victory night. He wants everyone to have fun so he lets him play.

“I think our librarian is hot.” Cory says, looking around him to his members.

“That’s too easy man.” Hyunwoo drinks and everybody laugh at the elder because their librarian is double of Hyunwoo’s age and no one but him thinks she still has that charming aura.

“Oh I’ll say one.” Jimin clasps his fingers together, thinking for a moment. “I cheated on an exam.”

“Dude come on.” Jooheon says drinking his cup.

“I guess I’ll just drink the whole bottle.” Hyungwon let’s out a huff, swallowing his beer.

So with that, everybody drinks their small cups- except Changkyun. That doesn’t go unnoticed by Kihyun but he knows what kind of a nerd the younger is. Still he winks at him when Changkyun looks in his direction and blush when he realizes Kihyun looks at him.

“I did skinny dip!” Hyunwoo takes his attention and Kihyun throws a glance at Yoongi who shakes his head and drinks up so he bottoms up his drink too. They did go to swimming last summer, it was fun. He looks around and sees Changkyun looking at him, like he said something interesting and smirks at the boy. Changkyun laughs with a careless attitude. Kihyun gestures his head towards the younger, eyes roaming on Changkyun’s body and see him duck his head to Minhyuk’s shoulder under his gaze. He is so cute. Maybe Kihyun will take him to skinny dipping some day.

“I think we will win the final of the national game this Saturday.” Hyungwon says and everyone drinks. They all laugh at each other with proud eyes. Kihyun likes the confident his team has, it’s so assuring.

“That’s my team! We will win the final and get that cup!” He raises his beer and his members follow his gesture, they all raise their beer and take a sip.

“I slept with a college girl.” Kihyun says out loud after their little victory celebration moment, wiggles his eyebrows and drinks. He misses the surprised look on Changkyun’s because he is too focused on the person he stated this fact for.

Hoseok rolls his eyes, drinking his cup with a frown. “I should have never told you that.”

The others giggle when the elder throws a threatening look to Kihyun who looks totally not intimidated by that.

“I’m in love.” Minhyuk blurts out and Kihyun scoffs. This is the classic statement people make when they play games like this and a few always drink. It’s an easy question. Jooheon pouts sadly and drinks his cup. Poor kid must have remember his ex-girlfriend, the one who dumped him for a tennis player. Tasteless. Kihyun should introduce him with other girls, maybe Hyunwoo and he can take Jooheon out for a boys night. His eyes stuck on the couple next to him, Yoongi and Jimin giggle as they down their drink. They don’t bother Kihyun, not anymore so Kihyun feels more comfortable as he teases his friend because now Yoongi knows Kihyun is just joking, he is not serious. So when Kihyun points them and laughs at them, he earns a smack on his thigh with a “shut up” but he doesn’t feel offended. He doesn’t mean it after all.

He looks around, watching his friends drink their cups one by one but Kihyun freezes when he sees Changkyun lifts his cup and press it on his lips secretly behind Minhyuk’s back. He throws a look at Kihyun. That look doesn’t even last a millisecond, it’s such a short span of time. He probably thinks Kihyun didn’t notice and he wouldn’t, if Kihyun’d look another place but he sees it. Kihyun sees the shyness in Changkyun’s eyes as Changkyun drinks his cup in one go. He fidgets with the cup before he puts it on the ground for Minhyuk to re-fill it.

Kihyun’s eyes go wide in a second and he blinks faster than he ever did in his life. His heart starts to hammer in his chest towards his ribcage. A very warm-almost hot- feeling spreads inside his chest. It’s like his heart is pumping warm milk and Kihyun can feel it inside his veins as they travel.

Kyun… He just… He is in love? With… Kihyun? And he just gestured it deliberately?

Kihyun tries to process the situation. It’s just… So fucking amazing. Kihyun knows the younger likes him A LOT and he also knows it’s more than just _like_. It’s something more but hearing it out loud feels so different. It’s just so much.

But he is not the only one who notice the younger’s behaviour.

“Kyun-ah are you in love?” Hoseok sits next to Changkyun whose eyes are half closed already and asks silently with a surprised expression as the others play the game.

Uh-uh.

The younger blinks his eyes, trying to focus what he is gonna say. “I guess.” He replies.

“With who? Is he from our school?” Hoseok scouts closer next to the younger and Kihyun tries harder to hear their conversation. He feels his hands getting sweaty, his heart starts to hammer in his chest in a different way this time, with fear.

Changkyun doesn’t reply the elder, he just shakes his head and nods his head with a smile. He leans on elder’s shoulder, eyes closed. He looks so cute.

“So he is from our school but you won’t tell me who he is. Well, tell me why you love him then.” Hoseok pokes his cheek, curious.

“Well…” Changkyun slurs. “I can’t pin point why I love him but… I just admire him a lot. He is like a superman. The passion and the fire in his heart is so… so… I find it so admirable. Whenever I look at him, I remember if I try and work hard enough I can manage anything. That’s why I endure many things.”

“He must be a good person.” Hoseok smiles, wrapping his arm around younger’s shoulders, letting him get comfortable.

Kihyun‘s heart turns into something much more heavier compared to a muscle. It weighs on his chest like an elephant is sitting on him. He takes a sip from his beer, hoping the crushing feeling go down with the drink but it doesn’t work. The way Changkyun thinks about him… The way he highly thinks about him… It’s just so sad and beautiful at the same time because Kihyun doesn’t know if he is the person Changkyun says. He thinks Kihyun is a good person, he is not. He thinks Kihyun is so passionate but Kihyun faintly knows that he directs his passion in the wrong ways. He is not the person Changkyun thinks but now, he wishes to be. He wants to be better and do better without selfish reasons because he liked the man Changkyun just described. In Changkyun’s eyes, Kihyun is capable of everything if he sets his mind on something.

And actually, that’s what Kihyun wanted to achieve since he was a kid. To be seen worthy of something. To be seen succesful at what he does. To be loved by someone unconditionally. To be someone’s most precious.

And Changkyun thinks he is some kind of a superman.

_That kid._

He just wants to get up and kiss the younger’s lips until they bruise but it’s impossible when they are in a room full of people. Besides he literally snuggled up to Hoseok- much for Kihyun’s dislike. He feels jealous when Hoseok brushes his fingers to the younger’s arm and places a kiss on his head. Kihyun bites his lips in annoyance. He doesn’t wish to do something he will regret later so he gets up to get extra beers and Yoongi tails him with empty bottles. He throws them into the trash bin as Kihyun opens the fridge, taking out a six pack and he holds the door, letting Yoongi do the same.

“Are you gonna talk with the kid?” Yoongi puts his six pack beer on the table. Kihyun mentally claps himself for buying more beer as he opens the pack on counter because Hyunwoo drinks like a bear. Kihyun specially bought the brand he likes and he’s watching his friend’s smiley face since the evening. He’s been with this guys since the first year so he knows them like the back of his hand. Just like he knew Yoongi would ask this question when he’d catch Kihyun alone.

It’s a reasonable question. One Kihyun asks himself almost on a daily basis but he can’t just find an answer.

Kihyun thought how he should talk with Changkyun since that day he showed up at the younger’s door. He tried to talk with him a few times but he doesn’t know how to start. Sometimes he mumbled somethings and Changkyun laughed at him or he just used his tongue for kissing the younger instead of talking. Believe it or not but this is a first for Kihyun. Normally he wouldn’t just go talk with a girl he like, they would just fall into a pattern until Kihyun feel bored but with Changkyun however he wishes to talk with the younger and maybe find a name to this thing they are having for weeks. He is certain that he will talk with the boy. He just doesn’t know when or when. So he nods to his mint haired friend.

“He said he is in love.” Yoongi separates the beers from the plastic.

“Yes he did.” Kihyun replies. He heard that loud and clear. With a thumping heart.

“We both know he was not talking about Drake.” Yoongi says.

Kihyun scoffs. “I don’t know, he might be. That kid loves Drake a lot.” Kihyun shrugs with a smug expression. Changkyun really is a big fan of the artist. He made Kihyun listen some of the songs he liked and Kihyun may or may not download them to his list.

Yoongi stops pealing the cover off from beers, throwing him a look.

Kihyun rolls his eyes to his friend. “Of course I know it’s me.” He states.

“Doesn’t it scare you? The reason you started to sleep with him was a stupid bet we made.” Yoongi tilts his head.

Kihyun turns around, leaning to the counter. He looks at his friend who expect him to say anything. He thinks about that since the moment he heard the indirect confession from Changkyun’s pretty lips and to be honest he doesn’t feel bothered with it. Because he already guessed it. Long before this night. Long before Changkyun did drink that small cup.

The way Changkyun looks at him, the way he talks, the way he kisses Kihyun. It’s so obvious.

“No.” Kihyun replies with a certain tone. “Nope, it doesn’t scare me at all.”

Yoongi leans back to the table, crossing his arms on his chest. “It doesn’t?” He lifts his eyebrows in surprise.

“It doesn’t.”

“Why? Do you feel something for him? Are you in love?” Yoongi tilts his head, eyebrows high, almost touching his hair-line.

“I guess.” Kihyun replies smiling, remembering how Changkyun replied Hoseok minutes ago.

 “Guys where the hell are you?” Their conversation interrupts by Hyunwoo who walks in the kitchen with empty bowls in his hands. He puts them on the table, turning to the standing duo. He places his hands on his hips, looking around. “Where is Changkyun?”

Kihyun looks at him confused. “Why would he be here?”

Hyunwoo shrugs. “He said he’d come check on you but I doubt if he’d find the right room. That kid was so wasted.”

“No hyung, he didn’t come.” Replies Yoongi, shrugging his shoulders.

“Come on let’s go inside. People are waiting for the beer.” Hyunwoo takes four beers and goes back inside. Yoongi takes two and Kihyun takes two, they follow him.

When they get in the living room Kihyun checks around, seeing Hoseok and Changkyun absent. He places beers on the sofa with a confused face.

“Where is Hoseok hyung?” he asks. And Changkyun.

“Changkyun said his stomach was upset so he left and Hoseok hyung said he’ll drop him off to his dorm so he left too.” Answers Jimin, as he takes a beer from his boyfriend. Yoongi throws a look at Kihyun and sits next to Jimin.

Kihyun wonders why Changkyun left without telling him. It does not something he’ll do. Or does it? Kihyun doesn’t know actually. Usually he is the one who tells Changkyun where he is going if he must say. But that doesn’t matter because there are situations you gotta say to the person you are with right? Isn’t this one of those situations? The one he should have say that he is going? Kihyun doesn’t know to be honest. He takes his phone out and checks if there’s any message but nothing new appears in his inbox messages. He types a message to the younger asking if he is okay, if he needs Kihyun he should tell and Kihyun will go to him. Kihyun rubs the back of his head in discomfort, slumping down on the nearest coach. He checks his phone but there’s no reply. A worry starts to gnaw at the back of his head. He looks at Yoongi and see him looking back at him with big eyes. What if Changkyun heard their talk? No, that’s not possible. They didn’t talk out loud. Besides Changkyun was really drunk like Hyunwoo said, he must have felt bad, _again_ , like he said.

But still Kihyun doesn’t feel at ease for all night.

After 3 more hours, Kihyun finally manages to kick out his friends from his house. It’s a school night actually and honestly he has no idea how any of them will be able to wake up and go to listen Mr. Kim. Kihyun looks around, seeing what a mess his living room looks and sighs. Normally he hates to see things all over the place but he feels really tired and he has no energy to clean this place so involuntarily he drags himself to his bedroom. His door is slightly open but there’s no light comes from inside. Kihyun tries to recall if he closed it or not. He usually closes it because his bedroom is out of limits for his friends, especially when they drink. Because he cleaned Jooheon’s mess once, he doesn’t wish to go through that again. So he slowly opens the door, eyes already adjusted to the darkness. He takes small, silent steps and gazes around until a familiar figure strikes his eyes. Changkyun lies on the left side of his bed, face away from the door, hands tucked under his head.

_Changkyun is here._

Kihyun let’s out a sigh of relief. A weight disappears from his chest. He smirks at his stupidness, shaking his head. He worried for nothing, Changkyun must have not heard his and Yoongi’s talk. He feels weirdly happy too, knowing that he wouldn’t go. Kihyun knew Changkyun wouldn’t leave without telling him. He must have come lie down to feel better. What a relief.

Kihyun takes a breath, smiling he takes off his panths and shirt as he walks to his bed. He leaves them on the ground, he’ll pick them up tomorrow. Kihyun sits on the soft mattress trying not to wake the younger but bed shakes a bit with his weight. Changkyun who lies on his right side stirs a bit, he moves his left hand to his middle but he doesn’t turn back to look at Kihyun. Kihyun feels sorry for disturbing him up but he doesn’t wish to cause anymore trouble so he quickly gets under the cover. He pulls the younger in his arms and brushes his nose to the soft blonde hairs on Changkyun’s nape. His hand finds Changkyun’s hand and latches his hands to the younger’s fingers. It feels slightly wet but Kihyun doesn’t dwell on it, it must be sweat or something. He squeezes the younger’s hand, Changkyun’s skin is just so soft. Kihyun loves to touch him. Changkyun brushes his fingers to Kihyun’s and he smiles.

“They said you left but I knew you wouldn’t leave.” Kihyun mumbles with a stupid smile on his face. He places small kisses on Changkyun’s nape where his hair ends and wonders if he can feel Kihyun’s smile. Changkyun smells so nice, like tangerine. So fresh. So sweet. Kihyun can’t just help himself.

“No. I’m here.” A small voice replies him back. It’s faint and comes from deeper. It sounds wrong to Kihyun somehow but he can’t understand why. Maybe it’s because Changkyun was about to sleep.

“I’m glad you are here.” Kihyun plants a few more kisses but his eyes are closing. He feels really tired. Kihyun throws a leg over Changkyun’s, tangling them together. He finds the hem of Changkyun’s shirt, throwing his hand under it, Kihyun massages the younger’s soft tummy. He feels Changkyun’s muscles tense for a moment, before they go loose when his fingers massages the skin. “Does your stomach still upset? Does it still hurt?” He asks with worry. Stomach ache can be a bitch sometimes and thinking Changkyun is in agony, hurts Kihyun too.

Once he wouldn’t care if the kid is sick or not but now he feels like he is ready to fight with his angry blood cells.

“It does…” Changkyun replies with a small voice. It sounds really lifeless. “But it’s gonna be okay. I’ll be okay hyung. Don’t worry.”

“When it’s about you, I can’t help it. You are my precious baby.” Kihyun replies, brushing his nose to younger’s nape. He really doesn’t want Changkyun to get hurt.

“If you’ll get better until sunday, I’ll take you to somewhere. What do you say?” Asks Kihyun, already feeling his mind is getting blank. He feels really drowsy.

Changkyun nods a little, his hair brushes Kihyun’s nose and it’s tickles. “Yeah okay.”

He’s so cute.

“Where do you want hyung to take you?” Kihyun asks, words barely leave his mouth. He has a place in mind actually where they can go on a picnic and watch sunset but he does want to take Changkyun anywhere he wants.

Changkyun doesn’t reply for a while. Kihyun thinks maybe he fall asleep or something as his chest moves slightly as Changkyun breathes in and out. It feels nice.

After a moment he feel Changkyun shake his head once.

“I don’t care as long as I’m with you, hyung.” Replies the younger.

Kihyun smiles, pressing his forehead to younger’s nape before he drifts off.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My baby Kyunnie :((  
> What do you think about this chapter?  
> Tell me please I love reading your ideas and comments!!


	7. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey my dear changkinators!!!  
> How are you guys doing?? I hope you are all well ^^  
> Thank you for kudos and comments, I'm really glad that you like the story.  
> I wanted to update earlier but I also wanted to give you a good chapter so.. it's this late sorry >◇<  
> I hope you like how it's going as well.  
> This chapter has a bit of angst so be prepared, you've been warned :)
> 
> Have fun and tell me what you think^^

Changkyun doesn’t go to the school next day. Kihyun knows he is not at the school, he, himself dropped the kid to his dorm but still, his eyes look around without him noticing. When he passes the classrooms, when he checks out a book in library, when he sits in cafeteria his eyes linger on the door. Maybe because Kihyun is just so used to see Changkyun around all day, doing things. Like how he crunches his nose as he reads a book’s cover to place it on the bookshelf in the library and throws a smile at Kihyun when he realizes Kihyun is taking glances at him instead of reading. Or when he blushes when Kihyun sees him talking with his friends on the hall and winks secretly at the younger. Or when he visits Hoseok after training and bring drinks to him, always leaving one behind for Kihyun, shyly. This little moments are so familiar to Kihyun, they are so normal to him. So maybe that’s why, he feels the lack of their presence. It’s okay though, when Changkyun feels better he will continue to do these.

Changkyun was a bit paler in the morning. He had no appetite, barely eating breakfast Kihyun made for him. Kihyun made pancakes for the kid, he knows that the younger loves the fluffy pancakes so much but Changkyun just poked his breakfast with his fork, only ate small pieces Kihyun forced to his mouth. Words left his pretty lips less too. He was less chatty and dozed off a lot. Kihyun thought, the younger did drink more than his body can comprehend the day before and that’s why he feels hangover. His less cheery mode was the result of sickness and alcohol. Now Kihyun doesn’t get hangover much because he knows where to stop when he consumes alcohol but he remembers how it feels to be hangover. He had headaches all day, couldn’t eat anything properly and he was definitely a lot more grumpy. More than usual. So yes, it’s normal for Changkyun to be weird. Still, Kihyun felt bad when Changkyun was not quite like how he’s on a normal day. Something sour sat on his stomach and it bugged Kihyun a lot.

After their not so succesful breakfast, Changkyun said it would be good if he just go to his dorm to have some rest. Kihyun agreed, offering to drop him off to his dorm but Changkyun rejected saying he just needs to be alone for a while, to rest. Kihyun didn’t listen him though, he took the boy to his dorm, getting a big promise from him to rest until he feels better. He told the younger that he should stay at the dorm but Changkyun said he has a night shift at cafe so Kihyun replied him, if he needs anything he should call or message Kihyun, he will keep his phone charged all the time. Kihyun also said he will pick him up after Changkyun’s shift at the cafe. Kihyun kissed the younger, his lips were a bit chappy and the kiss was quick. Still he felt the warmness of it, the affection. Later that he went to school with a bit of worry and hangover from Changkyun’s lips.

But that was yesterday.

Kihyun called Changkyun around the time his shift ended yesterday at night and Changkyun said Minhyuk will pick him up, so he doesn’t need to come get him. Kihyun couldn’t insist when Changkyun mentioned the elder and not quiet let Kihyun object but it bugged him all night. In the morning, he went to Changkyun’s dorm but his dorm mates said he didn’t come home last night. So Kihyun called Changkyun but his phone was off. He decided to go to school, thinking maybe Changkyun will show up but it’s lunch time now, and younger is nowhere to be seen. Still.

 “If you keep looking like that, I bet you can open a hole in the door. Hopefully to Narnia.”

Kihyun hears Hyungwon say and throws an annoyed look to his friend. Hyungwon’s lips turn into a mocking smile before he picks up his plate, pushing his broccoli in Kihyun’s plate. And he totally ignore the daggers Kihyun throw at him because he pushes away his now-empty-tray and crosses his arms on the table, putting his head on them to sleep.

“I wasn’t going to ask but… What is going on? What’s the matter?” Yoongi leans slightly towards to Kihyun, throwing a piece of bread in his mouth.

Kihyun drops his fork, the chicken wing he’s playing with since forever doesn’t look appealing and he doesn’t feel peachy anyway. “I don’t know. My mind is off for some reason.” He replies.

“Wanna tell me why?” Yoongi asks.

 “I’m curious about Kyun. Didn’t see the kid since yesterday. I called and messaged him but I couldn’t reach him. It’s just… I don’t know.” Kihyun shrugs, grabbing the metal spoon to make circles in his soup bowl.

Yoongi lifts his eyebrows curiously and pulls his chair closer to Kihyun’s. “Maybe he is at dorm?” He suggests.

Kihyun shakes his head, “No, I went there before the school. Woozi said he didn’t come last night.” Says as he drops his spoon into potato mesh. His eyes slip on his phone next to his tray. No light.

So still, no reply.

Kihyun huffs, trying not to show his frustration too deliberately. He messaged the younger when he woke up, knowing Changkyun wakes up early like himself too. He did get dressed, made his bag by throwing his shorts and shirt for their training later. He wondered in the house, having a light breakfast but in the mean time, no matter how annoying is that, he didn’t get any reply. So he decided to swing by to Changkyun’s dorm, ask him how he is but the younger wasn’t there.

Yoongi pats Kihyun’s back, squeezing his nape. “Maybe he went to Hoseok hyung’s. Did you ask him?”

Kihyun furrows his eyebrows and takes a glance around him with the mention of the elder. Hyunwoo, Jin and Jooheon are chatting at the right side of the table, Hyungwon next to Kihyun is dozing off like he always do, Cory plays with his phone and Yoongi talks with him. Huh. He just realizes that Hoseok is not among them. He searches his memory, tries to recall if he saw the elder in the morning but he can’t remember. One of his team member is not around and Kihyun didn’t even realized that. It’s something like having the moon eclipse and the sun eclipse at the same time, aka impossible.

“Yup, Hoseok hyung said he skipped the first period. He said he was a bit hangover.” Yoongi says and shoves his phone to Kihyun’s face. The light of the screen hurts Kihyun’s eyes and he blinks, retreating his head away for a bit to read the messages. His eyebrows knit together when he reads the exchange between Yoongi and Hoseok.

 

**[Hoseok Hyung]**

“Yoongi-ah thank you for asking. I’m at home, feeling slightly bad.”

**[Me]**

“Why hyung? Is there a problem? Want me 2 come over?”

**[Hoseok Hyung]**

“No no it’s okay. I went out yesterday together with Changkyun and Minhyuk but Kyunnie did drink a lot so he wasn’t feel good in the morning and I was feeling a headache so we all decided to skip our classes.”

**[Me]**

“u guys r okay?”

**[Hoseok Hyung]**

“Yeap, we’ll be at school after lunch time. I gotta come for training and Minhyuk has a cleaning duty for the pool area. I gotta hurry up, talk to u when I’m there!”

 

Kihyun reads the conversation once more before Yoongi takes his phone back, locks and puts it in his pocket. “You are welcome.” He says.

Kihyun mutters a thank you and leans back in his chair. More accurately dissolves on the chair. He bites the inside of his cheek, picking up his fork again and starts to play with the small chopped carrots. He feels relieved now that he knows where Changkyun is but his mind doesn’t stop poking him. It’s just annoying, thinking that the younger spend the night in another place with another guys. They may even slept together who knows, Hoseok loves skinship a lot. He always throws his hands around Changkyun, pinches his cheeks or ruffles his hair. It’s just so annoying. For fucks sake, even thinking about this things hurts Kihyun. Maybe that’s not the situation, maybe they slept sepearetly, Kihyun knows he is overthinking this more than he should right now. Hoseok and Changkyun are friends, for a very long time. It’s good to have someone who always watch over Changkyun, and Hoseok just does that, Kihyun assures himself. They are just friends. Just friends. Friends but ugh, Kihyun can’t help feeling jealous. He drops the fork again, catches his bottom lip with his teeth and nibbles the skin on it. He feels angry. To Changkyun, to himself but mostly to Changkyun. Shouldn’t he go to Kihyun if he wanted to drink something? Why go with Hoseok and Minhyuk? Besides he wasn’t feeling very well after the basketball team’s celebration party, why did he drink again? It’s such an irresponsible behaviour. He shouldn’t have done that, see what happened? He feels bad again. And he doesn’t even say that he feels bad to Kihyun. Changkyun just ignores him. He could have reply one of the 38 messages Kihyun sent since the morning, instead of this stupid silence.

The whole thing annoys Kihyun more than it should because he feels like Changkyun doesn’t need him. He doesn’t say he feels bad, he doesn’t say he wants to have a drink. They talk about anything, Kihyun knows many things about Changkyun and vice-versa. But still, Changkyun doesn’t say or ask anything from Kihyun, he just runs back to his friends when he needs something. It’s just so annoying. Kihyun could take care of him too. He didn’t have to go them.

“Ugh please shut up.”

Kihyun snaps his head to his mint haired friend, glaring. “What the fuck are you talking about? I wasn’t even speaking.”

Yoongi rolls his eyes in annoyance. “You are thinking too loud Kihyun. And based on this stupid look on your face that you have right now, I can say you must be angry about something. What? You didn’t like the chicken? Or are you angry that your little prince is with his friends?”

Kihyun frowns but he doesn’t reply. He just shakes his leg, repeatedly.

Yoongi scoffs, shaking his head with amusement. “Oh you are angry about that but you are angry because he is with Hoseok hyung.” Yoongi laughs, sounding a bit higher and Kihyun slaps his knee a bit harsh. “Okay okay… friend, I gotta ask a question to you and you gotta answer me. What is there to be angry about? You go out with us all the time.”

Kihyun shrugs, not quiet understanding what Yoongi tries to go with that. “We are friends.”

“And what are they? Salt and pepper?” Yoongi says and Kihyun rolls his eyes.

“Don’t be ridiculous.”

“You are being ridiculous. So what if he went out to hang out with his friends? Like I said, you always go out. Besides they weren’t alone, that loud white puppy was with them.”

“Minhyuk.” Hyungwon mutters, opening his eyes slowly. Kihyun and Yoongi stop talking, eyes dart to each other with shock. Wasn’t this tall beanpole sleeping? Kihyun knows they weren’t speaking that loud, how did he hear them? Hyungwon yawns, propping his head with a hand, “So what are we doing? Are we talking about Kihyun’s crush on Changkyun?” asks.

Kihyun is shocked, feeling his mouth dry in instant. “How- how do you—“

“Ah please.” Hyungwon rolls his eyes. “I have eyes. Besides once I saw you stealing a peck from the kid when you think there was nobody in the library. But guess what, I was sleeping in a solo study room.” Hyungwon grimaces. “And until this day, it still haunts me.”

Yoongi reaches out over Kihyun and smacks Hyungwon’s nape.

Hyungwon glares at Yoongi as he rubs his back. "Can you just stop being an idiot for one single goddamn second and stop being jealous over Hoseok hyung? You are being the king of assholes and watching you fume with envy when they just do nothing but talk, is not funny anymore." Hyungwon says with a snort.

Kihyun’s mouth hangs open, still surprised with the things he hear. “What?"

Hyungwon lets out a huff. "If only I could take out your brain and slap some sense in it." He scrunches his nose. "Fuck that would be disgusting."

Kihyun rolls his eyes, poking Hyungwon's biceps. They are pretty good for a person who look like he is gonna fly next time when the wind blows. Okay, irrelevant.

"Drop that and get back to the topic will you? Why didn’t you say anything?” Kihyun asks curiously.

“What was I supposed to say? _‘Hey I know you like someone?’_ Or _‘hey I saw you kissing a guy, what up?’_ ” Hyungwon blurts out.

“You know but you didn’t tell anyone else?” Kihyun asks, eyebrows pull together. This situation somehow feels unreal.

Hyungwon purses his lips with a shake. “Why would I? It’s your business. A good gossip topic if anyone would care but sorry dude _contrary to your belief,_ nobody cares about who you sleep with. You gotta work on that by the way, what a selfish attitude. Ouch Yoongi stop hitting me! Anyway, from the things I see and hear and based on the facts like the poor kid is stupidly throws heart on every path you walk on, I can conclude that he loves you but you are hesitant to say your feelings out loud for some reason I don’t know. And you know what? I think it’s normal. This feelings, this emotions and this ideas are new to you. I get that part. And I agree with you also but what I don’t understand, with what right do you think you are getting this much angry?”

“What do you mean?” asks Kihyun with a confused look. What kind of a question is that? Why does Hyungwon ask this? “I sleep with the kid.” He replies like it’s the most deliberate answer.

“So?” Hyungwon cocks an eyebrow. “What right does that give to you? I mean why should he report you anything he does? Just because you fuck him, should he say every breathe he takes to you? Who are you to the kid? Friend? Acquaintance? Boyfriend? Crush? What? What is your title?”

“I.. I mean I’m…” Kihyun mumbles, not quite finding a correct word for this question. He is not Changkyun’s friend. Okay he knows many things about him but he knows about Changkyun more than a friend should know. And he is not a boyfriend, not a crush… not… He is just…

“ _Nothing_.” Hyungwon says with a shrug. “You are nothing at the moment Ki. You have no title. You may be sleeping with the kid but that doesn’t give you any right to say anything or meddle with his life. You have no right. Your thoughts are nothing. You gotta understand that.”

“That’s nonsense.” Kihyun scoffs but his eyebrows knit together.

Hyungwon let’s out a breath. He sits up leaning towards Kihyun and Yoongi.

“Fine. Let’s say you will be something to the kid. Beside a booty call. What is it that you are gonna be?

“He said he’ll talk with him.” Yoongi replies instead of Kihyun, maybe to give him some credit because if they would count the things Hyungwon just said, Kihyun is certain that he will get a minus point.

Hyungwon purses his lips and nods. “That’s fine. Clear everything on your mind and tell him how you feel. What I wanna know is that, you like him and all that yikey sweet stuff, but what are you gonna do? It’s not like you do plan on asking him out.”

“I do though.” Kihyun replies and even he is surprised by the speed of his mouth. “I do.” He repeats like he tries to solidify his reply.

“Oh well, good then.” Hyungwon shakes his head, surprised. Clearly he wasn’t expecting Kihyun to reply him like this.

Yoongi clears his throat, scratching his arm as he jerks his head to their tall member. “Well I agree with Hyungwon about this. Until you talk with him, until he knows what’s his worth to you, you have no right to be jealous. No matter how stupid it is.”

Hyungwon nods. “So better, hurry up.”

 

 

*******

 

 

Team eat lunch and linger in the cafeteria until 2pm, chatting and teasing with each other. Kihyun actually hopes to see Changkyun before their training but he doesn’t. They have a training at 2.30pm and no matter how curious he is about the younger, he doesn’t wish to fall behind of their schedule so he picks his members up from the table and directs them to the sports hall.

Hoseok comes fifteen minutes late to the training, just when the team is about to do stretching moves. Kihyun, as the captain of the team, asks where he was despite he knows the answer very well. Hoseok says he dropped his friends to the pool area and he is late because of that. Kihyun nods, ushering him to change so he can join his team members and Hoseok runs inside the locker room, changing real fast to join them.

They do practice and training until 5 pm. They warm up, throw balls and do basic training until they try something new, specially for their upcoming final game. For the last two days Kihyun tries to come up with a different game strategy for their final game to win it. Team checked their opponents, watched their game videos to see how they play. It was the first thing they do after waking up from the happiness of them being winners of the semi-final. Kihyun and their coach analyzed every player’s playing technique and tried to decide who can match with who, who should play at the first five and which members are dangerous for them to be careful. Kihyun knows his members can block their opponents, they are really good at that but there is just this tiny problem, SevenHigh has two really tall players. Naturally Hyungwon matched with one of them because beside him being their best point guard, always helping others do basket or prevent rivals from having points, he is tall enough. So it’s a proper match for him. But still there is another player, Mingyu they should block, and still Kihyun doesn’t know what to do with him. He is the ace of the SevenHigh and every ball he throw earn points. It’s like the kid has magic hands and the balls curve in the air to get in the net even if they are nowhere near it. Kihyun heard he already received offers from other teams for him to join them, he is that good. It doesn’t matter though because Kihyun is good too. He is really good. So he decided to match with Mingyu. It may be a bit tricky but he and Jooheon can prevent him from finding positions to increase their point in the game and make Hoseok find good positions for two, three point throws. Yoongi usually plays when Kihyun stays on bench, he acts like a co-captain but this time he knows he should asist the game instead of waiting for his turn so he and Cory work on freeball throws, trying to increase their scoring. Jin shows some moves he saw in the game videos to Hyunwoo. They all do create fake scenarios they may come across in the upcoming game and train according to that. At the end of the day, they all groan and whine because it’s hard but they don’t have any bad feeling regarding to the game. Because they will win it.

 

 

*******

 

 

“I just wanna check if he’s there or not. If he is there, I can find some alibi to stay behind.” Kihyun ruffles his hair with his blue towel. He presses it on his shoulders and arms to soak the small drops.

“You are hopeless bro.” Hyungwon says with an amused smile. Kihyun glares at him, pressing his lips together to a thin line.

“Shut up and help me find a reason to walk there.” Kihyun hits Hyungwon’s arm with his towel. Hyungwon rubs his arm with a glare but shuts up. Huh, interesting.

Kihyun grabs his black shirt from his bag and wears it, he picks up towel to dry his hair a bit more. He doesn’t know what reason he should find to get lost without any of his members realise he is not there. Kihyun wants to catch the younger to ask him how is he. It would be really great if Changkyun did just reply any of his messages but since he does not do that, not even send a smiley, Kihyun decides to go and find him instead of waiting and he thinks he can find the kid in the pool. He should be there with Minhyuk, according to what Hoseok said earlier. But in order to do that, he should go to pool area but he doesn’t know how to do that because someone-Jooheon- threw the idea of all of them having a bowling party and everybody agreed, much for Kihyun’s dismay. And he challenged Kihyun for a game because a few days ago, Kihyun bragged about how good he is at bowling, he is like the Michael Jordan of bowling, if he would play bowling. Now he curses himself for doing that but what’s done is done. No use of feeling bitter. Besides the problem is not going to bowling, he will invite Minhyuk and Changkyun to go with them. The problem is, the out gate is nowhere near the pool area. It’s like the opposite way. Pool is so irrelevant to the exit like South pole and North pole irrelevant, so Kihyun can’t find any reason for his members to walk to that way to go outside.

“Okay. I got this.” Yoongi says after a few minutes of them three silently wearing their clothes and turns around to his members, walking to them. “Boys I just forgot to tell you that some of us may have a quiz tomorrow, well um… Mr Cha told me yesterday. So let’s go to the library to pick up some books first.”

Jooheon groans, shoulders slump down because he is not ready for any quiz. Cory curses his luck and says he shouldn’t have slept at the last lesson. Hyunwoo just shrugs and Hoseok just nods. Kihyun tries to contain his urge to say ‘Yes!’ with a high five when Yoongi turns to him, bumping his shoulder to Kihyun’s and laughs.

“Let’s go.”

Kihyun closes his locker, wears his team jacket and zips his bag, throwing it over his shoulder. Closest way to library is in the pool area. So it’s a very good idea. Kihyun mentally notes to treat Yoongi anything he wants tomorrow.

Members ask about the quiz to mint haired member, they are curious about why they have no idea but Yoongi comes up with some lies saying their teacher said this to him yesterday when he was about to leave the school because his car got stolen or something and it’s important and it’s like thirty percent of their grade so they must study. Jooheon almost faints when he hears that.

They tease with the poor kid on their way, talking about which chapters they should study before a thick and annoying laugh reach their ears right before they turn the corner. They stop before they move on and apparently that group near the pool doors don’t realize them because they laugh so loudly.

“That bitch is wet from head to toe now. I hope he’ll get sick.” Kihyun hears someone say with a mock.

“He couldn’t even fight. How pathetic.” Another one laughs.

“And his other friend? Did you see how alert he was when we throw that white haired to the water? He was like a lost puppy, walking up and down around the side of the pool.”

“I guess I saw him jumping in the water a few seconds ago. He probably wants to take out his friend. It’s just water. What can happen for fucks sake?”

“Forget it. He is just a sissy. That’s why.”

“How pathetic.”

“You shouldn’t punch his stomach though.”

“Who cares? It’s not like he does have Kihyun to stand up for him this time too, that prick.”

Kihyun throws a glance to his members when he hears his name. Their expressions says they are surprised as he is. They walk fast to the source of the voices. They turn the corner and see a few player from the american football team stand right in front of the pool doors laughing. They are slightly wet, with no bags in sight. They chat but their smiles die when they see Kihyun and his members.

“What are you talking about?” Kihyun asks, walking up to them and football players squirm back a little. They look at Kihyun and their eyes stuck back at Kihyun. Kihyun doesn’t need to check what are they looking at, he knows his friends are probably looking like the A-team.

“It has nothing to do with you Kihyun, back off.” Says Lee, who stands in the middle of his 4 man group. He has a hostile expression on his face but also he looks afraid for some reason.

Kihyun grabs Lee’s collar and pushes him to the wall next to door. He hears a rush behind him. With the corner of his eyes Kihyun sees Jooheon holding the player on the left-JeongWoo and Hyunwoo holds the other-Hyuk.

“Don’t.” Kihyun hears Yoongi say to the last one when he tries to walk on him.

“What is wrong with you? Why do you care about this nerds this much? First in cafeteria now this… What is your problem?” Lee says, eyes bewildered with fear. He tries to make Kihyun let his shirt go but Kihyun doesn’t even budge. Lee maybe a bulky guy but Kihyun is a tough one. And when he is sturdy no one can take off his hands on the thing he grasped.

“What are you talking about?” Kihyun asks but his mind works fast to connect the dots. Cafeteria? Nerds? Kihyun blinks for a moment when the realization downs on him. Nerds? Cafeteria? Pool? Minhyuk and Changkyun.

Changkyun!

“Damn it Lee, what did you do?” Kihyun punches the guy’s stomach and Lee buckles forward. Kihyun shakes him to his feet. He feels his blood boil inside him in seconds as if horror propelled him. “What did you do to Changkyun?”

“Nothing!” Lee shrieks with pain, face twists with pain. “We just threw his friend into the water, that’s it. It was for fun!! We did nothing to him, he jumped after his friend. They are just wet and that’s all. What’s the problem?”

“You threw Minhyuk in the water? He doesn’t know how to swim!” Hoseok yells with a horror in his voice.

“Changkyun doesn’t know too…” Kihyun murmurs and lets Lee go the moment the situation sinks in him. He bolts towards the pool area, opening the doors. He looks around and sees someone clutching to the side of the pool but his eyes stuck on another person who is in the middle of the water. Struggling, making water splash around and stop struggling.

Oh fuck.

No. No way.

“ _Changkyun!_ ” A bitter scream rips from Kihyun’s mouth. He moves to the closest point where he can reach the younger more easily, throwing his bag and jacket away as he runs. His heart beats so fast. He almost can’t hear his friends’ sounds behind him as they run in due to his heartbeats. Kihyun just throws himself into the water without waiting anything.

The water is a bit cold, Kihyun shivers slightly at the first contact. His clothes soak up the water immediately, Kihyun feels them weighing down him as he moves forward. He swallows some water as he swims to the younger but thankfully he is not that far away so Kihyun catches him. He grabs Changkyun’s shoulders and shakes him, turning his head upwards.

Changkyun doesn’t react.

Kihyun feels like something inside of him trying to tear his heart in shreds. He tries to stay calm, thinks somehow and keeps holding the younger’s head up, calls out to him, tells him to say something but he hears no reply. He tries to move towards the side but his feet can’t touch the ground and no matter how hard he tries to stay calm it’s so hard when you are panicked. It’s damn hard to move with someone within your arms and it’s even harder when they don’t help you. And it’s hard to think about anything when your brain freezes due to horror. And it’s so hard to think when you don’t know what to do except feeling like crying. A big mess.

Kihyun tries to grasp something, anything, until suddenly Changkyun feels lighter in his hold. He feels a difference in the water and an arm wraps around Changkyun’s torso. Kihyun sees Hyunwoo grabbing the younger and he feels a gratitude for a moment as they pull him to the side together. When they reach there in seconds, Hoseok grabs Changkyun by his arms, eyes filled with tears, and pulls the younger out. Kihyun ignores the stinging pain in his eyes as he gets out of the water immediately after him.

“It’s because of me. He just jumped in. He knows I don’t know how to swim but that idiot doesn’t know how to swim too. He pushed me to the side. Oh my god. It’s because of me!” Minhyuk cries, choking on words, clutching Hyungwon’s shirt who sits beside him and holds him in a tight embrace. “Is he okay? Is he okay?” Minhyuk asks between sobs.

Kihyun doesn’t care to reply him, he just gets closer to the younger. “Changkyun?” He whispers, holding the younger’s face with his hands.

Changkyun’s face is so cold.

And there is no response.

No react.

There is no mimic on Changkyun’s face.

Kihyun’s heart shrinks inside his chest. If it would hurt more if he wouldn’t be this alerted, he can just faint due to pain.

“He is not breathing, oh God!” Hoseok starts to sob, shaking a lot. He sits on Changkyun’s other side, hands holding his face.

“He must have swallowed a lot of water. We gotta take them out. Let’s roll him to his side.”  Hyunwoo says, pushing Hoseok away with a bit of force and moves Changkyun without waiting any approval. He rolls Changkyun to his right side and pats his back firmly.

“Please Changkyun please wake up.” Kihyun finds himself pleading, hands grabbing Changkyun’s face, arms, chest, anywhere. It’s so scary. He is so scared. Kihyun doesn’t remember a time that he feels this afraid, this bad. It’s like somebody is stabbing knives in his stomach. Each millisecond feels like a week. It just hurts so much. Changkyun is just… He is just... He should wake up. He gotta wake up. Kihyun has things to say. They didn’t even talk yet. He didn’t even take the kid to the picnic he was planning to take him after the game. He should wake up. He can’t just leave Kihyun like this. Not when Kihyun is sure of his feelings. He loves the kid. So much. So damn much. Changkyun should hear this.

“I love you too. I love you too idiot. Please wake up so I can say this to you.” Kihyun cries, holding Changkyun’s shoulder as Hyunwoo pats his back, rubbing his hand up and down through his spine.

After a few agonizing seconds, water pours from Changkyun’s small mouth and he coffs faintly. He shuts his eyes firmly as he tries to breath, gasping for some air. Kihyun digs his nails to the younger’s arms, feeling himself breaking and rejoining again. He scoots closer, holding Changkyun’s head up with one hand and patting the younger’s back to help him with the other.

“That’s it baby. Breathe. Just breathe.” Kihyun smiles, tears spilling between the water drops on his face. He feels relieved, his arms and feet feel lose. He doesn’t know what to do except hugging the kid. He never felt this happy before.

Changkyun opens his eyes, still trying to breathe properly. “Hyung?” He asks confused. Kihyun’s smile gets bigger, he brushes the younger’s damped blonde locks away gently.

“Yeah it’s me. It’s okay. I got you Kyun. I got you.” Kihyun leans forward, pressing a kiss on the younger’s forehead. He cradles Changkyun’s head with his arms, pressing him to his chest more.

“I knew there was something going on between you two. No wonder why you stood up for him. Now I give you a credit for that day at the cafeteria.”

Kihyun’s smile dies when he turns to look at Lee, who has a disgusting smirk on his face. Jin and Yoongi stand behind the player, watching the scene in front of them. All of his friends probably watch Changkyun and Kihyun but Kihyun doesn’t care because the anger and hate bubbling inside him for Lee, is just too hot to care. The anger just burns in his veins like lava, itching to go out. He makes a move to get up but Changkyun grabs his shirt. He looks scared and confused.

“You two…?” Hoseok says from the other side, voice bearing his shock. His eyes dart to Changkyun and Kihyun repeatedly. Kihyun looks at him, unable to say anything. The surprise and confusion is so visible on the elder's face, Kihyun can almost touch them.

 “Yes they two, obviously. He said he loved him, what else do you think?” Lee snorts and something snaps inside of Kihyun. He softly let’s go Changkyun despite his weak attempts to prevent him and gets up. He let’s out a breath. His body shakes. It just shakes. Some may think it’s due to water and he feels cold but his friends know, Kihyun knows, it’s due to anger. The hot, red feeling covers all his cells and fibers, giving him an enormous excitement along with a scary aura.

Kihyun squeezes his eyes tightly, brushing the droplets from his face with his hand.

“Who did it?” He asks, eyes burning the players one by one. None of them say anything but they don’t need to say anything because Kihyun knows it’s Lee.

“Kihyun let’s just call the teacher.” Yoongi says when he sees the flame in his friend’s eyes.

Kihyun ignores his friend’s suggestion and turns to the bulked player.

“Say you are sorry. Apologize.” Kihyun hisses under his breath. He knows he looks intimidating somehow because nobody dare to move or make a sound. The tension is so high and everybody feel it around them like it’s something touchable. Like they can cut it with a sharp knife.

Lee scoffs but his face falls for a second, he pales visibly but quickly he recollects his smug posture when Kihyun takes a step towards him, getting closer.

“I said apologize.” Kihyun says, pressing on the words one by one.

Lee gulps but rolls his eyes, trying to keep his posture. “Yeah sorry okay? It’s not that big of a deal. Your whore is okay. Can we go?” He waves his hand in the air like he is shooing a bug.

And that’s it.

“Oh no.” Kihyun sees Yoongi mutter and shut his eyes. He tries to come in between Lee and Kihyun but even he knows he can’t stop Kihyun when he is this angry.

Kihyun launches himself forward before his brain can catch up with the moment, using the force of his body to slam his hands into the guy’s chest and push. In hindsight, bad idea, but really it’s just a push, not even much one, really. A hard push but a harmless one. What makes Lee levitate and fall however, is Kihyun’s upper punch, meeting with his chin in two seconds before he can form a word. Kihyun feels the solid bone structure shake on his fist. He straddles Lee with his thighs when he falls, making it hard for him to move his arms. He punches one, two, three times before Lee frees his right arm and grab Kihyun by the collar. He yanks the fabric and Kihyun loses his balance. This gives a leverage to Lee and he sits up, punches Kihyun away. Kihyun feels the left side of his chin burn with an unexplainable pain when he falls on his left arm. Still, he quickly throws himself on Lee, gathers his collar firmly as much as he can and headbutt him, hard. Lee yelps in pain, Kihyun feels his forehead hurt too but he is too pumped with adrenaline to care. Some of Lee’s kick’s hit Kihyun’s sides but he doesn’t care as he punches again, this time Lee’s teeth paints red with blood. He draws his hand to hit him once more but a hand grabs his wrist him from behind.

“Hyung stop!” Changkyun says. Water drips from his eyes, clothes, hairs, chin. His limps tremble, and there is a scared look in his sweet brown orbits. He watches Kihyun with eyes big, opened with shock and Kihyun stops when he sees them, blinking fast.

“I—I just…” He mumbles, realizing the situation in his hands. Literally. Lee looks like he is passed out, because he doesn’t move, eyes closed but breathing. Kihyun however feels out of air, heart beating at his mouth. And he stops breathing for a second when Changkyun slides his fingers on Kihyun’s clenched fist and work his way in it. Kihyun loosens his hold, holding the cold, bruised fingers instead of the fabric. Kihyun feels his heart beating with affection too now, along with adrenaline, fear and hurt. He turns to the younger, hugging him without saying anything. He presses kisses to younger’s neck and cheek over and over. When he feels less on edge, he gets away to look at the younger. To say that Changkyun is stunned is putting it kindly like somebody throw him water again without saying anything.

Kihyun cradles Changkyun’s face in his hands, checking if he is okay. Changkyun blinks a few times before he puts his hands on Kihyun’s hands, trying to take them away.

“Hyung just… Hyung your friends…” Changkyun says, eyes looking around warily.

“I don’t care about them. Are you okay?” Kihyun says sliding his hands to Changkyun’s shoulders, squizing them softly. He couldn’t care less about his friends.

“You don’t?” Changkyun asks, his voice sounds small.

“I only care about you, okay?” Kihyun says, meeting his glance with younger’s eyes.

“I’m okay.” Changkyun nods, teeth hitting together, making noises. He must have feel cold. Kihyun stands up then, a little quick, a little sharp for someone whose blood was boiling at 140 degrees a few minutes ago. He fetches the jacket he did throw on the floor and drops it on Changkyun’s shoulder’s before he pulls Changkyun up.

He then gazes around, seeing what’s going around them. JeongWoo is pinned on the floor by Hyunwoo, nose bleeding. Hyuk’s left hand is twisted to his back and he is hitting his right hand to the floor repeatedly for Hoseok to release his hold on his hand. The other one just stands, Jooheon and Jin next to him, they hold his arms but clearly he didn’t even try to do anything. Minhyuk doesn’t cry anymore, just looks at Kihyun and Changkyun with big, red eyes.

“Guys!” Kihyun shouts to his friends, gathering their eyes on him. He is very well aware of his hold around Changkyun’s middle but he really doesn’t care. “This is enough. Leave this scumbags. Let’s just take Changkyun and Minhyuk.” He says and Hyunwoo and Hoseok let go the players they are holding. Jooheon pushes the one next to him to his friends.

They take Minhyuk and Changkyun to their locker room, giving them clean towels and clothes they keep in their lockers for them to shower. Hyunwoo and Kihyun get in the shower too. Hyunwoo takes Minhyuk to the shower stalls near the entrance of the room, maybe to give Changkyun and Kihyun some privacy when Kihyun leads the younger to the shower stalls at the end.

Kihyun opens the water, let it get warmer and he kinda does that to let it muffle their talks. He turns to Changkyun who just stands, looking at their clasped hands like hypnotized. Kihyun didn’t realize he was holding the younger’s hand but it’s okay. He feels good because his palm is warmer now. He is okay. Changkyun is okay.

Kihyun pulls Changkyun to himself without saying anything then, hugging him tight and sniffing his neck. Changkyun’s body stiffens when he starts to sob.

“I’m so glad that you are okay. I don’t know what I would do if… Just…” Kihyun says and sobs more, clutching to the younger more. “I’m just so fucking happy Kyun-ah.” He struggles to find the words so he just let his fingers dig in Changkyun’s skin, trying to bring him closer.

Changkyun just stands there, not knowing what to do but it takes only a few seconds for him to melt in Kihyun’s hold. “Hyung what are you doing?” He asks when he wraps his arms around the elder, one hand come up his hair to pet. “Shouldn’t I be the one crying? After all, I lived the life-and-death moment. I gotta be sensitive. You are stealing my light. Stop.” He says jokingly but he keeps holding Kihyun, steady, solid as a rock.

Kihyun shakes his head, pressing his lips to Changkyun’s neck, soothing. He feels like his body is a car and somebody cut his breaks and he is just loose. Kihyun clutches the younger, face buried in his neck, arms tightly wrapped around his middle until he feels he can breathe properly.

“For a moment I though something happened to you. Even the idea of it was enough to stop my breathing. You mean so much to me Changkyun. I just like you so much I don’t know what I would do… You can’t even…” Kihyun says but his heart can’t bear to finish that sentence because he feels an edgy, sharp stone is sitting on his throat. Changkyun looks at him eyes opened wide when Kihyun turns to kiss Changkyun on the mouth, very, very gently, like he might break. It’s chaste but a needy kiss and definitely says a lot of things. Like _I was so damn afraid_  or _I can't bear to see you get hurt._ Kihyun hopes that Changkyun understands how scared he was. He then kisses Changkyun’s cheek tenderly before he break their hug to wipe his tears. His hands find Changkyun’s hips in seconds though, thumbs rolling to massage the skin under the wet fabric. The shirt sticks on Changkyun’s body, wet white shirt makes his body visible, giving it a transparent look. There is purple shape that can be seen through the shirt.

“You…” Says Changkyun and let’s out a shaky breathe. He swallows, averting his gaze for a moment until Kihyun lift his eyes to meet with his soft ones.

The younger swallows again, lips pull up to shape a soft smile. His eyes are glossy and they shine. Totally the opposite of how Kihyun must have look now.

“Don’t be silly hyung, I promised you didn’t I? I won’t go anywhere.” Changkyun gives a toothless smile. His dimples are out in the open like they are little bowls waiting to be filled with candy. His expression is so sincere. Like that time he promised Kihyun.

“Besides it’s okay. I’m okay hyung. See?” Changkyun says, motioning his hand up and down to show himself. “Just a bit wet.” He smiles again, this time assuring but hisses when Kihyun accidentaly touches near his middle. “And a little bruised I guess. But you got it worse than me.” Changkyun says, softly touching Kihyun’s now probably purple chin.

Kihyun feels a sting when Changkyun’s fingertips ghost over his skin but doesn’t think about it because his mind is too busy about remembering the football players muttering something about punching the younger. His eyes go wide when he remembers that, hands stop wandering immediately.

“Does it hurt?” He asks. He goes from hurt and confused to angry in milliseconds. “I will kill those assholes.”

“Mehh it’s okay.” Changkyun laughs nervously, shaking his head. “I’ve had it worse before, you know I’m a tough kid.” Changkyun shrugs one shoulder casually, but he seems somehow smaller than usual, looking down at Kihyun’s hand so that his eyelashes cast a shadow. Even though they are stick together due to water still, they look so pretty.

Kihyun doesn’t know how to reply that. He narrows his eyes, and he scans Changkyun’s earnest expression. His heart breaks when he sees Changkyun doesn’t hold any bad feelings right now, interestingly, it's just... he just stands there. With Kihyun. And Kihyun’s eyes burn with new tears and heart roars with rage when he pulls Changkyun to himself for a hug.

“You won’t go through any of this again.” He says to the kid. With a very certain tone. Kihyun will make sure of it.

Changkyun nods, giggling he pats Kihyun’s back.“We are wasting water. Very bad, bad anti environmentalist behave of us. Come on.” He says and pulls Kihyun’s shirt for him to take it off. Kihyun throws his shirt away and works with his shorts but stops when he hears Changkyun say “Ouch. Hurts.”

Changkyun drops the hem of his own shirt with a pout but he holds it again to take it off.

“Wait.” Kihyun holds his hand and grabs the shirt, helping the younger take it off with less pain as possible.

The bruise is on Changkyun’s left side of his middle, the purple-red shape is very evident. It really doesn’t suit Changkyun’s pretty, milky skin. Like a black dot in a white paper, it really doesn’t belong there. Kihyun brushes his thumb on Changkyun’s hipbone, careful not to hurt him. He bites his bottom lip, trying to cage his anger because Changkyun is surprisingly calm about the matter and Kihyun doesn’t wish to make him snap.

Instead of saying how angry he is to Lee he just leans a little towards the younger’s torso. “You know I’m so proud of you. You stood up for your friend. You don’t know how to swim but still, you jumped in water to save him. How cool is that? You are so brave.” Kihyun says and kisses the spot above the bruise.

“Well yeah, almost drowned doing that.” Changkyun scoffs, mockingly.

“I would never let that happen.” Kihyun says, raising his head a little to press a wet kiss on Changkyun’s left collarbone. His gaze meet with Changkyun’s and Changkyun looks dazed, lips pink, blinking like he's been drugged. Kihyun licks his own lips, and watches the way Changkyun’s eyes flicker down.

“I guess we gotta start our swimming lessons a lot sooner than I thought.” Changkyun says with a shakey breathe and takes a step back in to shower. “And we should hurry up now too, because your friends and my friends are probably waiting outside for us. We can’t linger.”

Kihyun frowns but obligates, steals a peck from the younger and stands under the spray to let it wash off the chlorine off of his skin. He pulls Changkyun with him and gets some shampoo, his own shampoo, in his hand and washes Changkyun with it. Changkyun objects, saying he can do it but Kihyun doesn’t listen him as he rinse the younger’s hair. He likes it when Changkyun smells like himself, mint and wood, along with his own floral scent. He quickly finishes washing them both because Changkyun is right, he knows they can’t play around. He wraps the younger with his towel and offers Changkyun to help him get dressed but Changkyun says he can go ahead, he’ll be fine.

Kihyun stays and helps.

When they are finished, probably in twenty minutes, they go out to meet with others who are in the room, indeed waiting for them like Changkyun predicted. It would be really good if some of them leave but well, all of them sits on the benches. Hoseok gets up to hug Changkyun with a relieved face. Kihyun throws a look at Hyungwon and Yoongi with questioning eyes. Hyungwon just shrugs and Yoongi shakes his head. Hoseok doesn’t say anything to Kihyun, doesn’t cast a glance on him too. He takes Changkyun to his bench in front of his locker. Kihyun does go to sit next Hyungwon but he knows Hoseok is taking glances to himself when he silently talks with Changkyun. Changkyun nods, eyes lifting but not matching Kihyun’s or let him know he knows he looks at him. They wait like that, other than small breathing sounds, nobody says anything. Nobody talks about what happened, nobody even let’s out any sound but of course Kihyun feels every single one of his team members are itching to say something. A total silence falls on the room until they hear a crack from the door. Minhyuk in Hyungwon’s baggy clothes, tails Hyunwoo who ruffles his hair.

Minhyuk fiddles with his hands, looks a lot different because he is always too smug and confident and chatty. Now he just bites his cheek and stands awkwardly. Hoseok gets up again, hugging his friend. They talk something but in whispers, so the others can’t hear them. Hoseok pats Minhyuk’s back when they break the hug and Minhyuk gives him an assuring smile.

“We are glad that you guys are okay.” Hyungwon says from the locker he’s been leaning. His voice is soft, sincere. Minhyuk smiles a little at him, nodding before he take glances to everyone in the room.

“Thank you for coming. I just—I don’t know what would have happened if you guys didn’t show up. Changkyun might---“ Minhyuk bites his lips, eyes linger on the younger who shake his head like it was nothing.

It was everything. But Kihyun will talk about this matter with him later.

Hoseok moves his hands up and down on Minhyuk’s back to comfort him when he says, “Thank you.” With a grateful but wary expression.

“Anyone would have done the same.” Jooheon replies, showing his ultimate weapons that no one can resist, his dimples. He probably does smile like that to make Minhyuk feel safe, feel better because he is among friends and it works because Minhyuk’s smiles, a little, back at him.

“Thank you.” Minhyuk says again, eyes still glossy.

“It’d be best if we just go. We’ll talk about this later.” Hoseok says and Minhyuk nods.

Hoseok goes next to Changkyun who said nothing since they come to the room and leads him to the door. Kihyun wants to go with them but a hand on his wrist stops him.

He looks at Minhyuk who has an unreadable expression on his face. His red, puffy eyes are somehow twisted with a cold look. “You and I…” He says with an equally cold tone. “…should talk, Yoo Kihyun.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what do you think?  
> Was it the kind of angst you anticipated of lmao  
> I'm just trying to go with a real perspective here so I hope you like that  
> I hope you had fun!  
> Tell me if you did or didn't:)))


	8. 0 + 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my dear changkinators!!!  
> How are you, doing well I hope?  
> I'm dying with the amount of money I'm about to spend for the albums... but well...  
> Anyway I hope you are good.  
> Thanks for the comments I love them^^
> 
> I give you this 8k chapter. I'm surprised how long I'm writing I hope I'm not boring you^^  
> I know I gotta be more careful with grammar I'm gonna do checks later!!  
> Anyway don't let me hold you, please enjoy^^  
> And at the end tell me what you think please:)  
> Have fun~~~
> 
>  
> 
> Aaaand if you have twitter, mathe use #EasyPrey to help me find you^^

Kihyun stops on his tracks, letting Hoseok get lost through the corridor with Changkyun before his eyes focus on Minhyuk’s icy ones. Minhyuk let’s his hand go after squezing a little, it hurts but Kihyun doesn’t say anything because he feels like Minhyuk is holding him pinned in his place with his cold stare. Kihyun doesn’t know what’s going on but the expression Minhyuk has, scares him. Minhyuk as far as Kihyun knows, always looks so careless so cheery and now he looks so serious, so stern. Almost feels like the person who thanked them minutes ago and the person who throws daggers with his eyes are two different person. Kihyun eyes Minhyuk and gets back inside the room when Minhyuk doesn’t do anything like leaving or gesturing to speak with him alone. He also gazes to his members and see the surprised look they have. It’s obvious that they feel… disturbed. Kihyun can see they are stuck between leaving or staying but they don’t move. Maybe because Minhyuk scared them too. Or maybe because he stands between them and the door.

“What do you wanna talk? What is it about?” Kihyun asks, going to his locker to grab a towel to dry his hair. He can go see Changkyun after they are done talking.

Minhyuk follows him, putting his hands to his hips before he reply “You all being complete asses.” and lifts an eyebrow.

Kihyun’s hand stops on the locker. His eyebrows pulled together with confusion. What can Minhyuk possibly be talking about? They just pulled him out of water didn't they? How can they be complete asses?

“What?” Hyungwon vocalizes Kihyun’s thoughts with a confused tone before Kihyun can say anything.

Minhyuk let’s out a snort, shaking his hand before turn around the room. “You guys, all of you know the bet right?” Minhyuk asks, flamey brown eyes looking to the team players one by one. He searches the mimics on their faces to see how they will react but to be honest, his attidute tells that he doesn’t wait for an answer. He is more like a mother who knows her kid did break that precious vase and expect them to own their fault.

The room falls silent.

Nobody says anything.

It’s really bothersome.

But to care, Kihyun is too busy going deaf with the sound of his heart beating at his ears when his hand slides from the locker, the towel slip out of his grasp because suddenly he feels his hands and feet go free. Not listening any command his brain giving.

“What are you talking about?” Hyungwon becomes the voice again. He swallows hardly, eyes on Minhyuk but every single person in the room know it’s for vain. Trying to reject is for vain.

Minhyuk shakes his head to Hyungwon, in disappointment, and Hyungwon averts his eyes as a guilt sit on his face because he knows, Kihyun knows he knows. “You are very well aware of the matter that I’m talking about but sure. I’ll remind you. Remember you guys had a stupid bet?” He asks and points Kihyun. “That little stupid bet you all made for _this asshole_ to sleep with my best friend. Does it ring a bell now?”

Kihyun feels his blood runs cold in his veins when Minhyuk spills the words. His face starts to paint red but not with blush. With fear. _Shame._

None of the boys say anything and Kihyun feels too fucked up to say anything until Yoongi breaks the silence.

“How do you know?” Yoongi asks, his face pales a shade. Kihyun thinks they could have denied but it wouldn’t work because Minhyuk’s reply throw that idea completely into the trash.

“I didn’t know all of it until yesterday, until Changkyun started crying like he never did before because he did drink three times more than he normally does. What can I say? Miracles of alcohol.” Minhyuk replies, face red with anger.

Kihyun’s heart stops for a second and starts to beat in an unmeasurable pace. His hands tremble, eyes start to burn and he leans back to his locker to hold himself up, to not slump down.

Changkyun knows?

Minhyuk doesn’t let him even think when he starts, “You know all of you are cocky and you walk around like you own this place. You mock with people, own a table at cafeteria for you only, even the teachers favor you because you are representing the school. You guys are golden kids, specially now that you will play finals at nationals but I have never thought you were this evil. I mean I was thinking all of you were idiots and jerks but I never even thought that you could do something so bad. I had a small sense of respect to you because of your starlight but I know who you really are now. You are disgusting, all of you.” Minhyuk says, eyes roaming on every member. His expression spreads disappointment and disgust. Jin and Cory ducks their head without saying anything. Hyungwon opens his mouth to say something but he shuts up, biting his bottom lip. Yoongi let’s out a breath. Hyunwoo and Jooheon throw a look at each other like they wanna run away.

But when Minhyuk turns his eyes to Kihyun, irises blazing with flames, and says, “But Yoo Kihyun you are… You are worse. You are worse than all of them.” Kihyun just wants to vanish. He wishes for earth to crack open, the ground under him torn in two and swallow him if it’s possible, get him somewhere else other than this four walls. Four suffocating walls, closing on him every passing second.

“It wasn’t like that—“ Yoongi starts but Minhyuk doesn’t listen, eyes directly at Kihyun with an angry smirk.

“You don’t even open your precious mouth to say you are sorry. Fuck you!” Minhyuk says and punches Kihyun. Kihyun sees him raising his hand and he could stop him if he wanted but to be honest he is too forgone to care. Because he knows he deserved it. He moves his chin a little and his cheek hurts, stings. Minhyuk must have hit the bruise Lee placed on his face earlier. Kihyun doesn’t do anything even when Minhyuk grabs Kihyun’s collars and shakes him, rough.

Jooheon and Hyunwoo gasp, move from their place to help him but he holds his hand up with a head shake.

He deserved it.

Minhyuk shakes him again, his face is twisted with hate. “Did you have fun? Tell me. Was it fun for you? Did it worth it? Did you run and tell your friends how funny Changkyun looked when he melted in your arms? Later did you point at and laugh at him whenever you see the kid? Did it boost your popularity in the group? Your charm, your charisma, your effect, your control over the Changkyun. Did they help you get more coins? Did your coolness increase? Did you get a trophy? Tell me, I’m all ears.”

Minhyuk cocks an eyebrow like he is so damn interested with what Kihyun will say. Kihyun however feels to fucked up, unable to say anything before his eyes shot upwards to the ceiling and he tries to collect his thoughts.

“It’s not. I—I didn’t—Do it because of – that-“ Kihyun starts but stutters for some reason. He can’t talk properly because he feels something is stopping him from saying anything. Words clog his throat. Like there is a hand wrapped around his neck, holding tighter and tighter, choking him when he tries to speak. It feels a lot like drowning.

 “Why did you do it then?” Minhyuk asks, narrowing his eyes.

“Because I like him.” Kihyun says, words slipping out rusty.

“Oh really?” Minhyuk laughs but it’s fake, so fake. And it dies, his fake smile replaced by a cold, thin line in a moment. He let’s Kihyun go and takes a few step back. “Why did you threat him then? Saying if he tells anything about your little ‘affair’ to anyone, you will tell people and humiliate him? Because you like him? What kind of a reason is this?”

Kihyun opens his mouth to object, to say he didn’t do such a thing but his brain halts, flashing memories of his talks with Changkyun and he remembers what he said that time he cornered the younger in the library. He was thinking that sleeping with Changkyun as something physical back then, he was going to search the kid whenever he want to. ‘Let some steam off’ was the idea he was having when he started this. Kihyun didn’t guess he could be this attached and involved. He didn’t even give a chance of the idea ‘liking a boy’ let alone falling for one. Because he didn’t know he could love someone regardless of their gender and accept it because that wasn’t what his family taught him. That path was wrong, sinful and shouldn’t be walked on no matter the cost. That’s why he was afraid if someone would find out their relation, just physical or not, his reputation would be ruined. That’s why he did say those things to Changkyun. He knew the kid wouldn’t tell anyone about them even if Kihyun would just asked but still he did say that.

Kihyun bites his bottom lip, lowers his gaze before he looks up to meet with Minhyuk’s.

“Because I was embarrassed. I didn’t think I’d like him this much and it was such an asshole thing for me to do. But I don’t think like that now. I don’t care now. About who learns or not.”

“It doesn’t matter now Kihyun, don’t you understand that? It doesn’t matter that you’ve come to terms with who you are or who you like. It was your problem, not Changkyun’s. You were the one who should have figure himself out, not him. I’m happy for you but that doesn’t change the facts. What’s done is done. You broke his heart.” Minhyuk says hands gripping Kihyun’s shoulders and lowers his eyes to look at him. Kihyun feels the fingers dig on his shoulders.

“I will make up for it. I’m sorry, he will see that. He will forgive me.” Kihyun says, head shaking, not wanting to accept the fact that he really did hurt Changkyun. Minhyuk shakes his head slowly.

“That’s the problem you see? He already forgave you. He doesn’t care. I have no idea why but Changkyun is just too madly in love with you, enough for him to not care if you hurt him or not. To forgive you whatever you do. He just loves you. Even yesterday, after all that crying and whining he said he gotta call you, God knows why. Don’t you see that this can’t go on? You’ll just keep hurting him. Everytime he looks at you he will remember you played with him but he won’t leave your side. I can’t allow that.”

“What do you mean?” Kihyun asks, heart dropping to his feet with fear.

“I noticed something was going on you know. He was way head in the air, more than usual for the past couple of months. I don’t know if it was a coincidence or fate but I learned you two were having a thing because I saw one of your messages a few weeks ago. I was playing a game on his phone and your message popped out. I didn't get it first, why would you be talking with him because you never even say hi to kid on a normal day but he freaked out and tried to grab the phone from me. It was weird because something was going on. He tells me everything you know? But I had no idea you two were talking so I persuaded, pushed him and he spilled the tea. When I talked with him, he made me swear not to tell anyone. He didn’t tell much but I was guessing some stuff and I played along with him because he was happy. Even though knowing the fact that you just call him when you wanted to fuck someone.” Minhyuk looks away and says “I should have stepped in. I should have said something. Maybe then he wouldn’t be in this situation right now.” Like he is talking to himself rather than Kihyun. He loosens his grip on Kihyun’s shoulders and takes a step back, eyes fixed on Kihyun again. “But I won’t just let you break his heart or his pride anymore. I won’t let you do that Kihyun.”

“What are you saying?” Kihyun asks, confused.

“You will stop seeing Changkyun. You won’t even glance at him, do you understand me?”

Kihyun stares at Minhyuk, trying to understand what he means. He looks at his friends but they just stare back, shocked, unable tot say anything. By now the conversation just flows between the two of them, the other members don’t know what to do except staying silent with sorry eyes.

Kihyun collects his thoughts to defend himself. “Look I understand you want to protect him. You are his friend and I was a total jerk in this scenario but I’m not how I was before. I love him now Minhyuk, you can’t ask me to stop seeing him.” Kihyun replies, surprised by Minhyuk’s words.

“Of course you do. Now that you have everything in your life, of course you do love him. I mean who wouldn’t want a puppy following them around with heart eyes all the time?” Minhyuk snorts but he is angry.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Kihyun says, eyebrows pulled together.

“Be honest Kihyun. Just be honest to yourself and tell me, if you didn’t sleep with Changkyun would you still feel something for him? Would you take a moment to glance at him? Would you spare one millisecond to think about him?” Minhyuk asks and waits shaking his head. “I don’t think so. You do love him now because you know you have an all time fan. Because you are someone like this Kihyun. You like to be pampered, you like hearing compliments, you like people looking at you like you own the world.”

“I care about him.” Kihyun rejects but Minhyuk laughs.

“Don’t say you care about him Kihyun. Don’t give me that bullshit.” He points himself on the chest. ”I care about him. He is my friend. He is nothing to you! You don’t get to say you care about him because whatever right you think your dick gives you! It was me who did share his sandwiches and drinks with him when he gave his to you, every damn time because he could get to be near you. Just for three fucking seconds. Did you ever say thank you? You didn’t. Because you didn’t care. So don’t come and talk to me like you do.”

Kihyun stares at him in disbelief, words falling down on him like boiling water. “I can make up all of this to him.” He says because he doesn’t know what else to say.

“Nope.” Minhyuk says with a shake. “You lost your chance.”

Tears spring up behind Kihyun’s eyes and hurt his throat. “You can’t prevent me from seeing him. I don’t care what you do or say. I will make things right.”

“And what do you expect me to do in the mean time, huh? Cross my arms and watch you be with him, knowing you are the one who upset him? No Kihyun, you lost your damn chance.” Minhyuk repeats and adds, “That’s why no matter how much I hate doing this, I’m going to threaten you.” He drops his arms to his side, eyes squint with mock. “But I guess it’s okay with you. You are used to it after all.” He says, taking a step towards to Kihyun. “Did you know the american football team is gonna play at nationals in three weeks like your basketball team? I doubt you know that because you only care about yourself and your precious teammates but let me tell you, it’s a big thing for the school and schoolboard. But I’m not sure if their left wing player, Lee will be able to attend the games because you beat the shit out of him. If you don’t stop seeing Changkyun, I will tell the principle about the fight today. I will tell how you jumped on Lee. I wonder what will our teachers say to that.”

Kihyun’s eyes open with shock, he can’t form words.

“And not just you, I will tell about your team members too because this is not only your fault. It’s also their’s for staying silent, for mocking with my friend behind his back. I will name everyone who fought and watched today. And do you know what will happen once they confirm this? Once they learn you guys were involved in a fight? You will all kicked out of the team. The team you all worked so hard to be in. The team that is about to play their final game in nationals this Saturday, for the first time in the school history. The team that can be legends and talked about for years. I will end it Kihyun I swear. I will end all your basketball careers.”

“No.” Jooheon yelps with fear, hands clutching Hyunwoo who stood next to him and even the stoic elder’s face twists with shock.

“You can’t do that. You can’t be that mean.” Hyungwon says, eyes open with surprise. He takes a step towards Minhyuk, maybe to calm him down but stops when he sees the determined look in the white haired eyes and squirm back.

“ _Try me._ ” Minhyuk dares, head snapping towards the taller. “You were mean enough to play with my friend. Laugh at him. Act like he is a toy. Try me and see if I can be this mean.”

Minhyuk’s eyes fall on Kihyun again who bites inside his cheek. Kihyun’s eyes train on his friends, seeing how shocked and afraid they all look. All eyes on him. All their hopes. He feel something break inside of him when he realizes all of their future is between his two lips. This team is their everything. All of them worked so hard to be in it. Day and night, in cold and in warm weather. Sometimes they came with the sunrise and left long after sunset. Giving their times, bodies, sweats, efforts. And it’s not just them who are in this team but also their parents and families. Jooheon’s grandmother always hugs each member after their every game, wether they win or lose saying they played so well and she is so proud of them. Hyungwon’s family pays their travelling costs if they can’t get enough money from the school. Hyunwoo’s mom did sew their first Jerseys. Yoongi’s parents never miss a game and Jin’s dad always comes with the banner he made for their first game “Fail or not, you already won this!!”

Kihyun can’t take away this from them, he can’t be the reason they are not playing anymore. But then again Changkyun is just everything Kihyun ever wanted. The only person who loves him without asking anything back. The only person Kihyun knows he can rely on. The only person who accepts him even though Kihyun tear his heart out and crush it in front of his eyes.

He did that though didn't he? When he first layed hands on Changkyun, he knew he was going to break the kid's heart soon or later. But he didn't know he would rip apart his own too.

Kihyun drops his stare to the ground. Because he already hurt Changkyun enough. No matter how much he wants to be with him, he can’t do this to him anymore. That’s why his heart breaks in billions of pieces when he says “Don’t. Don’t do that. They did nothing. It was all because of me. I will do what it takes. I will stop seeing him.” With a defeated voice.

“You better.” Minhyuk says before he takes a glance around him once more. “You know, you should be glad that Hoseok hyung has no idea or he would paint the other side of your chin to rainbow.”

Minhyuk turns on his tracks and leaves the locker room, leaving the seven players inside. They look each other without saying anything, the feelings of the thing that happened is too fresh to comment on it. Jooheon slumps down on the bench with trembling lips, Hyunwoo leans back arms crossed on his chest. Hyungwon comes next to Kihyun and places his hand on his shoulder as Yoongi reaches out to hold Kihyun when Kihyun starts to shake but Kihyun shoves their hands away with an angry look.

“It’s all because of your stupid bet. You couldn’t stop teasing me could you?” He yells, chin clenched with anger but he knows it’s not like that, he is blaming his friends for nothing and he knows Yoongi know it because he has a sad, soft look in his eyes. Understanding. Sorry. Regretful.

Kihyun chews inside his cheeks in anger and pushes Hyungwon and Yoongi away from him to grab his bag. He storms out the room, not reply any of them but he doesn’t leave before fixing his friends a look with “Don’t come follow me.”

He runs back to his house and throws his bag to the ground when he is inside. He kicks the bag repeatedly and when it’s not enough he grabs a pillow and hits it to the corner of the sofa. To the coffee table. Again and again but somehow he can’t get simmer his anger down. He throws it away and falls on the carpet. He grabs another pillow and screams into the fabric as he beats it with his fists. He curses and sobs, really hard until he can’t cry anymore.

 

*******

 

The sky turns purple to dark blue, sun goes down sometime ago but still Kihyun hides his face in his pillow, not moving a single muscle. Not even when there is someone on his door, very persistently knocks the wood. The sound on the door gets louder and bangs inside his head when Kihyun doesn’t even bother to look up but the person is really persistent and it’s clear they want to come in. His team members must have come to check on him after he left like that, they didn’t stop buzzing his phone but honestly he has no will to see anyone right now. He feels so sad, so angry and so broken beyond he can explain. So he just lies there, expecting the person go away. The knocking stops after a moment and Kihyun let’s out a huff in relief.

“Hyung are you gonna open the door or should I go around the house and try to jump from the fences and come face with a life-death situation while I’m doing that? No matter how flexible I’m, twice near-death experience is too much for one day even—“

Kihyun throws the pillow away, runs to the door and opens it in a heart beat. He doesn’t think how he looks, very ugly probably but that doesn’t matter. Not when Changkyun looks surprised for a moment, hands in his black denim’s pockets and purple hoodie over his head. Kihyun blinks a few times. He can’t grasp the fact that Changkyun stands in front of him. Not even when Changkyun let’s himself in, closing the door behind himself.

“What are you doing here?” Kihyun asks, voice a little raspy due to all that screaming when he grips some sense. He watches Changkyun take out his shoes and drop his bag next to his beated one.

Changkyun’s eyes roam on the sofa, pillows and feathers on the floor then Kihyun’s face before he shrugs. “I managed to sneak out like a princess when Minhyuk hyung was in toilet and I gotta say I'm a bit proud for being able to get out from window. All those ninja movies I watched, payed off after all."

He rolls his eyes and continues when he sees the confusion on Kihyun's face. "Because I wanted to check how is that bruise of yours looking hyung, if it hurts and if you treated it. It happened because of me you know, so it's on me.” He leans forward to take a better look at Kihyun’s face. “It looks pretty purple so I’m guessing you didn’t even put ice on it. Come on.” He says and grabs Kihyun’s hand, pulling him towards the kitchen. Kihyun sniffles, his brain is too frozen to say anything when Changkyun sits him down and grabs an icepack from the freezer to put it on his cheek. Kihyun doesn’t jerk with the coldness, instead his eyes stay on Changkyun’s feautures when the younger sits next to him. His blonde hair, his chapped pink lips, his acne scarred but pretty, soft cheeks, his slightly red, glossy eyes.

Red eyes.

Changkyun shuffles on his chair, pressing the ice pack to a different part of the bruise. “I talked with Minhyuk hyung too by the way. Didn’t go well. Scorpios are too stubborn.” Changkyun murmurs, not looking at Kihyun directly but he knows Kihyun is looking at him.

Kihyun stops breathing then, contemplating about what could they possibly talked about but he knows. Of course he knows.

Red eyes.

Because of his talk with Minhyuk.

So he cried too.

Because he knows that Kihyun gave up on him.

Kihyun’s stomach turns upside down and if it’s possible, it burns inside.

“You did?” Kihyun clears his throat, heart breaking to millions more pieces like it’s not shattered already.

“Yes. He said I'm too in deep to think clearly. He told me that I act like a whining child.” Changkyun replies, still keeping his eyes on the ice pack. “I want you to know that I understand you hyung. Minhyuk hyung is very protective of me. Maybe it's because we are together since I was a baby I don't know. Still I’m sorry on behalf of him, the thing he asked… " He stops, biting his lip with a shake. "He cornered you. It’s not just you who on the line but your teammates too. I understand I totally do. I would have done the same. I don't blame you okay? So please don’t blame yourself too.” Changkyun says with a nod and adds. “Besides there is nothing to blame.”

Kihyun feels his eyes get heavy with new tears and they stroll down, hot. He swipes them away with his sleeves not caring if Changkyun sees them or not.

Changkyun casts his eyes down for a moment before all of a sudden asking, “Wanna go somewhere now?” and tilting his head curiously.

“Now?” Kihyun sniffs, confused by the sudden change of the mood.

Changkyun drops the ice-pack on his lap and squeezes it. “Think of it as a sorry because I don’t think I can come this Sunday.” He says with an apologetic face and Kihyun remembers that he told Changkyun he will take the younger to somewhere after the game. He was planning to ask Changkyun out that day with all kind of cute and sweet shits he didn't do until now. And now he doesn't have that luxury.

Kihyun blinks back his tears and swallows his sorrys as he nods. “Sure.” He replies. “Where do you wanna go?”

Changkyun smiles a bit, sad, and gets up, throwing ice-pack on the counter before he turns to Kihyun. “I know a place and they make amazing ice-creams. Think like this, you order a fig flavoured ice-cream and you eat it and it’s like you really eat the fig, not the ice cream.” He says too enthuistiactaly. He checks his phone. “It should be open now.”

“Okay.” Kihyun says, “I’ll just grab my wallet.” and runs to the bathroom. He grabs the sink and let’s out a few breaths to calm himself down, to stop his tears. He washes his face and looks up, seeing his eyes all puffy and red. His cheeks are puff too. He looks awful but there is nothing he can do about it so he wipes his face with the green towel and let’s in and out a few breaths more.

He finds Changkyun tidying the living room, pillows are already on their places. He turns to Kihyun with a smile and grabs Kihyun’s hand when he doesn’t do anything to pull him next the door. They grab their bags and wear their shoes without saying anything.

The ice-cream place is not that far but they walk slowly, hands brushing to each other. Kihyun’s hand twich to hold the younger’s soft one but he doesn’t dare. It’s like if he holds he can’t let go again. He wants to do it, let his fingers find Changkyun’s easily but he remembers the promise he made for Changkyun, for himself and for his team mates. So he just let his hand swing between them and make his spine tingle every time it touch with Changkyun’s.

When they come to the shop Changkyun insists on paying because he invited Kihyun so he should pay but Kihyun doesn’t let him, saying he can buy next time out of habit. He fists his hands when Changkyun look away when he say next time and digs his nails in his palm to not cry. There won’t be a next time.

Changkyun gets a scoop of fig flavored and chestnut flavored ice cream. He says it’s his favorite and he wanted to eat this since the beginning of the summer but he couldn’t get a chance because the shop’s opening hours are clashing with his part time work schedule. Kihyun gets mint-chocolate chips and lemon by Changkyun’s suggest. Kihyun pays and they walk to a park near. Since it’s night time, there is no kid no parents in the park. Just two of them and cold breeze.

They sit close, talk about daily things, upcoming break after the game and what they will do for two weeks. Changkyun’s project for the science fair and Kihyun’s new tactic for the final. Still Kihyun doesn’t talk much, Changkyun speaks mostly but they both know they avoid the things they should really talk. About what happened today.

It’s a lot dark when they fall into a silence. The streetlights doesn’t work for some reason and maybe that’s better when Kihyun feels so ashamed. Hurt. In pain. In love. Sorry. Glad.

“Thank you for saving me today hyung.” Changkyun breaks the silence with a soft voice, looking at the cone in his hand.

“Anything for my boy.” Kihyun replies in whisper without a hesitance and Changkyun's lips form a smile.

He holds his head up, looking at the sky. "Do you know Altair and Vega, hyung?"

Kihyun shakes his head, not tearing his eyes from Changkyun's skin, bright under moon and starlight.

"It's an old Chinese story. Altair was a young shephard and Vega was the princess of the heavenly skies. Altair saw her one day, falling in love and chased her eventually made her fall in love with him. Being with Altair was tough because he was mortal and Vega was coming from the royal family of stars. Still they were happy for awhile until Vega's father learned about them and eventually broke them apart, dragging Vega to home, in skies."

Kihyun's lips tremble. He swallows, hoping the sharp rock sitting on his throat go down. He clears it when swallowing doesn't work and asks, silently "Vega... Did she stop loving Altair?"

Changkyun let's out a breathe. He drops his eyes to the ground then rest them on Kihyun. A smile linger on his lips and it breaks something inside of Kihyun. "No... he didn't. And I don't think he ever will."

Kihyun nods, biting his lips. He knows _he won't._

Changkyun pulls out his phone, it’s ringing but he throws it in his pocket and gets up.

“Should we go back?” Changkyun asks, hand reaching out for Kihyun to hold and Kihyun stares at it for a moment. “It’s late.” Changkyun adds and Kihyun nods, lets himself hold Changkyun’s hand. Just this once.

They walk to home, Kihyun’s house, hand in hand and when they arrive Changkyun gets inside with Kihyun. He pulls Kihyun to upstairs before Kihyun can protest.

“Changkyun…” Kihyun starts but Changkyun cuts him off, pressing his lips on Kihyun’s when they are inside, secure in his bedroom. Changkyun slides Kihyun’s jacket off from his shoulders and clutches on Kihyun’s shirt. He just kisses the corner of Kihyun’s lips and says, “Let me have this hyung.” With a pleading voice. “Just this once.”

It’s like an ask. A memory to keep. To hide deep in the heart and mind. A piece to hold.

Kihyun stops. His mind stops working for a moment and then he hums, complying with Changkyun’s wish and kiss along his jaw like he's trying to comfort him. Or himself.

He will let Changkyun have this, just this once like he said, as an apology even if it’s nothing, it’s everything he can do now. Letting his lips brush over Changkyun’s sweet skin when Changkyun tilts his neck, exposing his neck and Kihyun knots his fingers together behind the small of Changkyun' back. Kihyun slides his tongue on his throat, caressing his back softly. Changkyun’s fingers clench on his hair and pull him into a scorching kiss. Kihyun feels dizzy with the lips dancing with his own and his hands reach to pull Changkyun’s sweatshirt up out of habit. When he hears the hiss Changkyun let’s out in the kiss, he stops remembering the sore spot on his torso. He bites his lips and smothers the anger that jumps inside him because he doesn’t have the luxury to think about another thing right now, except Changkyun. He shoves that the rage at the back of his head to let it surface another time before he silently helps the younger take the sweatshirt off and he takes his shirt off.

He catches the younger’s lips again and kisses Changkyun hard, claiming, tongue delving deep and lips on the verge of bruising. His hands work on the younger’s zipper and pulls his denim down with his boxer. He let’s Changkyun push his own clothes and gets out of them before he lays Changkyun on his bed.

Kihyun groans when the hot length of his cock slides next to Changkyun' own. Changkyun arches up, cradles Kihyun's hips with his thighs. He cages Kihyun there while Kihyun kiss him.

This time it's slower, though no less thorough; Kihyun doesn’t fight for domination. He lets Changkyun in easily, savouring the way Changkyun's exploring his mouth, tongue wandering in it. Kihyun's body settles over Changkyun’s, the friction of their bare skin building the heat between them more. Changkyun’s right hand makes its way to Kihyun's hair, while the other slips over Kihyun's shoulder and scratches at the skin between his shoulder-blades down until his tailbone. Changkyun doesn't seem to be in any hurry and Kihyun wants him to live this as he wish. Changkyun’s hands caress Kihyun's neck, shoulders, arms, stomach. They kiss, and kiss, and kiss, until Kihyun's jaw is aching from it, his lips stinging. He drinks in Changkyun's taste, breathes in breath from Changkyun's mouth, and quietly, secretly, aches.

Not really pulling his mouth away, he maneuvers Changkyun a little higher and with that Kihyun rolls his body down, down, down against Changkyun, panting into his mouth. He lets their cocks brush each other, rubbing his skin. It’s a good, slow rhythm, steady but dirty. His teeth stay across Changkyun’s lip, Changkyun’s nails up his back, the soft friction buzz enveloping his dick.

Kihyun’s hand comes between them to jerk them off together. He wraps his fingers to both of their heavy cocks as much as he can, smearing their precomes over the skin and pumps them slowly.

“Hyung.” Changkyun moans with the touch but Kihyun drinks his voice from his mouth.

“ _Baby._ ” He says, sucking Changkyun’s bottom lip as he moves on him until Changkyun chocks, words stuck in his throat as he stiffens and comes in Kihyun’s hand in hot, sticky mess and Kihyun comes too, hot spreading white on Changkyun’s thighs.

“Hyung.” Changkyun growls again a few seconds later, breathing heavily with haze. Kihyun hums with pleasure, nibbling with the skin underside of Changkyun’s jaw.

“Whatever you want.” Kihyun replies him. “Whatever you want Changkyun.”

Changkyun reaches down, left hand caressing Kihyun’s hipbone and says “I want you hyung.” As he pants against Kihyun’s skin. He presses in against Kihyun, moving to his hip. Kihyun looks at Changkyun, there’s this shiver that runs through him at the steady dark of his eyes. He places a kiss on Changkyun’s forehead as he reaches for the lube. He blindly opens the cap and slicks his already cum smeared fingers with the matter, letting it spill some on Changkyun. He doesn’t stop peppering kisses all over Changkyun’s face when he moves his middle finger through the lube and semen coating Changkyun’s thighs, near his balls. Down, then, over his taint to rub at his hole Kihyun slips his finger in Changkyun slowly to work him open. Changkyun spreads out as much as he can, and shivers a little, and Kihyun is biting the muscle of his left collarbone with blunt teeth, breath flaring hotly against the skin. Changkyun makes soft noises in his throat, pressing down to Kihyun’s hand so Kihyun can move better. They have done this before. They know how it goes so Changkyun doesn’t feel shy anymore when he grunts out a breath and spreads his legs a little more for Kihyun to add another finger, but again no matter how many times they did this Kihyun still watches his face, watch for his reactions to catch if something goes wrong. But he knows, Changkyun knows, it doesn't hurt exactly, it's just different, intimate. Intimate in a way only they know. And it’s not about what happens, it's more what's going to happen, what Changkyun wants, what he's going to do. Because that’s the only thing Kihyun can do now.

Changkyun swallows thickly and stretches a hand down and digs his nails into Kihyun’s shoulder.

"You good?" Kihyun asks roughly as he moves his fingers in a steady rhythm.

"So good," Changkyun manages to say brokenly, still a little wrecked. "Can’t even define it."

Kihyun gets down, kisses the bare curve of Changkyun's hip, scrapes his teeth under the purple bruise on his stomach when he adds the third finger. He continues to press kisses on the younger’s chest, licking and sucking the skin. When Changkyun starts to beg he stops, pulling his fingers out to replace them by his dick. He slides in one, swift motion with curses and compliments, words filled with promises and empty hopes.

Kihyun growls, harsh in his throat, because he wants to just fuck really deep into him but stops, caging his emotions because everything feels too much already. He shifts his body into the push to try and make it easier before he starts to move slowly, letting Changkyun adjust his length until he taps on his shoulder for Kihyun to move faster, and he does. They find a rhythm soon enough, that blissful, floating feeling wraps them. Kihyun has a vague feeling that his arms and legs are flailing everywhere, but it's hard to spare the attention when his entire brain is being sucked out through his dick. All he can think about is the amazing heat and wetness and suction and so much heat around him.

Still with the last piece of his mind he folds over Changkyun’s body, fingers biting into his hip. Until he's curled tight over him, all the way inside him Changkyun comes with a gasping noise that sounds like a sob. His whole body clenches, and Kihyun makes a low noise in his throat, bites, hard but brief, at his shoulder, before going still, letting him ride it out. Until Changkyun is shivery and loose, listening to his heart pound and whimpering through the comedown. Kihyun starts moving again, his hands slide up Changkyun's back, and grip around his shoulders. Changkyun just relaxes into it, and lets Kihyun take what he needs, body bending until he's up on his forearms, ass raised. Kihyun says fuck, over and over, rhythm broken into something jagged and greedy. It's good, and it hurts a little Kihyun knows that the way Changkyun is clawing at the sheets, and turning his face against the pillows, skin burning with heat.

“ _Kihyun._ ”

Kihyun shudders to a stop, stream of words swallowed in his throat when he comes. He pants his way through it, claws his nails against Changkyun’s skin, and then Kihyun just curls over Changkyun's body like he doesn't want to stop, drags his teeth over the bowed curve of his neck, in a way that feels so intimate that he shudders.

"Oh my God," Changkyun says thickly and Kihyun can’t find any other word to describe it. He feels sweaty and achy and so, so good but still he feels like he can’t stop.

Kihyun pulls out but grips Changkyuns wrists, holding them pinned next to his head and sucks the skin on Changkyun’s soft chest, stomach, neck, biceps. He knows Changkyun is just as boneless as he is but he continues to attack his throat and collar bones, sucking bright marks into the skin and biting all over him. Even when he's done with one and moves to the next because he wants Changkyun to feel them throb even after days later.

Even after days later.

When he gets some sense after a while, when the fog dissolves and his mind is cleared, relatively, he stops biting, stops acting like a savage animal. He pants quietly, the aggressive, predatory aura he has fades away from his face. He eases back, fingers sliding free of Changkyun's wrists when he lifts his eyes to look at the younger who looks back at him with glossy, stars-hidden eyes. With glimmer in his brown orbits. With love printed in his brown orbits. Kihyun always thought Changkyun has the whole galaxy inside those brown orbits but the way Changkyun looks at him feels like he sees the universe in Kihyun’s eyes. So adoring. So fragile. So gentle. So delicate. So stern. So soft. So hard. So lovingly.

So lovingly.

“Hyung.” Changkyun says and suddenly it dawns on him. The thing he was trying not to think. The reality he was trying to escape from. The fact that he has to let Changkyun go. The fact that he will not see this eyes anymore. He will not touch this soft skin like whenever he wants to. He will not be able to kiss Changkyun and hear him giggle when Kihyun’s fingers brush right below his ribs. He is not gonna listen him bubble about the first black hole photo or things Kihyun would never find interest if Changkyun isn’t the one talking. He will not lay beside Kihyun.

“No. No no. I fucked up.” Kihyun says over and over again, eyes stinging so bad and buries his face in Changkyun’s neck. He cluthes Changkyun more like he tries to hide himself in Changkyun’s embrace. He shakes with the strength of his sobs, not even Changkyun’s hand petting his faded purple locks can’t calm him down.

“I’m sorry Changkyun, I’m sorry. I fucked up. I fucked up so bad Changkyun I’m sorry. I don’t know if it’s worth anything now but I’m sorry I love you so much. Please forgive me. I’m sorry.” He repeats like a mantra.

Changkyun hugs him, hand trailing down his spine to comfort the elder but he sniffles too.

“Hyung it’s okay.” He says in whisper, pressing kisses to Kihyun’s left shoulder. He reaches up, holding Kihyun’s head with his hands and slips from under him. He sits up and Kihyun sits up too, hands on Changkyun’s hands. Changkyun brushes the tears trailing down on Kihyun’s face with his thumbs but they replace by new ones without wasting a millisecond. Kihyun wraps his arms around Changkyun’s waist and pulls him to his lap, sobbing more.

“No it’s not. It’s not okay. You don’t understand. I love you. I love you more than anything in this world. I love you so much and it hurts so much. My eyes look for you whenever I go to school. I can’t wait for hours to pass just to come and get you from your shift. You don’t undestand Changkyun. I thought you were lost in me but I’m lost in you.” Kihyun says, tipping his head back to look Changkyun. “I know I was an asshole. I was mean, arrogant, jerk, stupid. I agree with all of that. I am the stupidest person on this earth, hell, in this universe. But you are good enough to love me. I don’t know why you do that but you love me and I’m just so fucking stupid for not letting you in before. It wasn’t because of you Changkyun, it was because of me. I never thought you were easy, I never saw you as a prey. I care for you, I really do. And until now I didn’t know but I realized, I had no air around me before you. I breathe next to you Changkyun. If you are not here, I’ll suffocate. I’ll die. Please. I don’t care about Minhyuk. He can just do whatever he wants I don’t care. I’ll go to another school if I have to.” Kihyun says, gaze boring into Changkyun’s eyes. Suddenly this idea seem so meaningful to him. He can just drop the team and go to another school. It doesn’t matter what happens as long as his members are safe and he can see Changkyun.

Changkyun shakes his head and break Kihyun’s hopes. “No stop. Stop that hyung, it won’t work.” He says. “Minhyuk hyung is too stubborn, if he won’t change his mind no one can. Besides you can’t abandon your team. You are their captain. They count on you.”

“But—But I—“ Kihyun starts but Changkyun silences him with a kiss.

“All your life you worked for this hyung. You are a good leader, a good player. Your friends count on you. Promise me that you will not be an idiot and go swim in depression, just let it go. Promise me that you will win that game. For your members. For yourself.” Changkyun murmurs on his lips. He cups Kihyun’s face and digs his fingers softly in his cheeks.

Kihyun nods slowly even though he doesn’t want to, his throat hurts. He blinks a few tears back but manages to let words go out before they stuck in his throat. “I love you.” Kihyun sobs. “I’m sorry. I wish I didn’t do that. I wish you would just slap me, kick me, hate me. Don’t you feel angry at all Changkyun?”

Changkyun bites inside his cheek, his eyes get clouded before he nods. “I do. I feel angry but I love you more than that. You know that. You know that so well.” Changkyun says, hands drop to caress Kihyun’s hands on his waist softly. “But that doesn’t change the fact that my heart is hurting hyung. I can’t lie. It just hurts.” He says and smiles and Kihyun’s heart hurts more. “I feel angry, ashamed and pain. It was even worse when I learned it that night but still I stayed with you.”

Kihyun holds Changkyun’s hands in his own, sniffling. “Why did you do that?”

Changkyun shrugs, pursing his lips. “I don’t know, I couldn’t bare to leave. Maybe it’s because I also heard you were feeling somethings for me. It’s true that I felt betrayed but still, I didn’t want to go. Now too, I don’t want to go. I’m angry at you, I hate you even but I love you and it’s more important to me. Unfortunately Minhyuk hyung disagrees. I get him, he tries to protect me. He says I don’t care about me and I don’t know, maybe he is right. Maybe I need a second to breathe like he said. He always protects me hyung.”

“I can protect you.” Kihyun says but he knows he can’t. Because Changkyun should be protected from him. Because he is the one who hurts him. Only one maybe.

Changkyun throws him a bitter smile. “You can’t. Not this time.”

“I’m sorry.” Kihyun says, leaning his forehead to Changkyun’s chin.

“I know. I know you are sorry and to be honest I did forgive you, long before I learned the truth. And that scares me hyung, how willing I’m for you. Since the beginning. I knew something was up when you first approached me. It was one thing for you to be interested in me and whole another huge thing for you to want to sleep with me. Something wasn’t adding up. It was too story-like. Too fictional. But because I liked you for so long, I didn’t care about your reason. I didn’t ask. I was selfish too. I could have say no but I didn’t because finally, my crush was returning to my feelings. And later when you said you wanna keep this up I could have say no, yet again I didn’t. But also I knew this wasn’t something official. We were just calling each other when we needed. No strings attached. It was me who had a crush on you, so it was stupid of me to expect anything from you. That’s why I just loved you. Without asking you to love me back.”

“But I love you Changkyun. I love you back. I love you so much.” Kihyun replies holding Changkyun’s face between his hands and kiss him. Soft. Saying sorry. Saying I love you. Saying sorry.

Changkyun breaks the kiss and blinks slowly. “I know you love me. I know that. I know that now. Thank you hyung.” He says and places a kiss on Kihyun’s temple, feathery, "I'm sorry too." He says before he retreats completely, face concords with pain and climbs out of Kihyun’s lap, out of his reach.

Kihyun stays silent, unmoving. He watches Changkyun moving around to pick up his clothes and get dressed with a bleeding heart but he can’t say anything. He knows he can’t ask him to stay. He knows he should let this decision to him. He can save Changkyun from himself. At least he can do that. Even though he can’t bear to see the younger leaving.

“Changkyun.” Kihyun calls out still, hands gripping his blue sheets real tight. Tight, so tight enough to turn his knuckles white. It’s like a last, weak attempt, to stop him maybe and maybe make him comeback but he swallows his 'stops' and 'please stays'.

“You will always be mine.” Kihyun says with a bruised heart. Words spill out in silence, in dark and contains his real heart, feelings and they roll out of his tongue like a wish. A hope. And it’s not a statement, not quite like it. It’s a question, one will stay with him for a very long time.

Changkyun stops at the door and slightly turns, his face is emitted by the dark shadows. Even though his features don’t show much still he looks so pretty, his outline, his figure. Kihyun watches him, heart beating at his mouth and feels the tears brimming in his eyes when he sees the nod. “Always hyung.” Changkyun’s lips form a smile at Kihyun, broken. Sad. Hurt.

“I promised.”

And he leaves.

The next day on school when Kihyun walks pass the classrooms to go down to meet with his teammates for lunch, he sees Changkyun next to Minhyuk but he can't see the sad look younger throw his way before he turns the opposite way and Kihyun runs away, cries his heart out in the staff room before he walks to his friends like nothing happened.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Side not, I changed Altair and Vega's story slightly~~
> 
> I want you to understand that sometimes love doesn't enough to be together. Sometimes you are broken and you need a moment but you can't get away from the person your heart belongs to and people step in for you. Nobody is the bad guy here not Minhyuk not Kihyun not Changkyun. I hope you agree on that. Kihyun knew things would fuck up at some point but he was too careless.  
> Anyway sorry for commenting on my own story lol  
> Tell me what do you think and what do you think will happen???  
> Hope you liked the chapter^^

**Author's Note:**

> I wanna kick Kihyun for being an asshole.  
> My poor Changkyunnie T_T
> 
> What do you think? What should happen?  
> Tell me~~


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